A national gathering for women on behalf of the Shifra and Puah organization

00:01 Speaker 1 There is a saying: “A beautiful wife, beautiful furnishings, and a beautiful home broaden a person’s mind.” So, um, I have a short story about that saying, and I think it reflects everything we can learn from Shifrah and Puah, so that, with Hashem’s help, an organization like this will be established throughout the country. What is a beautiful home? Everyone knows what a beautiful home is, but after coming home from a very difficult birth, it’s hard to keep the home beautiful. That’s where Shifrah and Puah come in. First of all, the house is clean. There is, boruch Hashem—and I think this year, this first year—there was always somehow someone to clean. But you had to explain things to them and follow them around, and after they left you would say, “Well, never mind. The organization paid for it; who knows where they found the money.” It was done with kindness and compassion. This year, boruch Hashem, there is a team of women who come to help clean the house, and it’s truly a pleasure to see them. One or two arrive by car and drop everyone off exactly on time—and pick them up not exactly on time. They always give extra of their time, working energetically and happily, with a smile. They ask how you are, what the baby girl’s name is. They genuinely care about you, and of course they clean the house too, so you have a beautiful home. Then, after they leave, the children come home, boruch Hashem, and the house gets messy. But why should it? There’s a babysitter. They send you a babysitter, not at a fixed time; you tell them when it’s convenient for you, when you need her, depending on the children’s ages and so on. In the summer, it’s rather hard to send a babysitter to every new mother, so Shifrah and Puah run a day camp where you can send your children. And Heaven forbid you should have to exert yourself to take them there, or send your husband: they’ll send a minibus to your door to take the children there and back. Of course, they also make sure there’s a devoted

01:53 Speaker 1 and responsible teacher. If a child is still in diapers, she doesn’t say, “No, I don’t change diapers.” At day camps you pay for, you’re always told to bring everything, but the staff can be fussy. Not at Shifrah and Puah’s day camp. They’re trained and experienced and know how to do everything. And to round out the beautiful home, you also receive a gift. It’s a small gift that isn’t just materially lovely—sweet little things for you and the baby—but also includes a protection card for mother and child, a beautiful one you can hang on the stroller or crib. Again, you can see how much thought has gone into just the first thing we mentioned: a beautiful home. And beautiful furnishings. Beautiful furnishings. You’re in the maternity ward; you’ve given birth, no matter what hour of the day or night, whether it’s Shabbos, Yom Tov, or a weekday, and prepared food immediately arrives at your home and at the maternity ward for you too, because in most places you can’t eat what they serve there. Kfar Chabad has a communal kitchen that also serves Shifrah and Puah, and you receive prepared food in nice containers. So the dishes at home stay nice too. Your husband doesn’t have to take out twenty pots to fry one egg—burning it once, dropping it another time, and then deciding he wants to check on it. Instead, they send prepared food to your home and to the maternity ward, in nice disposable containers. You don’t have to bother opening everything to figure out what each dish is; it’s arranged by meal and by the number of children, and so on. When you finish eating, the babysitter who looked after the children also sees to it that your dishes stay nice and washes them. And of course you don’t have to go and collect the food; they bring it right to your door. Notice how they’ve thought through even the smallest details, imagining themselves inside the new mother’s home and looking after every single need. And a beautiful wife. So

03:35 Speaker 1 the story of a beautiful wife begins even before the birth. Um, for almost a year now, I think, since everyone understood that the Rebbe shlita gave an unequivocal instruction that husbands may not enter either the pre-labor room or the delivery room, this has been very hard for many women. Sometimes you need someone there, even if not for emotional support. You might just want a glass of water, just to moisten your lips, just to know exactly what’s happening and that you aren’t alone. Here too, Shifrah and Puah are there to help. In Kfar Chabad, it happened providentially that one of the main women who assists mothers is named Shifrah. I don’t think that’s a coincidence. She helps improve the baby’s condition and lifts the mother’s spirits. When a woman knows in advance that she isn’t going into a cold, rigid place alone with all the natural fears that come with it, but that she has someone accompanying her, it helps enormously. I experienced it myself, and it’s a very big thing. Then, when she comes home, if she has all that support around her, she isn’t on edge and isn’t so exhausted. She can sleep because the children are being cared for, the food is ready, and she doesn’t have to worry, “Oh, what will I make tomorrow? We need to go shopping.” Everything arrives at her home ready, and she can even look good. There’s now a new arrangement under which every new mother can come straight from the maternity ward to Em Vayeled here and rest at the recovery home. Of course, Shifrah and Puah do their part here too. They help financially when it’s difficult for someone or she can’t afford it. They help—and not only do they subsidize it, but if you can’t pay even the small amount that remains, Shifrah and Puah now have a new interest-free loan fund

05:15 Speaker 1 for that remainder. Well, that was a very, very brief overview, not from the organizational side but from the new mother’s point of view: how, when you give birth, you feel absolutely showered with kindness. You hardly know where to turn. As I said, they’re persistent—in the best sense of the word. There was actually a point, and I’m not joking, when the phone rang and I said, “Oh, that must be Shifrah and Puah. I wonder what new thing they’ve come up with today.” I’m not saying that now just because it sounds nice; that is genuinely how I felt. Women from outside, and relatives I’ve told about it, now tell my story themselves. They’ve experienced it through me. So what does it mean that these things “broaden a person’s mind”? This is what occurred to me while I was stopped at traffic lights. I didn’t have much time to think it through beforehand, because right now I’m rather busy planning day camps for you at Tzach. So I wasn’t thinking about the babies who were born, or how they were born. After all, you try to think a step ahead. I thought that “broaden a person’s mind” refers first of all to the husband: he can have peace of mind. He doesn’t need to worry about all these little things. The burden doesn’t fall so heavily on him, because he knows there’s an organization behind him, supporting everything happening at home and supporting his wife after the birth. But I also thought that today we are demanding Moshiach. I think that in the merit of this Shifrah and Puah organization and its deeds, we can demand that Moshiach come. Just as the Jewish people were redeemed from Egypt in the merit of Shifrah and Puah, because of the acts of kindness they performed—and in fact, the continued existence of the Jewish people was thanks to them—I think that today too, as it says, “A beautiful wife, beautiful furnishings, and a beautiful home broaden a person’s mind.” Here, too, I think we can broaden the mind, so to speak, of the Supernal Man, of Hakadosh Boruch Hu, and demand of Him

06:51 Speaker 1 that this broadening of a person’s mind take place. That we make more room, with expansiveness, for “the earth will be filled with the knowledge of Hashem as the waters cover the sea.” And in the merit of Shifrah and Puah’s deeds, which I know from Kfar Chabad—and which, with Hashem’s help, from today, from the moment this gathering began, are gaining greater strength throughout the country—we will demand, in the merit of this organization and its activities, Moshiach Tzidkeinu now.

07:21 Speaker 2 Yes, yes, those words were genuine. All of us here can attest to that. Surely great and powerful things are being done elsewhere too; everyone learns from everyone else, and the rivalry of scholars increases wisdom. In 770 News not long ago, an interesting reply was published. A woman wrote to the Rebbe shlita that her husband wanted her to have an abortion, G-d forbid, and this was the Rebbe’s holy reply: “This is not an abortion but, Heaven forbid, the killing of a fetus. It is self-evident that neither the mother of the fetus nor the father should even think of killing the fetus, Heaven forbid. Even someone who calls himself secular—who permits him to be a murderer? Heaven forbid, Heaven forbid. Even the Nazis, may their names be erased, did not kill their own children, only those of the Jewish people. [unclear] I will mention this at the Ohel.” These words are so powerful and speak for themselves about the struggle to protect life when it comes to terminating pregnancies. We’ll now hear from the minister’s adviser on halachic matters, on health matters according to halachah, Dr. Mordechai Halperin. Please.

