Ep. 32: How To Be A 'Successful' Chossid with Rabbi Aron Kamman

00:00 Speaker 1 If you're looking and you're take a looking, the truth is accessible and you'll find the truth. For someone that's take a looking, I believe will get to that news. Haven't you see, I think you see the

00:11 Speaker 2 Come to Chassidus, come to Torah, come to Yiddishkeit. Every-everything else is empty. This is, this is the real stuff. That's the deepest, most real motivation for, for me to learn, for you to learn, for anyone to learn Torah. This is my HaRav Chaim. This is my guidebook for life.

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01:11 Speaker 2 Baruch Hashem. Good. How are you?

01:14 Speaker 1 Okay. Baruch Hashem. Thank you very much for being here all the way from Toronto. And I think we should begin the, with the

01:27 Speaker 2 You always have, uh, something to share and something on your mind. So maybe we'll talk, we'll, we'll start with that. How, how does that sound?

01:36 Speaker 1 Sure. That's to say that, uh, but maybe one step, one step before it says, uh, there's a

01:47 Speaker 2 Okay, like a real rabbi.

01:49 Speaker 1 I was just thinking to myself, you know, the whole idea over here of Chassidim coming together to, to do

01:54 Speaker 2 Is, did I kind of get it right?

02:01 Speaker 1 I would say so, for sure. It's, it's a different format and different style, but, uh, it might, it might even have some miles over traditional fabrengen, which I don't know if we have to discuss now. Maybe we discuss later.

02:13 Speaker 2 Right. But the recording and the pictures and the cameras and the microphones, the formalities of it is a little bit interesting. So it reminded me, there was a story circulating when they made the first recording of Nechayach, and they hired a Yid that was a professional, not a Lubavitcher, and he practiced with them, and he rented a studio in Manhattan, and he's

02:43 Speaker 1 Finally, like, mamash at the last minute, he's watching out the window. He sees huge group of Chassidim coming with women, with, with their, I guess, with their wives. He couldn't understand where they're going, where they're coming. And they all of a sudden, they all pile into the studio. And much more than the people, he had, like, I think sixteen people they were supposed to sing. And they start unpacking cake and mashke. He's like, "What's going on over here?" So, uh, they said, "What do you mean? We're making a fabrengen." So he says, "Now? Here? Like, why?" He says, "What do you mean? You think we're just singers coming, like, microphone and sing? This is the Rebbe's shlichus. We're coming here to spread the nigunei Chabad. So we have to

03:25 Speaker 2 You know, we have to get in the mode. And sure enough, they started fabrengen. He said, "When is it-- How long is this fabrengen?" He says, "As soon as it finishes, then it's over,

03:34 Speaker 1 So they start fabrengen, and then after they

03:38 Speaker 2 Then they went to the nigunim, and it wasn't stam gezungen and a microphone. It was with this

03:41 Speaker 1 So, um, somehow we have to rise above, you know, all the recordings. I see you have, you know, your astronaut things on there. I got a little bit of a smaller thing. To make it a fabrengen chayshe, I don't know, uh, virtually to zogn l'chaim or to sing a nigun. I don't know if the nigunim work, you know, over, over the internet. They might, you know, sometimes the nigunim crash into each other. But I'll kop an eye, I think what you said is good.

04:06 Speaker 2 Which is

04:08 Speaker 1 So that will be, uh, it's take a little bit of a strugen, but there will be a little bit of a

04:12 Speaker 2 So just a short vart, and you know, obviously it's in everyone's mind, the terrible ason, the tragedy that took place in Sydney, Yidden, including shluchim that were killed, a kiddush Hashem. So just a, a short thought. This was by a fabrengen not long after Yut Zrat Tofshan Yud, obviously a big ason for kilus Chabad, the Rebbe befrat. And when the Rebbe was fabrengen, this was obviously coming up throughout the fabrengens of Tofshan Yud. I think it was Shabbos Mevarchim Tammuz, the Rebbe was fabrengen still hemshch to that. If Yid gave a told him to fabrengen Shabbos Mevarchim, so there wasn't any official kabbalas on the siyas. And the Rebbe said a gishmeke vart on the berakhah, yichadeshehu, that we bench at the end of the mevarch mesach hedes. That we know that we say, "L'chaim u'l'shalom, l'sason u'l'simcha, l'shuva v'nechama vene'emar amen." But we say amen after each refrain. L'chaim u'l'shalom, we say amen, l'sason u'l'simcha, amen. L'shuva v'nechama vene'emar amen, we say amen again. The Rebbe asked a question on the nusach. If you're saying amen each time of these three phrases, so why only at the end does it say vene'emar amen? The Rebbe explained a gishmeke vart. When you say l'chaim u'l'shalom, you say l'sason u'l'simcha, these are tov and niv and nigla. You don't need encouragement to say amen. You hear that? Wow, amen, for sure. Everyone from zecher lain will, will scream amen. When you hear yeshuva v'nechama, what does it mean yeshuva v'nechama? Yeshuva v'nechama means that there was

