The Outpost In Oklahoma: Rabbi Yehuda & Etel Weg

00:00 Speaker 1 On Sunday, November 26, 2019, I opened my laptop to watch the live broadcast of the gala banquet of the Kinus Hashluchim, the annual gathering of thousands of rabbis who serve as Chabad emissaries to reconnect and recharge over the course of a few days in New York.

00:20 Speaker 2 There are so many Jewish souls that are looking for a door, an expression, a Torah class, a mezuzah, Jewish friend.

00:29 Speaker 1 One of the videos shown to those in attendance, and to online viewers all around the world, was one featuring the challenges faced by four Chabad emissaries, including Rabbis Zev Stefel in Slovakia, Menachem Kitrick in Istanbul, and Yitzchak Shochet in London. Their stories were riveting.

00:50 Speaker 3 It was always my dream to go on Shlichus, even when I was a young child.

00:55 Speaker 1 But the one that really touched me was the story told by Rabbi Yehuda Weg in Tulsa, Oklahoma. He described some of the challenges of outreach in a part of the country with no Yiddishkeit. I was expecting a long list of the difficulties he faced, but what I heard was something else.

01:15 Speaker 3 What more do I want? You have no idea how happy I am. I'm, I'm, I'm controlling myself. I want to dance right now. I'm a very, very grateful person.

01:27 Speaker 1 Weg's tearful gratitude pierced my heart, because it seemed to me that he was grateful not in spite of the challenges he and his wife, Edel, have experienced, but because of them. I recently reached out to Weg to ask him to elaborate on that. He responded with a tapestry of stories that clearly demonstrates how spreading Yiddishkeit in America's heartland is a matter of the heart for him, for his family, and for the Lubavitcher Rebbe. I'm Gary Wolak, and this is Lamplighters, stories from Chabad emissaries on the Jewish frontier. Life as a Chabad emissary is often joyous, but it can be unpredictable, and even dangerous. Chabad has become a ubiquitous presence in every corner of the world, but behind every Chabad house are emissaries, regular people striving to transcend their circumstances, and a community that supports and relies on them. These are their stories. This Lamplighters episode is dedicated by Joseph Bacal in honor of his parents, Glenn and Amy Bacal. Thank you very much, Joseph, for supporting us in our mission to bring you inspiring stories of Chabad emissaries all over the world. Joseph chose a very auspicious episode to dedicate, because this is episode 50 of Lamplighters. Amazing. But we won't celebrate that milestone for too long. There are about 5,000 Chabad emissary families in more than 100 countries. So 50 episodes down, only 4,950 to go. To keep our series going strong, please consider dedicating one. Email us podcast@lubavitch.com to explore dedication opportunities. That's podcast@lubavitch.com. To subscribe digitally to Lubavitch International Magazine, or to

03:36 Speaker 1 receive it at your doorstep, please visit lubavitch.com/subscribe. You might say that Rabbi Yehuda Weg's life path began unwinding before him from the very beginning.

03:55 Speaker 3 I grew up in Crown Heights. My parents were very anxious for me to go on Shlichus, so I grew up always thinking about Shlichus.

04:04 Speaker 1 But where would that be? While still in yeshiva, Weg had done some outreach in Los Angeles, but after yeshiva he went somewhere very different, albeit every bit as important.

04:19 Speaker 3 To Indiana, and that opened a whole new world to me. I got to see very isolated places, very small places. Indianapolis was our base, but we went to every city in Indiana, and I got to see what it means to have cows in your face, and to see how corn grows, and doesn't come in a plastic package. So I got to see a different side of spreading Yiddishkeit.

04:46 Speaker 1 Weg also tried northern California, but decided that small-town America was his cup of tea. But before he could go anywhere, Weg needed to find his life partner.

04:58 Speaker 4 I'm not sure if I had heard of Oklahoma. I grew up in England.

05:02 Speaker 1 That's Edel Weg. She married Rabbi Yehuda in 1986. They had already discussed what type of place they wanted to work in.

05:11 Speaker 3 I particularly wanted a place that didn't have Yiddishkeit, didn't have options as far as Judaism was concerned before I got there. That was my dream, to be able to go to a place that actually didn't have anything to offer.

05:27 Speaker 1 The young couple just hadn't talked about the specifics.

05:30 Speaker 3 And I, I thought that I was, you know, I was a tough guy. I was ready to go on Shlichus just about anywhere, and she put me in my place. She told me, "If the Rebbe sends us, what's the difference where?"