08:50 Speaker 3 Here, there—which one? Here is more comfortable; there is by the microphone. That’s fine. Uh, the subject is interesting and important, and even serious. When we speak about the struggle for life in the context of terminating a pregnancy, we’re really speaking about a struggle involving three different parties. First the fetus, then the mother, and then society—or whoever comes from outside the immediate family unit of mother and fetus to try to save the fetus. The fetus struggles. In recent years, videos have been made using ultrasound, sonograms, in real time during an attempted termination of pregnancy. They show the fetus constantly trying to evade the instruments that ultimately kill it. It struggles as best it can, instinctively. It doesn’t yet have understanding; it hasn’t been born, and even an infant does not yet have full understanding. At what age does understanding develop? That’s not such a simple question at all. But instinctively, this fetus struggles to escape the instruments, and it does not succeed. The second party is the mother. In every case of pregnancy termination, the mother goes through a struggle. She wrestles with forces for and against it, and if she ultimately went ahead, it is because one force prevailed over the others. But the struggle does not leave her for the rest of her life. In some cases—not a large proportion, but a significant one—terminating a pregnancy causes infertility. Sometimes it can be treated, and we know women who have no children throughout their lives because of abortions they had when they were young. The third party in the struggle is someone from outside who wants to help the mother, help the fetus, help them both live. The purpose of this talk is not to teach the fetus how to behave. The fetus cannot hear us, and it cannot understand, either. I also don’t think the purpose is to explain, to try to persuade mothers how good it is to give birth despite all the difficulties,

11:25 Speaker 3 despite the pain of childbirth, despite the difficulty of raising children. That is not the purpose of this talk. The question is whether there really are ways for someone outside the small unit of mother and fetus to influence her so that the fetus can be saved. And here we need to know one thing: first, there must be communication between them and that person—whether it is someone from the Shifra and Puah organization, Shifra and Puah, or from Efrat or Nefesh Achat, or any other organization engaged in trying to save lives. There must be communication, and for there to be communication, you have to speak to the woman in her language. “In her language” also means literally: if she speaks Russian and stammers in Hebrew, you need to speak Russian with her. But it is not only a matter of language; it is also a matter of outlook. A woman who... if halachic values do not interest her and I start explaining to her how important this is according to halachah, I am wasting my time. Or if Chassidic values do not interest her and I explain how important it is that the Rebbe said so, then here, too, all I am doing is bringing disrespect upon the Rebbe, and I have not helped at all. You have to speak to her in her language, and here we need to know a few things that apply to every woman. So when I speak about her language, I mean a woman who is mentally well, not a woman with a psychiatric disturbance. I’ve just come from Abarbanel, a psychiatric hospital in Bat Yam. There are people there with psychiatric disturbances, people who are mentally ill, and they have feelings too, but their emotional responses can be impaired. A woman who is mentally well has feelings, and she has a struggle. First we need to know what brings her to agree to, or want to have, an abortion. If it is a health problem, perhaps it is a health problem that requires an abortion because her life is in danger. Halachah says it is necessary; her life takes precedence. That is rare, though. Perhaps she thinks there is a health problem? Did some doctor frighten

13:30 Speaker 3 her? Not out of bad intentions, but to make sure no lawsuit would be brought against him, he said, “This is terribly dangerous.” Yet when we examine it more thoroughly, it may turn out not to be dangerous. So here we really need to get a second, convincing medical opinion that this case may not be life-threatening—if it indeed is not life-threatening. Another situation: some women have an abortion because they think the fetus is at risk. They took some pill, and a doctor told them their baby would be born with severe deformities. I am not getting into the halachic question of whether it is permitted or forbidden; a woman who follows halachah will do what the rabbi tells her. If she is not a woman who observes mitzvos, then we need to examine medically whether this is true or not. It is worth knowing that in ninety percent of the cases—cases of abortions carried out because of concern that medication taken during pregnancy had harmed the fetus—it turns out there was no basis for that concern, or that it was based on old information that proved to be incorrect. There are centers today; the leading one is in Jerusalem, under Professor Ornoy at Hadassah Ein Kerem Hospital. He advises doctors and families on whether taking a particular medication actually poses a real risk. It has turned out that in most cases, the belief that the fetus has been harmed is simply incorrect. For example, a woman had a chest X-ray, or even an abdominal X-ray, in the first week of pregnancy, which is supposed to be the most dangerous time, when development is most sensitive. Many doctors are convinced that this is a reason to suggest an abortion out of concern for risks to the fetus. Medically, that is simply not true. This frightening warning, though well-intentioned, stems from a lack of medical knowledge. People once thought so; today we know it is not true. In other words, when what is driving the woman is fear of harm to herself or to the fetus, we need

15:28 Speaker 3 to check it. And when we speak about harm to the fetus—these cases involve over three thousand abortions a year performed on the grounds of concern that the fetus may be harmed—it turns out that in around ninety percent of them, the concern stems from incorrect medical information. So if you establish a relationship of trust and the woman is worried, you can refer her to the national expert in this field recommended by the Ministry of Health, Professor Ornoy at Hadassah Hospital in Jerusalem. Uh, I don’t know—I don’t remember his number by heart, but the number for Hadassah Hospital is four two seven four two seven. Anyone can inquire and reach him. It can be found out. Preferably, this should be done through a medical intermediary so they can speak in terms they both understand, and that service can be provided. In Israel, legally, about eighteen thousand abortions are performed a year—between seventeen and eighteen thousand. About three thousand, a little over three thousand, are due to concern about harm to the fetus. But what about the rest? The legal provision—we are not dealing here with legal questions—that is used most often is concern about harm to the woman’s health. When you examine the file, it is not actually an ordinary medical problem but a mental-health issue. In other words, she is having a hard time. I have seen medical opinions stating that it is recommended to terminate the pregnancy because the woman is afraid of giving birth. So she is anxious. I don’t know a woman who isn’t apprehensive about giving birth, and if a woman isn’t afraid of giving birth, I would suggest she get herself checked. Now, likewise, I don’t know a woman who doesn’t find it hard to raise several children at home. And I don’t know a woman—allow me to say this here—who doesn’t sometimes argue with her husband, either. I don’t know one of those, either. Perhaps there are rare ones, hidden tzaddikim whom I have not met. So when you see things like this, it means that this is not really a medical reason,

17:21 Speaker 3 Rather, it’s the same social-welfare clause that moved from clause five to clause four, and then the question is what can be done. That’s one type of case. But before that type, which usually involves a married woman, I want to ask: what about an unmarried woman? That’s a completely different story. I’ll get to that too. So, regarding a married woman: it has become clear—and this is now supposed to be studied formally as well—that when a woman sees the condition of the fetus, when she sees its head and its beating heart on an ultrasound and knows what she’s looking at, not some vague thing inside her belly but a living being, she’ll think three times, and in some cases she’ll change her mind. Now, the reasons she wants an abortion aren’t always that she herself wants one. Sometimes it’s social pressure from family, friends, her husband, or—sometimes even the social worker. I’m a gynecologist by profession, and I can’t forget cases where I examined women in the hospital, for a medical examination, who were due to undergo an abortion. And then I’d see it in a woman’s eyes—for example, a divorced mother of two. In her eyes, I could see that the fetus was, in effect, speaking to her. So I’d ask her, “Why do you want an abortion?” “Because I have no choice. They told me there’s no other way, that I have to. I can’t keep the baby; it will destroy the family.” Well, when I saw that spark in her eyes—that she actually wanted the baby but felt forced by social pressure—I simply used the language usually used by the other side. I said, “Look, you’re in charge of your own body. Don’t let anyone dictate what you do. You decide, and whatever you decide, we and others will help you.” I gave her Efrat’s phone number. I said, “If you really want to, call them. You’ll discover that an abortion isn’t inevitable.” She

19:10 Speaker 3 picked up the phone herself; they didn’t call her. I insisted that she make the call. If she called, it would mean she wanted to. She called the Efrat Association, received advice and assistance, and a few months later, after she gave birth, she told me that her home had actually been half-destroyed. She was a divorced woman with two children. In other words, this rebuilt her home. Her daughters, who had begun to become emotionally and socially unstable, suddenly reconnected with the family and helped her care for the baby. The family suddenly came together, and things improved in every respect. So when it comes to social pressure, you have to tell her: “You’re in charge of your own body. You decide.” Of course, it would be good to give her information. The Efrat Association has produced several things at different levels. This is a pamphlet, this is a brochure, and these are pages in Russian. You have to speak to women in their own language. If they’ve come from Russia and don’t know Hebrew, speak to them in Russian. Here is A Baby’s Diary. It’s available in Hebrew, English and Russian. I assume you’ve seen it and that most people here are familiar with it. If not, you can get it simply by contacting the Efrat Association. P.O. Box 6325, Jerusalem—I hope I’ve got that right. This one is in Russian. The numbers are the same in Russian, but perhaps that’s the pharmacy’s P.O. box. So I’ll tell you exactly what to do. You know what? If you’re in doubt, write to Dr. Schussheim, 6 Reines Street, and it will get there. That’s simplest. Why make things complicated? In any case, what’s in this Baby’s Diary? It describes the fetus in its early stages, with photographs, as though the fetus is telling its story: “Here I am, just beginning to develop. Now my head and eyes are developing. Now my heart is working. Oy vey, now my mother is beginning to sense me, and to my surprise, she’s worried instead of happy,