05:39 Speaker 2 tza'ar, that there was yagen. There was something negative, but we're saying the Aibishter will give us a yeshuva v'nechama. When you hear that, this is not amen so easily. We need the shliach tzibura to push and to encourage chevra. Vene'emar, we have to say amen to that too. Why? We're anticipating a chodesh. We're anticipating a year. We hope for tov and niv and nigla. We don't hope for anything negative. But yet, we need to be pushed, and we have to say amen to that too. Because we know that even when there is something negative- The Ibishter is the one that's sending us Yeshuah and Rachamim. By the name of Amen, we all say amen to that, 'cause even when that situation does arise, we have the guarantee of the berakh of the Ibishter that it will be Yeshuah and Rachamim at the end. That's the word.

06:19 Speaker 1 Okay. So Amen. Amen.

06:26 Speaker 2 Regarding this situation and regarding the galus at large.

06:30 Speaker 1 For sure. Um, okay. So I think another way that we can, uh, dis-discuss is that I know that, uh, you know, we're brothers, but there's a age gap. You know, the Rebbe says, "Achicha hagadol." I'm not sure if it's only the oldest brother. You're not the oldest, but, uh... Or it's any older brothers. You know, maybe someone can send me, uh, if it's, uh, included all older brothers or not. But definitely, um, there's a lot that, you know, a big part due, due to our age gap, things that I heard from you and learned from you over the years. And, uh, one of the things is that we're born in the same family, but at very different times. I was born before Gematamos, but I grew up pretty much afterwards. And, uh, while you were not an older bachur, you were young, youngish, but definitely you had a different experience growing up with the Rebbe. Um, you know, uh, begolim before Gematamos. And maybe, uh, you can share some, uh, some, s-some of that with me.

07:42 Speaker 2 Okay, that's the plan. Uh, I, I do wanna say that I look a little bit older than I am because the Ibishter gave me a little bit more white. A lot of times people do think I'm the oldest because my beard is a little bit longer than all my brothers put together. Uh, you see the end, okay? So, uh, but I do have some memories. But I wanna backtrack, if I may, one step behind, because our collective memories are hemshekh to our father. Like you mentioned, we're brothers. It's true. I remember when you were born. You were born, uh, shortly before my bar mitzvah. Hey, alu, right? I got it right. And I was teshuah v'halutash u'nalu for my bar mitzvah. So-

08:18 Speaker 1 And I think when-

08:19 Speaker 2 Let's, let's go back

08:19 Speaker 1 ... I, I, I think, um, did you go to dollars be-- right before your bar mitzvah? Do you remember?

08:25 Speaker 2 I, I did. Now, I don't remember if it was mamish. It wasn't the day of my bar mitzvah was on a Sunday, if I remember correctly. You know, you could check the calendar. So I don't think I went that day. We were living in Monsey then. And, you know, the tiltul, uh, the day of the bar mitzvah, maybe if I would've been a bigger chassid, I would've went that day, but I think I went the week before, if I remember correctly.

08:44 Speaker 1 So what-- So what day is that? What's the math?

08:49 Speaker 2 Math will be for somebody else. I'm trying to remember the whole thing.

08:51 Speaker 1 No, because-- No, it w-- I, I could be it's that. I have to check the video, but I think it's during that dollars that, um, Tatty told the Rebbe that my wife just had a baby boy regarding me. I think it's probably that Sunday. Um, um, I, I have to look the video to see if you were there. I can imagine you were there. And, and the Rebbe said, "This is for your wife." Another dollar, and the Rebbe said, "Good news, bad nimtscharim."

09:17 Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah. I-

09:17 Speaker 1 So that was, uh... No, that's okay. It's probably in connection with bar mitzvah, although you, you had Yechidus also. So whatever.

09:22 Speaker 2 Yeah.

09:22 Speaker 1 Okay, go ahead.