05:42 Speaker 1 Weg says his wife was correct, even if that meant going to a big city. But one day, while he was in kollel, Weg was told that Rabbi Moshe Kotlarsky at the Merkos office was looking for him. According to Weg, that's code for, "You're wanted for Shlichus."

06:01 Speaker 3 And I went to Rabbi Kotlarsky's office. At that time, on the table, he said, uh, was Hawaii ... and Oklahoma, and he knew me a little. He said, "You're not for Hawaii. Just go to Oklahoma, okay?"

06:14 Speaker 1 People had been asking Rabbi Kotlarsky to send shluchim, and the Rebbe had been emphasizing the need to send emissaries to new areas. So the decision was made. Rabbi Yehuda and Rebbetzin Ethel Weg moved to Tulsa permanently after Pesach in 1987.

06:32 Speaker 3 Where exactly is it? I pulled out a World Book Encyclopedia, and I looked up Oklahoma. Uh, so I learned a little about Oklahoma before I came, but not much.

06:42 Speaker 4 There was no shluchim here.

06:44 Speaker 3 We were very fortunate in that the Rebbe chose us, and that we were able to go to a place that otherwise did not have Yiddishkeit.

06:53 Speaker 1 But as the Wegs would soon learn-

06:55 Speaker 4 It has challenges, but I always say it's good that we go when we're very young. We learn on the job, you know?

07:05 Speaker 3 We were very much a fish out of water. Uh, we were a Hasidic couple hoping to raise a Hasidic family. We came here knowing in advance that we would not have a place for our children to go to school. Kosher food would be a challenge. Mikvah would be a challenge. Most of the things that most Orthodox Jews are used to are actually a challenge over here in Oklahoma. So our arrival over here was quite a culture shock, and I was not very happy. I'll be very honest with you, I was not very happy because when I was in 770, when I was growing up, I was very much part of the hoo-ha, as it's referred to. I was one of the boys, very much, and suddenly I was totally isolated. So the glamour of going on shlichus lasted about 24 hours. After that it was not easy.

08:06 Speaker 1 Rabbi Weg estimates that in 1987 there were fewer than 3,000 Jews in Tulsa, and fewer than 6,000 in the entire state. But the Wegs set out to find them and learn what they needed.

08:23 Speaker 3 The kind of people that we found were very much the salt of the earth. They were very serious, but they knew very little about Yiddishkeit, very little about Judaism. But, you know, my wife was completely dedicated to it, I was dedicated to it, and we made it work.

08:40 Speaker 1 Here's how they did that. The Wegs began with that staple of Jewish outreach, the Shabbos meal. Ethel remembers their very first Shabbos guest.

08:50 Speaker 4 A psychologist, psychiatrist. He was about an hour, maybe an hour and 15 minutes away on an Indian reservation. A nice Jewish boy from Queens.

08:58 Speaker 1 Getting kosher chicken for themselves and their guests was one challenge. Another was that the Wegs didn't yet have beds for stayover guests, which in this case included the man's non-Jewish fiancee.

09:12 Speaker 4 I think my husband went out that Friday morning to order beds.

09:16 Speaker 1 But an interesting thing resulted from that first Shabbos meal. The man started to come regularly for prayer services, and he observed the mitzvah of tefillin. His fiancee noticed.

09:29 Speaker 4 And he, Baruch Hashem, was so changed that one day she said, "I don't know who you are. You're not the man I know. Goodbye." And that was it. And Baruch Hashem, he moved to Poughkeepsie, New York and he met a beautiful Jewish woman. They have grandchildren already from... They live in Monsey.

09:46 Speaker 1 But more often than not, Rabbi Weg had to go out to find Oklahoma's Jews.

09:51 Speaker 3 I made it my business to travel to various different cities. Among the people that we heard about was a woman from Morocco that lived in Maysville, Oklahoma. It was such a small place that I couldn't find it on the map.

10:05 Speaker 1 Weg did find it eventually. It's about a two-and-a-half-hour drive southwest of Tulsa. Did Weg say it was a small place? Well, not small for rural Oklahoma.