21:27 Speaker 3 and suddenly I see that she has plans for me. How can I tell her I want to live?” And at the end it says, “Mom, I want to live. This is the last moment—save me.” That’s the idea, and it speaks to every woman. So much so that there are social workers who claim women mustn’t be given it. No, no, I—every word I’ve said is serious and is based on the experience of people working in the field who know. I’m leaving you some copies here in Russian, and it’s also available in Hebrew and English. Contact Dr. Schussheim at 6 Reines Street and you’ll get them. So again, it can be done through... Of course, you have to approach her without being coercive. The aim is to help her. “You’re in charge of your own body. You decide. But you should have all the information and know that there are many ways to help that you may not be aware of.” The problem might be purely financial. Immigrants from Russia with a Lithuanian mindset—I don’t know if I’m allowed to say that in this building. Anyway, they do the calculation, the simple calculation: “We need to get ahead. We’re new immigrants; for about two years we can’t afford to...” And if she suddenly learns that she can receive support of a hundred dollars a month, then on the contrary, she’ll want two children. Things like that have happened. You can contact Efrat; there are criteria, and there are cases where help is available. So you can give her that option. You can make the connection and reinforce it with a brochure. You can suggest that she see an ultrasound and understand what’s happening. Incidentally, some hospitals take women scheduled for abortions and perform ultrasounds, but make sure the women don’t see the fetus. They’re concerned that the women might change their minds. I think that goes against medical ethics. She deserves the information, even if it leads her to change her decision. So perhaps it would be worthwhile to pay for an ultrasound at a private clinic, with a detailed explanation so she can see what

23:16 Speaker 3 she’s looking at. This is the head, these are the hands, this is the heart. You can see other things too, depending on how far along the pregnancy is. It might be a good idea to pay for an ultrasound at a private clinic, with explanations—to have a thoughtful doctor there to explain it. By the way, the doctor doesn’t have to be religious. I know many secular doctors who try to persuade women or girls not to have an abortion. What about unmarried women? If they have a boyfriend and are thinking of getting married in the distant future, but they feel it’s too soon, I’ve heard serious doctors who aren’t religious persuade the couple: “It would be a shame. Get married now. Don’t ruin things.” And in many cases it works. But what do you do with a young unmarried woman, a high-school student, whose life, according to the way society works in Israel, will be ruined? She won’t finish high school, G-d forbid; she won’t go into the army—she has no choice. Everything. How do you deal with something like that? What do you suggest saying to her? “Look, everything you think is nonsense”? That won’t work at all. Anyone who has tried knows it won’t work. I’ll give you a tip. Four months ago, an article appeared in Ma’ariv LaNoar, copied from one of the major American weekly magazines. I don’t remember whether it was Newsweek or a magazine of that caliber. It was about a high-school girl who became pregnant and was pressured by her boyfriend—and that’s very, very common—to have an abortion. People told her, “It will ruin your future, ruin everything.” But she decided, “No. I’ll face it. I’ll have the baby and deal with it.” She finished high school, went to university and gave birth along the way, with her parents’ full support. In other words, when there is support from the parents, a young woman here can raise the child too. I’m not talking about putting the baby up for adoption; she keeps the child and raises it herself. This article is not an article

25:04 Speaker 3 A “missionary,” in quotation marks. She isn’t trying to convince other people that this is what they should do. She says, “My example isn’t an example for everyone,” but at least she balances the picture against what society presents today, as though there were no alternative. There is an alternative, depending on what you yourself want to do. I think it would be worthwhile to use this article. Again, I gave a copy to Dr. Schussheim. You can contact him and ask for copies, and in cases where you think it might help, you can offer it as food for thought. Again, there is no guarantee it will work. As with any medical treatment I analyze, there is no such thing as a hundred percent success rate. We have to pray that Hakadosh Boruch Hu will help. And to conclude, there was a case of a single woman, a young single woman, who came in to have an abortion. She was admitted and went through the committee. As the doctor, I examined her medically to make sure the procedure itself posed no risks. And again, that same spark in her eyes. She was carrying twins, by the way. That same spark in her eyes: if it were one, perhaps, but two would really be a shame. No, it isn’t funny. Incidentally, we’ve had cases where, the moment women learned there were two, they changed their minds and withdrew the request. In any case, she was still going ahead. Why? Her boyfriend had threatened to break off the relationship if she didn’t have an abortion. What did her family say? “Whatever you want.” Well, I explained to her that she was in charge of her own body, that this was hers to decide, and that these were living beings. She should decide and do what she thought was right. After a great deal of deliberation, she decided that, even though she risked losing her boyfriend, she wanted—she decided to carry the babies and give birth to them. Well, her boyfriend left her, and then her family suddenly began to think differently and pressure her to have the abortion after all. At first they had supported her; now they began pressuring her. Since I had helped her get in touch with

27:04 Speaker 3 Efrat, she received encouragement, held firm, and gave birth to the twins, thank G-d, long after she had separated from her boyfriend. She gave birth to them in Jerusalem. A week after the birth, her boyfriend came back to her, and a short time later they married. Some of the women here may know this story. It happened two years ago, and it shows that sometimes there can be a happy ending in every respect. In any case, she gained a great deal by giving birth: she avoided taking the lives of those unborn babies, something that can be done so easily today in so many places in Israel and around the world. So I would sum things up in three sentences. We must act, and we can act. We can help women do what their inner feelings are telling them to do. We must help them overcome the outside pressures—and they are always outside pressures, apart from those rare cases involving the woman’s health. We can do that by providing accurate medical information, by offering encouragement, sometimes by giving practical support, sometimes simply by giving emotional support, and sometimes more than that is needed. But the principle is to speak to each woman in her own language, not just literally, but in terms of how she understands the issue. I’m leaving you some brochures in Russian, as well as another Efrat publication called A Guide for the Pregnant Woman. It contains information that can make a difference, including important information about medical care. With these materials, you can approach a wide range of women and help them do what they truly want to do in their hearts. Wishing you success.

29:32 Speaker 4 The nurse’s question.

29:32 Speaker 3 There is a reason for it, and there are different kinds of injections. It’s true that many women would be fine without it, but there is a minority who could suffer a fatal hemorrhage without it, and it might not always be noticed in time. For their sake, all women receive it. And I think—

29:48 Speaker 4 A woman has the right to refuse it.

29:50 Speaker 3 A woman has rights. A woman also has the right to jump off a roof. But if, medically, she puts herself at risk by not receiving it—even if the risk is five percent, even if it’s one percent—then the fact that she’s afraid of a needle...

30:07 Speaker 4 No, no, not the needle. It’s the pain.