09:23 Speaker 2 I'm not sure if that was the same time. The next day after my bar mitzvah, I was able to get an aliyah by the Rebbe on Monday. And, uh, obviously, that was a big part of my bar mitzvah. But again, backtracking, since we share fathers, so we could share this too. Really, our beginnings and our connection to the Rebbe begins with our father, our parents.

09:45 Speaker 1 And your, and your mother also, right?

09:46 Speaker 2 Mother, too, for sure. So I was always interested to know how did that story come about and how did Tatty, how did our father get connected to the Rebbe, to Chassidus, to Yiddishkeit? So I remember a few times hearing that he said that his brother, Uncle Shmuel, called him up. They were in different places, and he said, called him by his first name. He said, "What you've been looking for, you've been looking for all along, it's in your back pocket. You're looking for Ibishter, you're looking for the purpose in life, you're looking for a deeper meaning." And unfortunately, he didn't think to turn to Yiddishkeit because he thought spirituality and ruchnius and all the kus is elsewhere. And he told him, "No, no, what you're looking for is in your back pocket." So now I wanted to backtrack the story a little bit more. How did Uncle Shmuel come to the Rebbe? So I asked him, and he said, "Oh, our cousin, Levi Garbos, invited him, had an invitation."

10:32 Speaker 1 I spoke to him last night, by the way.

10:34 Speaker 2 Okay. Oh, I forgot about this. So he said he was in a-- he was a-- I forget where he was, and Levi calls him up and he says, he says, "Why don't you come to New York for the weekend?" Okay, that sounds interesting. He didn't tell him what he was coming for. Come to New York for the weekend. He thought, you know, it's a party, you know, whatever it is. And he comes to Crown Heights. What does he know the difference? You know, Manhattan, Brooklyn, same th-- you know, which place, which, uh, stop on the train to get off. And he comes, and Levi was then, I think, in Hadar Hatorah learning in yeshiva. So kind of quiet there. So the Shabbos, he's like, "Where's the party?" He says, "Oh, the party's tomorrow."

11:11 Speaker 1 Mm-hmm.

11:11 Speaker 2 The party was the Rebbe's farbrengen. And he comes to the Rebbe's farbrengens. He never saw such a thing in his life. Hidden and, you know, Chassidim, and he saw the emes push it from their faces shining. He saw the Rebbe, and it was a farbrengen, and people were helpful to, to a guest, and they gave him a place, and he was able to sit. Oh, he didn't understand a word, obviously. Not Yiddish, not Lashon Hakodesh. But I forget if he told me this was during the farbrengen or after the farbrengen. He pushed, burst out in tears. Push it, he was crying just unstopping tears. And Levi asked him, like, "Did you-- somebody say something to you? Did you get impacted by something by the farbrengen?" Like, he didn't, he didn't think anything really registered. He said, "No, I didn't understand a word. No, I didn't understand anything." "Okay, so, so what's going on?" He says, "I saw a human being for the first time in my life." That's how he described being by the Rebbe. Anyway, so behamshich to that, he invited Tatti to come. He said, "This is what you've been looking for." Now, by the way, one step back. I was trying to trace it back to the source. So now I wanna know, okay, so how did Levi Garbos end up by the Rebbe?

12:25 Speaker 1 Mm-hmm.

12:26 Speaker 2 So if I remember correctly, I'm saying things from what I heard conversations-

12:28 Speaker 1 Yeah, by the way, uh, Levi Garbos might have to come on and correct us, but yeah, go ahead.

12:32 Speaker 2 Okay. Okay. I might be, I might be mixing it up a little bit, but if I understand correctly, he was reading Yiddish literature, and he was very enamored by the shtetl. The shtetl, he wanted to see this shtetl, and it was in the books, not, not live. So he heard that in New York, it's been recreated. So he wants to find the shtetl. He wants to be in the shtetl. So he comes to the Lower East Side, and he's schmoozing with guys, and he goes into a store, and there's a Hasid, not a Lubavitch Hasid, you know, with a levush. And he says he wants to come to the shtetl. So this guy looks at him, "What am I gonna do with this guy?" So he says, you know, "What do you do when such a person comes to you?" You send him to a Lubavitcher.

13:11 Speaker 1 No. No, I have to correct you because this is what I know.

13:14 Speaker 2 You sure?

13:15 Speaker 1 It wasn't-- It was-- Yeah. He walked into Leibel Behrinsky's store.

13:18 Speaker 2 No, no, I'm getting there.