10:17 Speaker 3 This town was a large town because it had two gas stations rather than one. Anyway, I pulled in, and I walked into the first gas station that I found, and it got silent. The question that they had in their mind was, "What's a guy like this doing over here? He's obviously not one of us." "Uh, you ain't from around here, boy." Anyway, I walked over to the counter, and they literally froze. And I said, "Do you know a woman by this and this first name who lives in town? And she comes from Morocco," and I- I- I told them, uh, pretty much everything that I knew. And they told me, "We don't know who it is, but the policeman around the corner would know who it is. Why don't you go to the police station?" I went to the police station. It was about 5:00 in the afternoon. It was closed. That's how small a town it was, that the police station was closed. And I went to the second gas station, and the woman behind the counter said, "My grandmother knows everybody in town. Let me call her."

11:23 Speaker 1 Weg got the number of the Moroccan woman he was looking for. Soon he was on the phone with her.

11:29 Speaker 3 I said, "I'm a rabbi. I'm visiting Jewish people here in town." She said, "Where are you?" I said, "I'm at this and this gas station." She said, "Don't move. I'll be there. I live a little out of town, but I'll be there shortly. Don't move." And I'd been thinking the whole entire time that I was waiting for her to show up, "What am I doing here? I'm a yeshiva bachur from Brooklyn, and what am I doing in Maysville, Oklahoma, waiting for this woman?" And she drove, you know, all the way with her husband, who was very, very upset that after all these years she was making a connection, a Jewish connection.

12:14 Speaker 1 Weg remembers that the woman was in her 80s. She arrived in a big red pickup truck. She jumped out and ran to him and told him, "My family has come for me."

12:25 Speaker 3 She said, "Who sent you?" And I said, "This is what the Rebbe wants. The Rebbe wants us to meet every single Jew. The Rebbe sent me." I don't think she understood exactly what a Rebbe was and, and so on, but she accepted the answer that the Rebbe sent me. She said, "You have to come to my house."

12:42 Speaker 1 There, Rabbi Weg learned that she had left Morocco after World War II when she was young.

12:48 Speaker 3 All that she could remember was Kippur. She remembered Yom Kippur. The place that she came from in Morocco, they called it Kippur. She said, "Oh, I remember we spent a whole month, and we would sweep the floors, and we would sweep out the crumbs and, and so on, and we'd clean up the whole house." So when I said Pesach, she said, "Yeah, yeah, Pesach." Wow, she remembered. I said matzah. She said, "That's what we ate for the entire eight days. We ate only matzah. We didn't eat any bread." So she did remember, but it took my jogging her memory to get her to remember, and she got involved in Jewish guide, she and her children and, uh, so on. That story, in a sense, defines exactly why we're here.

13:34 Speaker 1 The Wegs are not just there for Jews living in remote Oklahoman outposts or tribal reservations. Most of their work is on behalf of Jews living and working in Tulsa, like Howard Berkson, a Tulsa lawyer who, in his words, specializes in suing people. I promise him that I'll stay on his good side throughout my conversation with him, and I ask him about his Jewish background.

13:59 Speaker 5 We didn't keep kosher at home, but we lit candles every Friday and then went about doing whatever we were gonna do anyway. So there was this mystery of, why do we do that? What is this for?

14:12 Speaker 1 Berkson grew up and went to school in different parts of the Midwest and West Coast. He says he grew up with a watered-down version of Judaism.

14:20 Speaker 5 And the story of Judaism in my life picks up, like, 25 years later.

14:25 Speaker 1 That story began when he came to Tulsa to study law about 15 years ago.

14:31 Speaker 5 I was not doing anything Jewish. I wasn't lighting candles or thinking about what food I put in my mouth or what words came out of it.

14:39 Speaker 1 Berkson was married with a son with whom he became involved in a different Tulsa Jewish congregation.

14:46 Speaker 5 I didn't know anything about Chabad. I'd never heard of them

14:48 Speaker 1 Until one day in 2013 or so when he decided to take a Torah class with Rabbi Weg.

14:55 Speaker 5 This was a course about the Rebbe, and it had a lot of video of him, and all of these video outtakes of and about the Rebbe was very inspirational. Rabbi Weg, who takes his teaching very seriously, is always well-prepared, handles questions and answers very effectively, and the fact that he knew the Rebbe personally, this is a very holy guy.

15:25 Speaker 1 Not long after that first class, Weg called Berkson to ask if he could help make a minyan.

15:31 Speaker 5 And I went to Chabad House, and I realized that there was something going on here that was different, that reached into me. All of this, uh, kavanah, all of this focus and intent and love of Hashem, I didn't catch that vibe in other places that I, I had been, and it just made me think I, you know, I've been going to the wrong place.