30:08 Speaker 3 Oh, no, no. That pain is caused by the uterus contracting. Look, when I examine a woman and she tells me she has that pain, I say, “I’m really glad.” It’s a sign that the uterus is contracting. No, if it contracts, she’ll have pain anyway. A contracting uterus hurts. Now, I agree that some women would be fine without it, with pain from the contractions in any case. But if we withhold it, we put some women at risk, and I can never know whether it’s you, or you, or her. There’s no way to know. So when there is a protocol—and this applies to other matters as well—I strongly recommend not interfering with medical protocols unless there is a good reason. More than that: on Shabbos, we often tell the doctor, “Doctor, I don’t have a fever, so don’t write that down.” That is very, very dangerous. If you were alone and had no fever, and nothing was written down, that would be all right. But when there are another twenty, thirty, or forty women who have given birth in the ward, and one has a temperature recorded and another doesn’t, that can lead to a life-threatening situation after childbirth. If our Sages required a woman to eat on Yom Kippur during the first three days after giving birth even when everything seems fine—as Rabbi Shlomo Zalman once told me, “We know that today nothing will happen in most cases, but it will happen to one woman in a thousand; for her sake, we will have them all eat”—then we should also record whether there is a fever or not. That is one of the most important indicators of whether there is an infection in the uterus. An infection of the uterus can be fatal if antibiotics are not given in time. That is why I’m saying this. We have to be careful. As a doctor, there are things I won’t write down, and I’ll know that I haven’t written them down; or, if I do write them, I’ll write them in an altered way. If it’s urgent,

31:40 Speaker 3 I’ll write it immediately, without any change, as the Shulchan Aruch says. That is a ruling concerning a doctor. But a patient who tells the doctor, “This, yes; that, no,” sometimes endangers not only herself but those around her. In a ward, where it is so difficult to keep track of every detail and prevent mistakes, mistakes can happen as a result. The problem right now is a social problem. Today in Israel, having an abortion is considered reasonable, while giving birth and placing a child for adoption is not considered reasonable. In other words, it is a problem of education and public awareness. Once we solve that problem, the other problem will resolve itself. Until then, it will be very difficult to succeed on a broad scale, apart from individual cases. Well, I’ve been told there is no time for questions, so... I assume there will be other opportunities. If you have questions, you can direct them either to me at the Ministry of Health—Dr. Halperin, Office of the Deputy Minister of Health—or to Dr. Schussheim on the subject of abortions. Efrat Association, 6 Reines Street, Jerusalem. Thank you very much.

33:01 Speaker 5 We don’t want to stop, but time is short. Thank you very much indeed, and much appreciation. Everything we’ve heard relates to the final resolution. All the things that were said relate to the final resolution that the Shifra and Puah organization will work together with the Chaya organization to prevent abortions and to help, support, and encourage women in their distress. We hope that you will indeed continue this work and succeed in it, each of you in your own place. It says of the midwives, “When you help the Hebrew women give birth, look at the birthstool.” What is the birthstool? Rashi explains: the place where a woman sits to give birth. Why is it called avnayim, “stones”? Yalkut Shimoni tells us something very interesting. The avnayim are like a potter’s wheel. What does that mean? The potter has a thigh on one side and a thigh on the other, with the wheel in the middle; so too the woman giving birth has a thigh on one side and a thigh on the other, with the little baby in the middle. It offers another explanation. Why avnayim? It says, “And some say that when she crouches to give birth, her thighs grow cold like stones.” What we call today the chill of childbirth. How does one go through all that and then say with a smile, “It was an easy birth”? On that subject, we’ll hear from Rebbetzin Sima Ashkenazi of Kfar Chabad, who is active as part of N’shei Chabad generally and N’shei Chabad in Kfar Chabad. Please, Mrs. Sima Ashkenazi. An easy birth.

34:58 Speaker 6 Hello, everyone. An easy birth is a prayer, a plea, every woman’s dream. In Scripture we find the expression “anguish like a woman in labor.” The book of Tehillim says that when Moshiach comes, speedily in our days, amen, all the nations that harmed the Jewish people—the wicked among the nations of the world—will be gripped by terror and fear. To emphasize just how great that terror and anxiety will be, Tehillim says, “Trembling seized them there, anguish like a woman in labor.” That is the height of anxiety. There is no better example or comparison for what we will soon see among all the nations that oppressed and tormented the Jewish people throughout the years of our exile. And we have to contend with it. Hakadosh Boruch Hu decreed upon us, “In pain you shall bear children.” We understand that curse to mean the pain of pregnancy, the pain of childbirth, and the pain of raising children. It is very interesting that the Torah tells us things were entirely different in Egypt. There, women gave birth to six children at a time—sextuplets. And if twins were mentioned here, just imagine what it means to carry sextuplets and give birth to sextuplets. They gave birth beneath the apple tree, without assistance, without a midwife. That is what the midwives told Pharaoh. When he confronted them and became very angry, they gave what seems, at first, to be a very simple, innocent explanation: “For they are vigorous; before the midwife comes to them, they have given birth.” They did not need midwives at all. They were compared to the animals of the field; they gave birth without any assistance. And the Rebbe shlita expla— What would any of us think? What did Pharaoh think at that moment? Surely, if it was not a lie, it was at least an exaggeration. “Before the midwife comes to them, they have given birth”—how could that be? The Rebbe shlita says it was not an exaggeration. It was not a lie. As the Rebbe points out, this was a reality that could be verified; there was no point in lying about it. Pharaoh could have said: Fine, do not kill one of the children. Let a woman who is about to give birth deliver her baby, and I will come and see for myself. It would not have been difficult for him to verify the truth. So when they said, “For they are vigorous,” that they gave birth without assistance, they were telling the absolute truth. It seems strange to us. We have explained the decree, and we have explained “anguish like a woman in labor,” which Scripture itself presents as something real and understandable. But on the other hand, how did this miracle happen? The simplest explanation—and I want to bring the words straight from the text so we can see them as they are—is this: “From here we learn that the righteous women…” The text is speaking about Egypt, about righteous women who were not subject to Chava’s decree. This is in Tractate Sotah. Those righteous women in Egypt were not subject to Chava’s decree. The decree of “in pain,” encompassing the pain of pregnancy, childbirth, and raising children, did not apply to them. Why? Perhaps we, too, can learn the appropriate lesson, so that we, too, can pray and plead and merit an easy birth. The Gemara tells us that the modesty of the Jewish women in Egypt was so great. We know that they did not change four things: their Jewish names, their Jewish language, their Jewish dress, or their religion. By religion, the Rebbe adds in the Haggadah of Pesach, we mean their faith and customs. So because the Jewish women in Egypt were so modest, and influenced the men and the entire people through their modesty, they truly were not subject to Chava’s decree. This is one path that the holy Torah offers every woman who has a prayer, a plea, and a dream, so that she may also know what she can do. And perhaps, as an aside, we should hear what the Torah tells us about modesty in general.

38:16 Speaker 6 About deliverance and rescue: even if, G-d forbid, a decree has already been issued against a person—and it would seem that once it has been decreed, it cannot be changed—even then, modesty can change it. Our Sages tell us about King Shaul, who was, in fact, liable to death according to the law. Shaul was a pursuer: he pursued David to kill him, and “if someone comes to kill you, rise early to kill him first.” That is an explicit mitzvah. Yet Scripture says: “You are liable to death, but the modesty you possessed saved you.” Scripture tells us that Shaul was very, very modest, particularly in his private space. We tend to think of modesty as a mitzvah for women, not so much for men. But the mitzvah of modesty applies to everyone, and all the more strongly to women. Even when Shaul was in his private space, the Torah says, even in secluded, unclean places where there is no mezuzah, he distinguished himself by his great modesty. Therefore, although his actions made him liable to death, “the modesty you possessed saved you.” Scripture also says that someone who is modest is saved from snakes, scorpions, and other harmful creatures. They cannot harm a Jew who bears the image of G-d. When, G-d forbid, can harmful creatures cause harm? Everything has an address. They can do so when, G-d forbid, it has been decreed; they are only messengers. They cannot decide on their own to come and harm a Jew, G-d forbid, unless he appears to them like an animal. When he bears the image of G-d, they cannot harm him. So even if, G-d forbid, a decree has been issued against a person, if that person is modest, they can change it. They are saved from harmful creatures, from snakes and scorpions. All the more so with childbirth: we see how one can be spared all those difficulties of labor. But then the question arises: why were midwives needed in Egypt at all?