13:20 Speaker 1 Oh, okay. Sorry.

13:20 Speaker 2 I'm, I'm before that.

13:22 Speaker 1 Okay.

13:22 Speaker 2 How did, how did he get to Leibel Behrinsky's store?

13:25 Speaker 1 Okay.

13:25 Speaker 2 This other Hasid didn't know what to do with this Yid that doesn't look like he has any shai'os to frumkeit and Yiddishkeit, and he wants to discover Yiddishkeit in the shtetl. So he sent him to Leibel Behrinsky's store.

13:36 Speaker 1 Okay.

13:36 Speaker 2 And when he went to Leibel Behrinsky's store, he sent him to a Lubavitcher. And the Lubavitcher set him up for Shabbos, and I don't know all the details after that, but that's how he got exposed to... So here you have three people. Listen to it for a moment. You have three people that are looking. They're searching. One is looking for the shtetl, which is his way of looking for his neshamah, for Yiddishkeit, for the Emes. Another person is looking for humanity. Uncle Shmuel, you know, had-- didn't have the easiest life. You know, he maybe saw a lot of Behemoth on two feet, and now he sees humanity. He sees Anusuis. He sees Menschlichkeit. He sees realness. Tat-- You know, Tatti's looking for touching the infinite, grabbing Eilen saf somehow. And they're all searching for the Emes in their way, and that's what led them to the Rebbe. So what I think when I think about these ideas is that, you know, we as born Lubavitchers have to also begin that search, and not just begin it 'cause we're already in the middle of it, but to continue the search, and that's going to make our iskashes that much more real. Our Avodas Hashem, that much more real. Interestingly enough, I remember Tatti once told me, he said that, you know, after he hears all these stories coming out of people's interactions with the Rebbe, they put a lot of times on video, my story, my encounter. Like, why did I listen to all the instructions

17:01 Speaker 2 of my mashpia, my rosh yeshivas to just come to Yechidus and not say anything and just put my taitel? I should have told the Rebbe who I am, what's going on with, uh... You know, a similar idea, but you know, obviously more in an adult way. And if, if you can say, like you mentioned, before Gematamos, after Gematamos, and you mentioned that you were, you know, too young to process it. I was also too young to process it. And I don't know if people that were older than me also were necessarily old enough. Years are not just measured by the passport to process and to appreciate. And I could say for myself, and it's very applicable today to everyone, uh, that's possibly listening and, and taking something from this, that my personal relationship, I feel took off after Gematamos in multiple ways. Number one, I do feel that I did get a yachas prati. Rebbe says famously that when you have a question, something which you wanna ask a bracha, an eitzah of the Rebbe, you can ask the question, bring it to the Rebbe.

18:17 Speaker 1 Uh, from the Rebbe's point of view, you know, for sure he's connected, but even from my point of view, I, I, I sensed it and I felt it. You know, and the eight I remember hearing a recording of... I heard this many years ago, but I heard a recording of, um, Rebbe Mayor fabrengen in later years. I don't know, it's Tav Shnan or something like that, and he's-- If I recall correctly, what he says is, "Why is the Rebbe giving out dollars?" Says, "The Rebbe wants That's it. So that's, you know, Alter Rebbe chasid. That was his, that was his, um, you know, his insight or whatever, his, his, his, his perspective of, of what, what similar to what you're saying. So, um, yeah. Um, so you're saying that there's an advant-- that for you personally, at least wh-when you were there and being in the atmosphere, there's also a matter of years, you know, if you're younger and older, but, but, um, there's a certain Okay. So I guess that's a hidar for everyone, especially today when we don't have the-- even an option to, to, to, to, to decide how we have to make a connection. But, uh, interesting to hear it from someone that, uh, you know, that had sort of, uh, both, both perspectives to a limited extent. Okay. And I, I, and I do remember hearing from you over the years different things, a little bit about the atmosphere. You know, you talked after Chavsei Olam, I think you described