15:54 Speaker 3 And then he started to come on a regular basis, uh, to the synagogue and to the minyan and so on. Eventually, he started to put on tefillin every day.

16:04 Speaker 1 That led to more learning, which led to more mitzvahs. Berkson says he's still learning and growing.

16:10 Speaker 5 100%. I'm actually gonna take up lessons in Tanya with the rabbi's son. You know, I bought a lot more books. I read a lot more books. Every year, I learn more. I try to do more and try and get it in my life.

16:24 Speaker 1 Ethel Weg has noticed Berkson's efforts and the positive results.

16:29 Speaker 4 He was going a few months ago to visit his elderly parents in Champaign, Illinois, and he was going on a motorcycle, so he said he's very careful about saying the traveler's prayer. That's what he told me. I mean, these are big moments, when I hear people speaking like that.

16:45 Speaker 5 To undertake a mitzvah, especially if it's one I wasn't even aware of before, actually gives me a sense of pride. I'm doing this, and I'm doing it right.

16:59 Speaker 1 The Wegs say that the incredible diversity of Tulsa's Jewish community keeps them on their toes.

17:06 Speaker 3 Up until about 10 years ago, we had virtually no religious Jews coming through Oklahoma. But about 10 years ago, because of a specific program that the city offers, we've had nonstop religious people, and, and they run the gamut from a shtreimel to black hat to a kippah sruga to a knitted yarmulke.

17:27 Speaker 1 That program is called Tulsa Tomorrow, run by a Jewish organization that introduces young Jewish adults and families to visit Tulsa with the aim of attracting them to move there permanently. The Wegs have met many of them.

17:41 Speaker 3 And we've dealt with each one based on their needs, and that's very important to us. And, uh, we've serviced each and every one of them to the best of our ability.

17:52 Speaker 1 Even if they were wearing a cowboy hat and boots?

17:55 Speaker 3 Makes no difference whatsoever. It could be a cowboy hat. Could be no hat at all. It really doesn't make a difference what they serve me that day. And we live quite an adventure.

18:10 Speaker 1 Sometimes that daily adventure means operating as an emergency landing spot. For folks who might normally think of Oklahoma as flyover country, Joseph Bacal is an attorney for the Arizona Attorney General's office. He lives in Phoenix.

18:26 Speaker 6 My family was, I would probably term it traditional. We lit Shabbos candles. We went to High Holiday services, always did a Seder, Hanukkah. I had a basic Jewish education.

18:40 Speaker 1 But when Bacal was in law school, he read a biography of the Lubavitcher Rebbe by Rabbi Joseph Telushkin, which interested him in Chabad. He began attending Phoenix-area Chabad centers about six years ago, and he's become very involved in Jewish life. In January 2023, he attended a Shabbaton in Crown Heights.

19:02 Speaker 6 It was a blast to get, like, a little preview of, uh, 770, the Ohel, mikvahs, kosher supermarkets, what have you.

19:11 Speaker 1 Bacal returned to Crown Heights in September 2024 to have his tefillin checked and to talk with a matchmaker. This time, he went during the week and planned to fly back home to Phoenix on a Friday.

19:25 Speaker 6 Friday travel's always a little anxious, but I was like, "I'll be back early enough."

19:30 Speaker 1 Red flag. Red flag.

19:34 Speaker 6 Yeah, red flag. Red flag.

19:37 Speaker 1 Bacal says that about two hours into the flight, the pilot got on the intercom to say that there was a mechanical issue that would force them to land in Tulsa. Bacal began to worry about what he would do if he was stranded in Tulsa on Shabbos. When he and his fellow passengers were safely on the ground, Bacal looked up the closest Chabad House and gave Rabbi Yehuda Weg a call.

20:01 Speaker 3 And I told him, "By all means, he's welcome to stay here for Shabbos. We have several rooms that are specifically for people to come by and use for Shabbos."

20:12 Speaker 1 Bacal says he was relieved to have that option open to him, but having to calculate sundown in two different time zones while monitoring text updates about the status of the plane took its toll. Rabbi Weg knew what to say.

20:27 Speaker 3 "Stop worrying. Stop worrying. You're in good hands. We have food for you. We have whatever you need." He said, "Okay, I will keep you updated."