40:52 Speaker 6 If every woman gave birth and managed on her own, why did she need help? And how could two women possibly have been enough for the whole people? “The people multiplied and became very strong,” and “the land was filled with them.” What could four hands accomplish? And if they really had no work to do, why did they deserve such a great reward? What justified the reward they ultimately received from Hakadosh Boruch Hu—“And G-d was good to the midwives”? Especially when we consider that Miriam was a five-year-old girl: could a five-year-old really assist a woman giving birth? The point is that their mission was to reassure the women in labor, to coo to them, to coo to the babies, to smile at them, to calm the babies and calm their mothers. Nothing more than that. Shifrah and Puah did not assist with the birth as we understand a midwife’s role today. Yet the person who calms a woman in labor is held in such high esteem, and her reward is so great. That is how important the mother’s peace of mind is. We see this in the laws of Shabbos. A question is asked: a woman in labor needs to travel to a particular hospital, and it is Shabbos. Ordinarily, because of the need to minimize the violation of Shabbos, she must go to the nearest hospital. But if she says, “I would feel much calmer at a different hospital, with the particular doctor or woman doctor I had planned to have help me give birth. Now the birth has fallen on Shabbos, but I will not feel calm if I go to this nearer hospital, where I had not intended to give birth”—then according to halachah she must be taken to the farther hospital. Her peace of mind during labor is very, very important, no less…

43:24 Speaker 6 Why were midwives needed in Egypt at all? If every woman gave birth and managed on her own, what help did they need? And how could just two midwives possibly keep up with the people? “The people multiplied and grew strong, very, very much, and the land was filled with them.” What could four hands possibly do? And if they really had no work to do, why were they deserving of such a great reward? What justified the reward they ultimately received from Hakadosh Boruch Hu? “And G-d was good to the midwives.” All things considered, since Miriam was a five-year-old child, could a five-year-old really help a woman give birth? The point is that their mission was to calm the women in labor, coo to them, coo to the babies, smile at them, and put both the babies and their mothers at ease. Nothing more than that. Shifrah and Puah did not assist with the birth the way we understand a midwife’s role today. And yet we praise someone who calms a woman in labor, and speak of how great her reward is. That is how important the mother’s peace of mind is. We see this in the laws of Shabbos. A question arises: A woman in labor needs to travel to a particular maternity hospital, and it is Shabbos. In principle, because travel involves a violation of Shabbos, she must go to the nearest maternity hospital. But if she says, “I would feel much more at ease at another hospital, with the particular doctor I had planned to have help me deliver. Now the birth has fallen on Shabbos, but I won’t feel at ease if I go to this nearby hospital where I hadn’t planned to give birth”—then according to halachah, she must be taken to the more distant hospital. That is because her peace of mind during labor is very, very important, no less...

00:08 Speaker 1 We’ll get to the truth. Hello, I hope I can speak loudly enough. Louder? All right. Rebbetzin Ashkenazi spoke. I was among those who... For our generation, this was nothing new, and... I enjoy being present when a child comes into the Jewish people. Many women have truly benefited from this support. Why, and how? We simply didn’t know. No, I didn’t know the answer. I came to a few conclusions, and I’d just like to share them with you. The truth is that, in the natural course of things, a woman is connected to the baby she is carrying not only emotionally. She pictures the baby in her imagination and thinks about it all day long. We often see that, even in the very earliest stages of pregnancy, she turns inward; she isn’t quite with us. She’s in another world. Everything around her seems to fade beside this tiny being. Sometimes her husband feels as though... her. He doesn’t understand her. There is a special holiness within her. At the beginning of labor, the woman can still share some of her feelings with her husband. His presence calms her. While the contractions are still... she is still at home. She needs to lie down, and the pains grow stronger. As at the beginning of pregnancy, she and the child she carries... She is above ordinary, everyday concerns. It’s as if she’s in a balloon floating a little above them. She is in constant prayer, in direct contact with Hakadosh Boruch Hu. And the midwives—she needs to... so that they can help her. So even if she answers you, know that this is not the time to talk about the house, and certainly not about a new recipe. I once read that when a woman in labor is about to give birth, holiness rests there. And as the baby enters the world, there are the Shechinah and holiness... and impurity. This is what is explained in the parsha... In fact, the husband cannot feel what she is going through. He only sees that his wife is suffering. He feels helpless. It’s hard for him. Very hard for him.

04:41 Speaker 1 So I can tell you this from a great deal of experience: he can be outside the delivery room, and he can... She is engaged in work, in holy work, and sees nothing else. He sees something entirely different. He sees that there isn’t much privacy in a delivery room. People may not come in, but they pass by. There may be clerks and technicians, and... The husband feels it, but there is nothing he can do. Where is the modesty? Where is...? And here his wife is even joking with the staff. The husband feels close to her, too. That’s how he feels: both distance and closeness at the same time. How good it is... for her husband in this new situation. By the way, when I took this preparation course, we raised a number of points, and a gynecologist said, “I wasn’t... at a birth.” You could put it as they do in English: “to be”—simply to be there. Be there with the woman, keep an eye on the IV, notice if anything is wrong and then call for help. You can massage her through her clothing. Moistening her lips is very soothing. Do it together with her, if she has learned how. Once, when I accompanied a woman in labor, it wasn’t her first or second birth. It was a very, very difficult labor; she was on medication and kept falling asleep. Every two minutes she would open her eyes. “I’m still here. Yes, I’m still here.” That’s how I spent the whole night. She surely doesn’t remember it. She was completely groggy: she would fall asleep, then open her eyes to see whether I was there. I think that is a very, very important role. There is another point. With repeated births, a woman sometimes feels that she is being seen as primitive. She gives birth every year, and the medical staff can make her feel a little mocked, a little looked down on: “You religious women.” Here, a companion can certainly help.

08:24 Speaker 1 She has time to speak with the midwife, and her conduct can influence—and certainly does influence—the staff. She can convey that the mother truly wants this child, and that this is not the result of being primitive but of a deep desire to bring another Jewish soul into the world. Our Sages said that we must live with the weekly parsha. This parsha tells of the division of the Land among the tribes. We have not yet returned to the point where that division will take place, but today the land is divided among many Chabad centers, small and not so small, and Chabad’s influence is felt in every hospital. At the end of the parsha it says, “We will cross over as an advance guard before Hashem.” I think that in this area, too, we should set an example and see our help for women giving birth as breaking new ground, as going ahead before Hashem: helping the mother on the one hand, and having a positive Jewish influence on the medical staff on the other. May all those who have not yet had the opportunity invite me soon, so that I can help them when they give birth. Thank you very much, and yasher koach. From another angle, to conclude: continuing what we heard from Rebbetzin Ashkenazi, the Rebbe ends that sicha with something remarkable. The Rebbe asks how it was possible for two women to assist so many women through, bli ayin hara, so many births. Even if we say their help was only psychological, as was mentioned, two women would still not have been enough. The Rebbe then points out one thing. I have to read it: “We must say that they were not ordinary women, but exceptionally righteous women. For when the Jewish women knew that there were such exceptional women, two midwives were enough to put their minds at ease.” In the merit of righteous women, our ancestors were redeemed from Egypt, and in the merit of those righteous women we will be redeemed. We can only ask the women of Shifrah and Puah, who have now joined together in a nationwide organization, that before every

11:30 Speaker 1 undertaking, and before every additional act of kindness and tzedakah they do, they offer a prayer before the merciful G-d and ask [unclear]. In the merit of the tzedakah they do in thought, speech and action, may Hakadosh Boruch Hu bestow tzedakah from Above—the greatest tzedakah, the greatest kindness for the Jewish people: the Geulah through Moshiach Tzidkeinu, immediately, right now. In their merit we were redeemed, and in their merit we will be redeemed. Just a few announcements. There are books for sale here: Yashar Min Halev, Besod Hanashiyus, a book about nursing, and others. They cost 17 shekels, or 15 shekels each for a group purchase. Shir Hamaalos is also available for three shekels; you can order it as a gift for a new mother. At the display table you’ll find gifts for new mothers, Kinas Sofrim, and a great deal of useful information. There is also another idea here: a ready-made kit with everything for either a boy or a girl. If a husband is in a hurry and needs to bring his wife things for her discharge but doesn’t know what to bring, there is a package ready for him. It has an outfit, undershirts, a bottle, a bib, a pacifier, a blanket, ointment, cloth diapers, disposable diapers—everything. There is one for a boy and one for a girl. Anyone who wants can borrow one, or buy it afterward at a greatly reduced price. You can have a look and make arrangements. The Kiryat Malachi branch is selling decorative tzedakah boxes for three shekels each. You can see them at the entrance. There are also forms there for sale. Maternity dresses are available to borrow in memory of our friend Bracha Halperin, a"h; you can get them from Mrs. Naomi Riskin. Anyone who has not yet paid can pay now, and anyone who is owed change can get it from Mrs. Dalia. A few more announcements: there will, of course, be a meal shortly, with Hashem’s help. What? And afterward, with Hashem’s help, we’ll meet here again for a new, varied program. There are sandwiches there.