24:22 Speaker 1 to me once the, uh, the running to seven seventy whenever, when-whenever the beepers went off and things like that. So that's definitely something that I heard from, uh, you know, around the Shabbos table from, from, from you and from, from my other brothers. So, um, th-definitely, I mean, you can't, you can't, uh, discuss that you had that, that you had that, but obviously that there's, um... Was it like a certain point that you, like, realized that you have to acquire a, a hiskachus? Like, like did it happen or it's like over the years that's something that you developed? The point at one particular moment, uh, like in a more childish way around my bar mitzvah, I started like many Bochurim have this, you know, Ernst Kate phase around the bar mitzvah, which is a beautiful thing. Oh, the bar mitzvah fever. Yeah, I definitely had that. And Baruch Hashem, because I was around the Rebbe then, I have to say from a practical point of view, those moments that I had with the Rebbe are probably due to that, because that strengthened my connection. We were living in Monsey then, don't forget, and I, Baruch Hashem, have most of the A very good question. I just wanna add one more group to the audience. You mentioned the parents and the Bochurim, the Mechunim, and the Mashpiyim, and the Melamdim are also obviously part of the audience, and we're all partners in, in the Chinuch. Uh, and everyone himself is Chinuch Atzmi, uh, and that's the

28:01 Speaker 1 best way to be Mechunim of others. So anything of Chinuch, automatically everyone is in the audience. There's no one that could say he's out of it, whether the One of the integral components of being a Hasid are the Chassidish Yamim Tovim and Yemei Depagra. Whether it's Heitevis, Yut Shvat, Yud Aleph Nissan, or Gimmel Tammuz. These days give us an opportunity to connect with our Rabbeim, to connect with each other, and be better Chassidim. What is the story behind each of these days? How did the Rebbe commemorate and celebrate these days? And most importantly, what are the lessons, the takeaways, and the action items, needed for each of these days? All of this and much, much more are answered in the new set recently published by Der Her. Our Days is a journey through the Chabad calendar in story, meaning, and practice. With over seven hundred beautiful glossy pages with elevated content, beautiful, beautiful photographs, you, your family, and friends will enjoy and live with each Chassidish Yamim Tov. This book is a must for every Lubavitcher home, for every shul, for every school. It is a perfect gift item. This will not collect dust. It will be used day after day, month after month, year after year. You can have this setGo to derher.org forward slash our days. Order your set today and start living like a Chassidishe Yeminite.

31:18 Speaker 3 Every stage of chinuch has a certain accomplishment that you're doing right then of davening, of learning, of yashimayim, but also has, let's call it a skill-building element, which is needed to be taken to the next year and build on that, and that builds on the next stage. Now, Baruch Hashem, the lamdim, Hebrew gigaben, and they have systems that generally work, but let's face it, the reality is that from basically Kita Aleph and onwards, the melamed is talking to a group. It managed the younger, younger ages, kindergarten, pre-1A, there's more one-on-one. I don't know if every cheder is like this, but as far as I know, by and large, once you get to Kita Aleph, it's a melamed learning with a group. Now, there are systems in place to build those skills. They're not just learning a pasuk here and a pasuk there and a mishnah there. They're building their skills in Lashon HaKodesh, Vacholo, and Yedei Sempeira, but not every child will end up getting the skill that he needed at that stage. And here's where the melamed and the parents step in. You know, I'm not going to go into the whole great debate about homework, about whether it's beneficial or it's needed, whatever it is. There are suaras, l'kano, l'kan, and I have an opinion on it, but that's not for right now. I'm not going to go into that. But one thing I know for sure, if a child is not perfected in the skill that they need to achieve at that

32:42 Speaker 3 part of the year or that kuf of the year, that year as a whole, and they're going to the next level without that skill, you're setting them up for failure. The melamed need to be honest with the parents. Don't just, you know, smooth things over and say everything is good and only focus on the miles. Of course, when you speak to a parent, you want to emphasize the mile first and talk about the qualities of their child. And this is not a chusar. It's not necessarily anything the child did. Maybe it's harder for him. Maybe he needs a little bit of a different system. Zero in on that particular skill that that child needs. Show the parents what needs to be done. If the parent will sit, the father will sit with his son for 20 minutes every day and dedicate himself to building that skill, there will be peyus. And he'll make sure that his son is ready for the next stage. The Altar of Ben-Gezek, Eider Shemitas Vav, when he talks about the whole chezm of the sfitas, he uses a mashal of a father teaching their child. He doesn't use a mashal of a melamed teaching their child, a father teaching a child. And furthermore, the Altar says, the love of the child that the father has and the desire that the father has that the child should be matzlich in his learning, that's what makes the learning succeed pikama vekama. So therefore, when a father is sitting with his son, not