20:35 Speaker 1 The mechanical issue was fixed, and Bacal and his fellow passengers re-boarded at 3:30 PM. He made it to Phoenix with time to spare before sundown and enjoyed Shabbos dinner with Rabbi Dov and Rebbetzin Mussie Levertov at Chabad of Phoenix. Bacal's only regret was not meeting Rabbi Weg in person. He says he'd like to someday. In the meantime, Bacal's careful guardianship of the Sabbath has taught him an important lesson.

21:06 Speaker 6 Regardless of how a day is going, we all have the choice and the ability to do mitzvahs and to celebrate your connection with Hashem wherever you are.

21:19 Speaker 1 What the Wegs have established in Tulsa is impressive by any standard. Early on, they established a Talmud Torah for children. There are Torah studies classes for men and women, a mikvah, Shabbos services, minyanim during the week, and the Tulsa Mezuzah Project, a campaign run largely by their son Tzemach, who's affixed nearly 50 kosher mezuzahs on the doorposts of Jewish Sooners. Tzemach, who focuses on Tulsa's newer neighborhoods, is one of the three boys the Wegs raised in Tulsa.

21:53 Speaker 3 All of them so far have become shluchim, and we're extremely proud of that.

21:57 Speaker 1 The Wegs' oldest son, Mendy, is rabbi at Northwestern University just outside of Chicago, and Levi Weg serves at Chabad of Raleigh, North Carolina.

22:08 Speaker 3 So we're, we're extremely happy and, and very proud of them.

22:11 Speaker 1 Another facet of the Weg's Jewish outreach is one they didn't see coming at first. Tulsa offers one of the world's best eating disorder treatment centers. The Wegs have supported many patients there, mostly frum girls from communities all over, and their families.

22:29 Speaker 3 And we have been involved nonstop for about 10 years in providing for these people.

22:34 Speaker 1 The Wegs make Havdalah for the girls each week after Shabbos and support their visiting family members.

22:40 Speaker 3 So we grew with the need, a place to sleep, a place to eat. My wife, she has a very soft shoulder. They can talk to my wife anytime, and my wife listens. She has interminable patience to encourage them, uh, give them what they need in terms of getting through this illness. It's not an easy, uh, proposition, and it's something that we take very seriously.

23:10 Speaker 1 The Wegs say that's just another part of their incredibly varied work. They learned 37 years ago that they needed to be flexible enough to provide Jewish support where it was most needed, even as Tulsa's Jewish demographics changed, sometimes drastically.

23:27 Speaker 3 I didn't know what a five-year plan was. I didn't know what a 10-year plan was. So now I found out. Okay. But it has remained very fluid. I don't know what Tulsa's gonna look like in 10 or 20 years from now, but I will be here, and I will serve the needs of the community as they change.

23:47 Speaker 4 Moshiach isn't here yet. It's not the end of the story. We have work to do. We're given a lot of opportunities, Baruch Hashem.

23:55 Speaker 3 So we will continue to assess the situation and provide for the needs of the people as time goes on.

24:02 Speaker 1 Rabbi Weg, I want to bring the conversation back to that video I saw five years ago at the Kinus, the one in which you became very emotional when you talked about how happy you were to be on shlichus. It seemed to me that you were happy not in spite of the challenges you faced over 37 years, but because of them. Do I have that right?

24:26 Speaker 3 You are very correct. Um, I couldn't have put it better myself. I relish those challenges because they mean that I'm on shlichus and that I have a connection to the Rebbe, and something that is meaningful to the Rebbe is the most important thing in my life. I'm very, very fortunate in, in the fact that my life's dream was fulfilled. It boggles my mind. It boggles my mind. When I get up in the morning and I say Modeh Ani, I thank God for restoring my soul, I have another opportunity to do shlichus. Basically, we do whatever needs to be done, and that's what will bring the Geulah. That will, that's, that's what will bring about the redemption. The more the challenges, the better.

25:29 Speaker 1 I'm Gary Wolk. Thanks for listening to Lamplighters, stories from Chabad emissaries on the Jewish frontier. We welcome your questions and comments about what you've just heard on Lamplighters. Please email us at podcast@lubavitch.com. And if you know of a great story involving Chabad emissaries or the people they inspire, please let us know about them. That's podcast@lubavitch.com. To subscribe digitally to Lubavitch International Magazine or to receive it at your doorstep, please visit lubavitch.com/subscribe. Lamplighters is a project of Machne Israel, the social services arm of Chabad Lubavitch.