14:01 Speaker 1 From the Rishon branch. I’m not exactly sure what. We’ll come and see. Shir Hamaalos for sale. All right, all the best, enjoy your meal. In this part of the symposium, representatives from several of the branches will tell us, in practical terms, about the wonderful work they do. We are now in the Three Weeks, a time when we so eagerly await and long for the coming of Moshiach and the building of the Beis Hamikdash. We know there was a difference between the First Beis Hamikdash and the Second Beis Hamikdash, and there will certainly be a difference with the Third Beis Hamikdash, which will be built. To understand these differences, there is a Chassidic analogy about several kinds of students. One student is outstanding: he absorbs everything his teacher says perfectly. He can repeat word for word what he learned from his teacher, but he has one shortcoming. He cannot come up with something new on his own. If he encounters a new question, he will find it very hard to work it out by himself, because his strength lies in being “a plastered cistern that loses not a drop.” He receives what he is taught, and that is all. There is another student, perhaps on a lower level than the first, because although he understood and absorbed his teacher’s words, he did not do so quite as perfectly. But he has an advantage over the first: he can tackle a new question when he encounters one. Perhaps not on his teacher’s level, but he can still tackle it. In the First Beis Hamikdash, as we know, there was a wonderful G-dly light that came from above to below. It had the Aron. There was a constant fire that descended from Heaven. There were the Urim and Tumim, and so on, as is well known. But that light was so lofty that it was not fully connected to this world. For that reason, the Beis Hamikdash did not endure forever and was destroyed. The Second Beis Hamikdash was like the second student. It lacked five things. It did not have the

17:12 Speaker 1 Aron. It did not have the Urim and Tumim; fire did not descend from Heaven, among other things. Its G-dly light was also not on such a high level. But it had the advantage of working from below upward, in that it was built even through the will of a non-Jew. Cyrus was moved to build the Beis Hamikdash. But because it lacked that lofty G-dly light, it too did not endure and was destroyed. The Third Beis Hamikdash will be like a third kind of student: one who has absorbed his teacher’s words perfectly, yet when he needs to develop something new, can do so on his teacher’s level. The Third Beis Hamikdash will have a lofty and wonderful light from above, but it will also be very deeply connected to this world. That is why it will be eternal. In connection with the Beis Hamikdash, we can also speak of the holy work of the women of Shifra and Puah—indeed, of all the women here. Shifra and Puah were Yocheved and Miriam, righteous women in Egypt. They brought actual rescue to the Jewish children after the cruel Pharaoh’s terrible decree, as was discussed in today’s talk. But they did not bring only physical rescue; they also brought spiritual light. As the Rebbe explains in one of his sichos, “And they kept the children alive”—the girls, too. They brought them to life with Jewish light and gave them a true Jewish education. There is no doubt that, for us and for everyone sitting here who is active in Shifra and Puah, Shifra and Puah were the first. They are certainly our example. But today, in our time, what was a decree under Pharaoh is called culture. Not bringing another child into the world is called progress. Aborting a child, G-d forbid, is certainly considered quite acceptable and is not seen as a decree. So the work of Shifra and Puah today is doubly difficult, and nevertheless these women

19:52 Speaker 1 rise to the challenge. They succeed and accomplish great and remarkable things. And this wonderful light, a lofty light that is deeply connected to this world, will certainly, with Hashem’s help, also bring the coming of Moshiach and the building of the Third Beis Hamikdash, an everlasting building. This is truly what is meant by “Comfort, comfort My people”—a double comfort. Sitting here are distinguished women, activists who do their work faithfully and wholeheartedly. Let me introduce them one by one. We have our representative from Tzfas, Mrs. Rachel Landel, whom most of you surely know. She is a teacher and an activist, and anything I say would only detract. From Rishon LeZion, we have Mrs. Ruti Kaminker. People say her home is like a social welfare office; she is very active. We have our representative from Eilat, Mrs. Feigi Glickenstein, one of the founders of Shifra and Puah in Eilat and its main activist there. From Nachlas Har Chabad, we have Mrs. Rivka Cohen, an activist who makes many home visits and, again, accomplishes great and remarkable things. Next to her sits Mrs. Yehudis Garfi, a wonderful figure to us. She is a pharmacist in Nachlas Har Chabad, but she also prepares many other things and does a great deal of work beyond her job as a pharmacist, bringing Jewish women closer to their Father in Heaven. We will hear from her especially about the Chaya organization and how she manages to save Jewish lives. And last but not least is Mrs. Chana Abramowitz from the Krayot, who played a major part in organizing this symposium. Here again, Shifra and Puah is in her hands. She has a long and impressive record, and we will certainly be able to hear a great deal from her. We’ll move on to the questions. The first question I’d like to ask each of the women here is: How was the organization founded in your community, and how did it grow and develop? Mrs. Rachel Landel. Ah, Chana? All right, Chana. You’re not afraid, after all.

22:40 Speaker 2 I think it’s particularly fitting for me to open, because the organization in Kiryat Ata was founded in the home of Shoshana Rothenberg, the organizer of today’s conference. Shoshana was the first person who came to me and brought me back to Yiddishkeit. So after she also brought me under the chuppah and sent me north, it was only to be expected that we would establish a second generation of Shifra and Puah in Kiryat Ata.

23:08 Speaker 1 So perhaps you really can tell us how the organization was founded? You forgot.

23:11 Speaker 2 All right, that too. We heard about a woman who had given birth, and all we had money for was a bar of soap. So we brought her soap, and she told everyone that people from the organization had come to her. After that, it wasn’t hard to hold an event, because we had already given something. So we held an event and collected money. In Kiryat Ata there is a wonderful mix of people from every group and every walk of life—religious women of different kinds and nonreligious women. It doesn’t matter. In any case, everyone opened their pockets and their hearts, and we had a beginning. All the work at first was done by volunteers. Little by little, the funds began to cover professional help as well. As word spread, we were able to bring in more and more professionals, until we reached where we are today.

24:09 Speaker 1 Thank you. Rivka Cohen, please.

24:12 Speaker 11 When the Rebbe issued the call fourteen years ago, the organization was founded immediately, without any preparations. At first, we gave only cloth diapers and a shawl for the baby. But over time we improved: we switched to disposable diapers and began giving practical help to the mother as well. Usually, the parents of the women who give birth in our community live far away. So our new mothers really need a lot of help. Sometimes we even have to prepare a Shalom Zachor or a bris, and we provide whatever is needed—baby clothes and so on. These are the ordinary things we give within the neighborhood. But what is very, very important to us, and where we place our emphasis, is outside the neighborhood, outside Nachlas Har Chabad. We make many home visits; it is a regular part of our work. Women go out in pairs in the evening. You can come to Nachlas Har Chabad at eight or eight-thirty and see women leaving the neighborhood and going into Kiryat Malachi. We have a strong and extensive connection with the women outside the Chabad neighborhood in Kiryat Malachi. We go to all sorts of homes, knock on the door and say, “Mazel tov, we’re from Chabad.” They are so, so happy. Who better than us can appreciate a baby coming into the world? Not the nurse at the infant health clinic, not the doctor—no one else knows how to appreciate that a great soul has come down, that another Jewish soul has come into the world. Through the many home visits we’ve made outside the neighborhood—I don’t know how many by now—we open hearts. After that comes kashering kitchens. So from the home of Devorah Lerer, our chairwoman, a whole operation has developed: afterward, we have to go and kasher kitchens. Next week I’m supposed to teach one woman how to keep kosher. Once I’ve taught her, people will come and kasher her kitchen. Then she wants classes too, so we start classes in the new mother’s home.