33:53 Speaker 3 just to be yetza a chazara that he learned with his rabbi, which is maybe the homework idea, but more that the father is taking this into his achrais. This is something which they were not fully successful in imparting to him in cheider. And I'm going to work with my son and make sure that he gets this. And I have that ratson for him to succeed, that will help him be successful. If a parent says he can't, I think that's usually not 100% true. But if he'll convince himself, okay, so hire a tutor. But we need to have some what they call brutal honesty. And if the melamed is not being forthcoming about this, then the parents have to investigate and ask the melamed, the menal, what Then sure, Baruch Hashem, most cases will be fine. But you need to make sure that I'm not talking about leaving children back or anything like that. I'm talking about imparting the message that your child will not succeed if he doesn't have this under his belt. Whether it's kirya, pashet Could I say the emes, if I may? If you have a 17-year-old baruch that struggles reading from a tilda, reading pashet Lashon HaKodesh with nekudes. What about Lashon HaKodesh? He has to read that without nekudes. He doesn't just have to read it. He has to translate it. He has to understand the flow of ideas. He needs a certain level of mastery of Lashon HaKodesh. Lashon HaGemara, the way the Gemara operates. These are things that

35:03 Speaker 3 are skills that do generally get picked up through the system that's in place, but not always. And it needs to be checked and monitored. And you should know the nafsha hu of your son, because a child that has the learning skills, a baruch that has the learning skills, chances are he'll be learning. If he's not successful at it and he's frustrated, then it's too hard for him. He just gives up. If he has the skills, he'll be learning. And if he's learning, then he has the may ha'teida in him. And then he doesn't have the chash of nachash and akravim because of mayim ein bo vecholo. So this is a simple, almost technical, but crucial message that I think is important that parents and chanchim should pay. I'm not saying no one's paying attention to this, but I think more attention has to be paid to this to ensure that the outcome is vis-a-vis-a-vis.

35:48 Speaker 1 So you're saying that instead of showing up to PTA and your rabbi smiling and saying your son's doing great, once I gave him a punishment, but otherwise he's good, everyone goes home and then they say the d'var Torah is beautifully at the table and then you know that you've done your job. It's incumbent on the parents to ask that question every year or every six months or whatever. Is he up to the level that you expect from your talmidim at this stage? And if yes, can he do something about it? If not, what can I do about it? Whether it's myself or a tutor, whatever it is, but just being cognizant and on top of that. And it makes a lot of sense what you're saying. At the end of the day, when you come to yeshiva and with all the other attractions, the social aspect, you know, there's letters from the rabbi. The rabbi writes that yeshiva is not only about learning, it's also about the atmosphere, which is true. But at the end of the day, what are you doing in a yeshiva? You're sitting and learning all day. And how do you expect someone to do that if they can't learn? And if they can't learn and they can't be successful at yeshiva, then they're bored. And then how do you expect them to You're a lot, and you mentioned the chashah makravim, yeshbe, that it's a lot easier for someone to not follow the path in Yiddishkeit in general if he's

37:05 Speaker 1 just not being succeed, if he's not succeeding year after year in yeshiva because he just can't. So it's actually very important. Um, and it's also important that the, the, the fluency in, uh, in Lashon HaKodesh is, uh, probably the most important skill to have periods. And that's basically... Because even if you're, if you're lacking the information from the learning, but if you have the ability to acquire it on your own, then y-you know, half the problem is taken care of. If you don't even have that ability, you're, uh, very, very limited. Okay. So that's, uh, that's like a very important... Um, there's another point you wanted to mention, right?

37:48 Speaker 3 So, so this-- no, this wasn't hagdah, but this is more of a-

37:52 Speaker 1 Technical

37:53 Speaker 3 ... technical, you know, skill, learning skills issue. And I, I definitely feel that, like you said, it's told the other yingerman also told him, and I heard from a mechanich when I was in kolel. He said that he, he does deal a little bit with the statistics and, you know, as a consultant, he said that more-- most of the time a bachur that's successful at learning and is matzliach in that is not the bachur that struggles in, in, in terms of Yishiman going to, to places where he shouldn't be. Obviously, there are exceptions, but a lot of times it's poshet. I'm not matzliach here, let me find a chevre that I could be matzliach. Let me find the guys to hang out with that are gonna make me feel simple kanefesh. I feel like I'm accomplishing because I'm not successful in the, in the, in the Beis Hamedrash. So this is crucial, not just for learning, but for Yiddishkeit too, like you mentioned. And also I wanted to make another, uh, point to what you said. The idea of connecting to the parents is also crucial. I didn't-- I wasn't thinking about that, but now that you mentioned it, not just to find out this information, but to preempt it and to always keep a connection. You shouldn't just wait for there to be a problem. Always pick up the phone and have a chat with the Melamed, just to touch base, and then this is, this is crucial. It's another reminder. Like I said,

38:57 Speaker 3 safe, call safe. The Melamed is there with a big class, and he needs, he needs encouragement and reminders to zero in on the details and the individuality of your child. And the best way of doing that is maintaining a, a, a good line of communication with, with the Melamed, with the, with the Magechi, with the Mashpia. Obviously, when they're getting older it's a little bit different, but the idea is still there also in its own way. Yeah. The other point that I wanted to mention is more of a little bit of a more you say this of Chinuch. A little bit-- goes a little bit deeper. There's a sikha which I would call like a landmark sikha in defining what Chinuch means in our generation. This is a sikha of Yut 5705. And bein hazmanim, the Rebbe talks there about three ingredients that are needed in Chinuch. And I'll try to break it down more or less the way the Rebbe explains it and then show how this could be applied in a practical level. Number one, a Yid has to have a basic recognition of his ultimate value as a Yid. He's connected to the Ibrishte because of his mahus, and that connection to the Ibrishte is the deepest, most important part of his life. He cannot imagine life without that. In his mind, in his heart, he should feel, me, not with my connection to the Ibrishte, I have nothing. I don't have a life in hashgacha peruchnis, I don't have a life

40:18 Speaker 3 in hashgacha. I'm a nobody. This is who I am. That's a nekuda. It's more like a rachmana liba boy type of connection. A Yid has to feel a connection. I'm, I'm Jewish at heart, but in a good way. I feel that connection to the Ibrishte, and that's a deep part of who I am. That's nekuda number one in Chinuch. Nekuda number two in Chinuch is activating that in day-to-day life. If that's true, it is true. Because it's true that my connection to the Ibrishte is so deeply part of who I am, let me actualize that in my life. Let me follow the Ibrishte's instructions and Torah mitzvahs, which practically means be a frum Yid. Follow the Ibrishte's ratzon in what it says in Shulchan Aruch in day-to-day life in Torah mitzvahs. Being a shomer Torah mitzvahs. That's stage number two. Stage number three in Chinuch is really getting the mind and the heart of the child, of the Talmud. Filling his mind with Torah. What I said before until now is more like an identity, a very deep iden-- sense of identity, who you are. Doesn't necessarily mean you learnt much about it, doesn't necessarily mean you feel much about it. It's something deeper than processing ideas. But when you're getting to that third stage, here's when you have to fill your mind with Torah. Your chachma, your bina, your daas will be completely immersed in Torah Hashem. That's gonna affect your whole klei mashlim of your keich hagolim, Lashon Chassidus, your, your klei mash

41:36 Speaker 3 Hanefesh, and that's gonna make the whole entire you be through and through penetrated with a, a connection to the Ibrishte. So again, stage number one is the basic rec-recognition that my identity is that I am a Yid. Before I even expressed it, expressing it in a nahaga hayom-yomis, al pi Shulchan Aruch, acting as a frum Yid should act. Number three, my mind and my heart, v'golui, are filled with ideas of Yiddishkeit, and that defines who I am and how I think and how I breathe and how I, and how I, and how I live my life in every sense of the words. Uh, so the Rebbe points out like this. This is the, this is the-- this is kind of stating the facts. But here's the, the way the Rebbe breaks it down, I think is very, very powerful, and the way the Rebbe puts it into today's day and age. Rebbe says like this: "Amal, the first two ingredients were a done deal. The cheder, the yeshiva did not have to put an emphasis on that. Obviously, it comes up, but that's not what they were there for. The family did it, the home did it, the Yiddishkeit hagass did it because a Yid was being raised in an environment that Yiddishkeit was so real to him that he, he couldn't think otherwise." Now, obviously, the Bechir is always there. You know, we're not gonna go into that right now. But by osmosis, he got that. Where did the yeshiva come in? Nekuda number