26:04 Speaker 11 So, little by little—how do you say it? One mitzvah leads to another. People really, really appreciate it and tell their neighbors. We come and keep going, and I think this work of Shifra and Puah, these visits, brings a great light into Kiryat Malachi. We come into homes—you have no idea, no idea what kinds of homes we sometimes enter. I’ll never forget one. Sometimes a social worker even asks us to come. We arrived at one home—I was also six weeks after giving birth at the time—and there was nothing in the house. Not a chair, not a table. An empty kitchen. Nothing. A baby girl had just been born. There wasn’t even a father at home. The father was going back and forth between the hospital and prison—how do I put it? Prison. He was running from one to the other, and he didn’t even know he had a sweet new baby girl at home. The baby didn’t even have a crib. Nothing. She was lying across the sofa, and there were two other children in the house. We were simply frightened. It was already ten at night, and we couldn’t leave the house. But how do you get a crib for a baby in the middle of the night? You can’t leave such a sweet baby on the edge of the sofa. She could fall. Her siblings could easily knock her off. So we went back, got into the car, and thought: We can’t go to sleep when, G-d forbid, something might happen to this baby during the night. We can’t. So at ten-thirty, eleven, we went. Boruch Hashem, we have a storeroom now. We found a crib, quickly wiped it down, and brought not just the crib. Of course, for this home we got someone with a car to help us bring the crib, along with pillows and diapers, and quickly gathered some clothes. We stayed in touch with that family for years. Every month we brought them a food package, and we added fish and meat. We really had a connection with that family—sisters, a truly unfortunate, struggling family. That’s one of the stories, and there are many, many

27:53 Speaker 11 stories that—

27:54 Speaker 12 We’ll hear more later. Feigy, please.

27:59 Speaker 13 Well, we actually started our organization eight years ago. At the time there were just two families: ours and Rabbi Hecht’s family. We held a big Purim party and asked the women themselves to bring an item for an auction. They brought very nice gifts to sell, and they themselves bought the gifts. That’s how, with the proceeds from that evening, the Chabad women’s—sorry, the Shifra and Puah organization—got started. I wanted to briefly show how our organization has developed. At first we printed a greeting card with a blessing and practices worth following, along with Shir Hamaalos and another song. I won’t go into the details of the card right now. We reached dozens of the families closest to us. Then, to reach more people and expand our activities, we began taking attendance at the events we hold. These are generally very large events, with hundreds of women. We recorded who attended, and of course all the names went into a register. Afterward, we stayed in regular contact with them. And when they gave birth, we went to visit them at home. That way, we reach a larger number of women. Three years ago we decided to expand our activities, and in memory of the Rebbetzin we printed a new form, with somewhat different content. In addition to the home visits, as I said earlier, we sent it to every woman who gave birth in the city. Every new mother receives a greeting card with Shir Hamaalos at home. Recently we decided to add something else and changed the card a little. It may not seem so important to you, but we added Modeh Ani and Shema, spelled out in full, as well as some practical advice on education, raising children, and encouraging childbirth. Today, every woman who gives birth also receives this card with Shir Hamaalos in the mail. In addition, it’s worth mentioning that today we reach, as

30:16 Speaker 13 you said, quite a large number of women. The Chabad women who know them go to visit them at home. For us, the main thing is, of course, the conversation; the gift we bring is very modest. We’ll talk about that later.

30:34 Speaker 14 Thank you. Our representative from Rishon, Ruti, please.

30:38 Speaker 15 Well, first of all, I was told over the phone that I have a minute and a half on the clock, so I’ve really tried to keep it short.

30:45 Speaker 14 Absolutely.

30:45 Speaker 15 So I’ll get straight to the point.

30:46 Speaker 14 I’ll appreciate that, too.

30:49 Speaker 15 Ten years ago, the chairwoman of our organization, Esther Horowitz, gave birth and received cloth diapers from Kfar Chabad. As she tells it, she was very, very moved. It had a very positive effect on her, and she invited two more women to join her. Later Shoshana Solomon joined her, and little by little they added cradles and whatever else was needed. Each woman gradually added something. It was very, very hard—not like the example we’ve heard. We’re very spread out. We aren’t all together in one place like in Kfar Chabad; each of us is at a different end of town, and there are many, many women becoming involved. But every beginning is hard. Afterward it becomes much easier. I’ll tell you more in response to the next questions.

31:29 Speaker 14 Thank you. And Rachel Andel, please. When, how, and under what circumstances did your organization come into being?

31:36 Speaker 16 The truth is, it simply grew out of a need. We actually began helping women after childbirth when we arrived in Tzfas eighteen years ago. When the organization was established in Kfar Chabad fourteen years ago, we made ours more formal. Mrs. Sarah Levanoni was still with us then, and perhaps things were a little different for us in Tzfas. We wanted to bring diapers to new mothers, but there was no company supplying them. So we took the initiative. We suggested to someone in Tzfas that it would be worthwhile for him to start a diaper business. He did, and he tried it for several years, which helped us. We brought gifts as well, and it was simply for the women in our growing neighborhood. Over time we expanded into Tzfas itself. Really, when you visit a new mother to give her something small, it’s a very, very good time to have a positive influence on her regarding family purity. We also managed to obtain the lists from the hospital, and that’s how we expanded the organization. At present, the organization is particularly active in the Chabad neighborhood, which already has about two hundred families, and boruch Hashem it continues to grow.

32:48 Speaker 17 Very good. Rachel, perhaps you’ve already answered the second question too: How do you find out about a woman who has given birth? We have an organization—now how do we reach the new mother?

32:56 Speaker 16 In the Chabad neighborhood of Tzfas, it’s easier than in other places because we’re concentrated in one area. But as we heard throughout the first part of our study day today, we’re also very active in helping women during labor. Mrs. Brini Popack is here with us now. She didn’t want to come up here, so I’m speaking for them. She gets a phone call from a woman who is about to give birth, so she knows about her. That’s usually how we first hear about a new mother. We have four women who go with mothers to help them during labor.

33:34 Speaker 17 You mean in the neighborhood.

33:35 Speaker 16 In the neighborhood. And even if a woman hasn’t asked for help during labor, her husband usually comes to Rebbetzin Fridsky to ask for food for his wife. So we find out right away. In the rest of Tzfas, it was a little difficult for us to get addresses. We simply went to the maternity ward and asked the head of the ward and the hospital director to give us the list, because we didn’t want to do anything wrong—only visit new mothers at home. We received the lists and went according to them.

34:08 Speaker 17 Thank you. Ruti, please.

34:11 Speaker 18 We get information from the women, by word of mouth. We also get it from the Mother and Child clinic. One clinic gives us information. And in exceptional cases, the municipal welfare department gives us information about people who need our help.

34:26 Speaker 17 Thank you. Feigy, please. How do you find out about a new mother?

34:31 Speaker 3 There’s no problem with the maternity ward. Every week we receive the complete list of new mothers, regularly and without any difficulties, boruch Hashem.

34:39 Speaker 17 Thank you. Nachlas Har Chabad.

34:41 Speaker 4 In our neighborhood, the husband calls or a neighbor lets us know. If we see that no one has told us, the chairwoman picks up the phone herself. And if the woman doesn’t want help, she persuades her: “Accept some help—if not this, then that.” She offers her various things and really encourages her to accept the help we think she needs. Outside the neighborhood, we hear through neighbors or through women who already know Shifra and Puah, through the women’s classes. We have many classes for women in Nachlas Har Chabad. Very little comes through the Mother and Child clinic; that’s very rare. Those are only very exceptional cases that really need to be handled together with the welfare department. And we do encounter various cases, as I said, that are truly very unusual.

35:20 Speaker 17 Chana, ... Krayot, how do you find out?

35:24 Speaker 5 I’m from Kiryat Ata, yes—not from the Krayot.

35:27 Speaker 17 On its own.

35:27 Speaker 5 Kiryat Ata on its own. The Krayot need... No, no. The Krayot are doing very well. My husband says there’s no point in my answering the phone, because it’s going to be for me anyway. So the phone simply rings all day with news of births. Nothing official; people just let us know. In Kiryat Ata, word gets to us through anash or directly to our home. It works out.

35:52 Speaker 17 Good, Chana, keep holding the microphone. What are the criteria for how much help a new mother receives?

36:00 Speaker 5 Not long ago, someone told me that a woman wanted to sue us because she hadn’t received help after her first birth. There are no criteria. Whoever turns to us gets help. It’s as simple as that.

36:12 Speaker 17 Rivka, please. Nachlas Har Chabad.

36:14 Speaker 4 In our neighborhood, every new mother gets diapers—three packages, and another package if she has other small children. Twelve hours of help cleaning the house, twelve hours of cooking, twelve hours of childcare, and an interest-free loan of a thousand shekels, repaid at a hundred shekels a month. In other words, very favorable terms. And equipment, too: a cradle, a stroller, and a contribution toward a convalescent home. The contribution toward the convalescent home depends on the number of children.

36:45 Speaker 5 I want to say that she makes it all sound so easy. I remember my own most recent birth. I came home completely worn out, drained, with no strength left after two days in the delivery room. It wasn’t an easy situation. And suddenly, criteria or no criteria, our chairwoman, Dova, came in. She’s so modest that she doesn’t want to come up on stage, but I think she deserves a round of applause for all the devoted work she does. With such a radiant smile, she said to me, “Whatever you need.” What about Shabbos? My bris was going to be on Shabbos. She handles it all so effortlessly. There’s a shalom zachar to arrange, and a bris for the whole family, and places for everyone to stay, and what else? Suddenly everything was arranged, everything was clean, and the cradle was there. How could I not at least give her the honor of being the kvatter? And what I’m describing is really just a tiny part of it. It’s so heartwarming when you’re so weak, your mind isn’t working or taking anything in, and you don’t know what to do. Suddenly people come, and everything is arranged, organized, and taken care of, all so calmly—as though she hasn’t done a thing at all. I also happen to live next door, and I want to tell you what goes on there: the knocks at the door, the cradles outside the door, the rolls of tape they keep asking people to send from America. A lot of things come through my children, who help tape up the torn strollers. There are always repairs, hammers, all sorts of things. All day long, they’re carrying things and bringing things, endlessly. So yes, there are criteria, but I think it’s done with a tremendous amount of heart and warmth. Feigy, please, what are your criteria?

38:22 Speaker 6 We don’t have criteria either. We offer a small amount of help to every woman we know—that’s about three or four hundred women in the city. They receive a gift that includes a package of sixty diapers, a greeting card with Shir Hamaalos, as I said, and of course a home visit, which is the main thing, as well as informational material on various Jewish topics. We also lend out beds, strollers, playpens, as every other branch does. All this is for women who aren’t especially close to us, just women we know in the city. For anash and the women closest to us—and here I mean women who are really part of anash, about ten more women besides the fifteen anash families—we try very hard to emulate, at least in some way, the extensive work done in Kfar Chabad and Nachlas Har Chabad. They receive two packages of diapers and help. First of all, of course, we can’t eat in the hospital, so the new mother receives food. At the very least, it saves her husband from having to prepare food at the hospital.

39:37 Speaker 5 Feigy, perhaps you could tell us who cooks?

39:39 Speaker 6 What?

39:39 Speaker 5 Who cooks? You’re not telling us.

39:40 Speaker 6 We do it ourselves. We divide it up among us; we don’t have many women helping.

39:43 Speaker 5 With so many births, with so many births.

39:45 Speaker 6 No, really, we share the responsibility for it.

39:48 Speaker 5 Really, it’s nothing. Yes.

39:49 Speaker 6 No, I’m saying, it’s only for those closest to us. I even babysit.

39:52 Speaker 5 Yes.

39:53 Speaker 6 The meal at the hospital is only for those closest to us. Here, we really try to help as much as we can, as much as we’re able. Each of the women cooks something, bakes something, brings something. We try to emulate the bigger branches, but we’re still small.

40:09 Speaker 5 Rishon, Ruti, what are your criteria?

40:12 Speaker 7 Well, we’re the same as everyone else. Not for a first birth; after that, each new mother gets as much as she needs. And of course there are exceptional cases where they receive much more.

40:21 Speaker 5 So we’ll hear more about that—

40:22 Speaker 6 We’ll hear about that in the next question.

40:23 Speaker 5 Yes. Rachel, please.

40:28 Speaker 8 Our criteria for help vary. In Kiryat Chabad, there’s more extensive help, and in the city, as I told you, we go by the list. It makes no difference whether it’s a first, second, or third birth. Perhaps the gift is bigger for a tenth birth, but otherwise it’s all the same.

40:42 Speaker 5 So perhaps you could take this opportunity to tell us what help a new mother actually receives?

40:50 Speaker 8 The first thing she needs is food. That was a problem for us because we don’t have a soup kitchen. At first, when we weren’t yet a hundred or two hundred families, we cooked as we heard they do in Eilat. We would find a volunteer who was a neighbor or someone close to her, and she would cook for the family. Then, gradually, another arrangement took shape. We asked the cook at Beis Chana to cook for us for pay. Now we have frozen meals: she cooks a large quantity, we have a dedicated freezer, and frozen meals are delivered to the new mother and her family for a week at a nominal cost. She also gets two packages of diapers. We have a storeroom of cradles; that, too, was built up gradually. We also have strollers, beds, and a double stroller to lend out. Something very important and very active with us is help with cleaning. That isn’t easy either, as she said. The woman who organizes it has to find replacements for the cleaners and so on. Every new mother gets fourteen hours of cleaning. If she had a cesarean delivery, she gets twice that, and for later births she also gets more hours. Every mother also gets two weeks of childcare: girls help her at home or take the children outside so she can rest. And she gets a gift, too. In Tzfas, outside Kiryat Chabad, we just come for a visit with a gift for the new mother. Sometimes more help follows, but generally those are the criteria.

42:24 Speaker 5 Ruti, please. What help do you actually provide?

42:27 Speaker 7 Well, we’re able to provide quite a bit more. They receive food for two Shabbosos from the soup kitchen in Kfar Chabad, a housekeeper for two weeks, and a babysitter for three weeks. Two packages of diapers, a cake for Shabbos, cradles to borrow, and a Shir Hamaalos keepsake featuring our design. For women who don’t observe Torah and mitzvos, we come with a cake, two candles, a tzedakah box, an explanation, and a home visit. There are cases where we need to give those women more, too. And in Rishon, boruch Hashem, a great many new immigrants are arriving. They’ve been referred to us, and we try to give as much as we can. Sometimes we get a call from Kfar Chabad about a Russian new mother who needs help, or a referral through the welfare office I mentioned earlier, and we need to give more than tzedakah boxes. So we give each new mother whatever we can, according to her individual situation. That’s basically what we do.

43:31 Speaker 5 Feigy, what do you provide?

43:34 Speaker 9 I did list it. Should I go through it again?

43:37 Speaker 5 Yes.

43:38 Speaker 9 All right. As I said, every new mother receives a gift: diapers, informational material, a greeting card and Shir Hamaalos, along with a home visit, which gives us a chance to talk, and also equipment and clothing for feeding. That’s for every new mother. Our own new mothers—the Chabad women and about ten others who are closest to us—receive more help. That means a one-time housecleaning, too. We don’t have babysitters; we simply take the children ourselves from...

44:12 Speaker 5 Good.

44:13 Speaker 9 ...one another, and try to help.

44:16 Speaker 5 Rivka, as someone from Nachlas Har Chabad, I’m going to interrupt you, because your list is long. So just a brief overview, because this program is going to cover everything here.

44:25 Speaker 10 Okay. Since we place a very strong emphasis on women outside Nachlas Har Chabad, at every home visit each woman receives a tzedakah box and My Siddur, and they’re very, very excited about it. Sometimes the grandfather and grandmother are there too, and everyone looks through the siddur and says, “The Torah was commanded to us.” It’s so moving to see how everyone enjoys the siddur. We immediately explain about the tzedakah boxes and how to hang one in the kitchen—it really becomes a tzedakah campaign, and so on. Now, what does each family actually receive? Each family receives what she needs. If she doesn’t need so much help with cleaning because she manages that herself, she gets more help with cooking. We’re very flexible. If she prefers help with cooking, she gets more of that. One woman just said, “I only need a babysitter. Don’t bring me cooked food; I manage the cooking and cleaning.” So she’s getting three times as much babysitting—enough to have a babysitter at home for a whole month. Now, there are exceptional cases: a woman who already has ten children, or twins, or some crisis at home. We’re very, very flexible, and we give her much, much more. We also have a food fund. If we’re in a home, whether in Nachlas Har Chabad or outside it, and we see that the house is empty, we know we need to stock it with food every month. If we see that the family is short on clothing, we