42:50 Speaker 3 three. Now that you know you're a Yid, now that you're living like a Yid, let me fill up your mind and heart with teich of Yiddishkeit, with teich of Torah, and let me get this going through every, every fiber of your being. That was the way it was amal. Today, this is not, this is not what's happening. We have to face the music and realize that a Mosed Chinuch has the responsibility to build the child and to build the bachur mei rosh el kaf raglay. I'm pretty sure it's the Lashon of the Rebbe. From head to toe, every part of him has to be developed under your care. You have to inculcate on him the basic recognition of him being a Yid and the Tarykait and the fact that life is not life without it. You have to teach him Parshat, Hadrahen, Shochanach, Menhagi Yisrael. And of course, the third thing too, filling his mind up with Tair. That's the general Nekudah, what the Rebbe says over there. Now, the Rebbe mentions also that even within Chadarim and Yeshivas Gufa, a person that's, let's say like myself, who's Mashpi Nazal or say someone at any stage that's a little bit more advanced, could say to himself, look, you've been taking this idea and accepting this idea that step number one and step number two have to be done by the Meistus Chinuch. But by me? That was done in kindergarten. That was done in pre-1A. That was done through Cheder. Now I'm teaching him Imi

44:12 Speaker 3 Kasuara. Now I'm teaching him a deep Ma'im Echsidus. Now I'm teaching him a Suara Nagimal. He go in of Hava Yisda Baive Rava. It was also for me. I have to build him up from scratch. Says the Rebbe, yes. No one is freed from this Achrais. You have to take the full Achrais to work on all of these three areas. Now, maybe it's true there's more emphasis at this age for certain ideas, but everyone has to be realizing that this is part of what he has to impart. What I would say, Ad Kan Divi Ara, what I would say a simple, not so simple, but a practical way how this has to be implemented is that whenever we're learning, whenever we're interacting with Talmidim, it can never just be that I'm teaching you a piece of information. However Kaddish Retah that piece of information is, however Emes it is, there has to be that Lebedike Tnuah of my Yid Hashamayim, of my Avas Hashem, of my Yiddishkeit coming through and not just that I'm saying a class and I'm saying information. Every one of us is a Dugmachaya. And in the way that we act, in the way that we talk, in the way that we convey even deeper information, there has to come across at the end this Nekudah. I'll give you an example of how the Rebbe Rashab did this with the Friteke Rebbe. The way I'm framing it, at least. The Friteke Rebbe tells over, it's a shimmer, it's like he wrote

45:29 Speaker 3 it up in a letter, printed in his Igges Kedes Chelek Dalet. But it's a sign he's capping from his Yuman from when it actually happened. He says, we were in Ostov. If I remember correctly, it was Tevis Tofish Ein Zion. And he says, we had a Seidah then, Friteke Rebbe had a Seidah with his father to learn together Bechadusa, sometimes by night, sometimes he'd wake up early and learn with a Kriyas. In Yom Echsidus. Then the Seidah was, they were learning Biuri Hazayah of the Mitlah Rebbe. Tifimay Mamim of the Altar Rebbe. My Mamim, they were not even said to Klal Echsidah. My Mamim, they were said to his children, to Yechid Esugul of the Talmidim. And they learned it, I think it was a Monday, he said the date, I remember the date, maybe even Chaveh Alaf or Chaveh's Tevis. The next day, the Rebbe Rashab said, okay, that tomorrow's learning session, we're also going to do Bashkama. Because the one before was the night, I remember. And that was a Tuesday, I think it was Chaveh's Tevis, Tofish Ein Zion. They were learning a Maimer in Biuri Hazayah. A deep Maimer, I think it was Hanoch of maybe Lamesha, one of the sons of the Altar Rebbe, with Hagois of the Tzemach Tzedek. And it was a deep Maimer itself. And if the Rebbe Rashab can learn a Maimer, obviously he's Megal of Eremech. Everyone that learns Rebbe Rashab's Maimer knows the Amkos. And he was like what we would call saying a

46:54 Speaker 3 very deep Shichsid system. He gives even the structure. He would give me Hakadama before we started learning inside. Then we learned it inside with deep Chalifos and with deep Hasbara, with Hamaka. And they were learning for two hours straight. I think it was like from 4.30 to 6.30, if I remember correctly, learning this Maimer in Biuri Hazayah. It was Geshmak, says the Friteke Rebbe. I had a Taynuk. I was enjoying it. The deep Sichliim that were flying in that room were Asagas of the Kos were very deep. And it was obviously Nikka on my face. And I sensed that my father also had that Geshmak. But at a certain point, the Rebbe Rashab stopped. And he turned to the Friteke Rebbe. And the Friteke Rebbe, I think, writes that he felt there was a reaction to his face of the enjoyment of the Geshmak. And he said, look. He said, the Pillu Parasha, and this is a famous word, but the Hemshach of the Rebbe Rashab saying a little bit differently, not so well known. The Pillu Parasha used to say that why am I so nizir in Yid Hashanayim, the Kinyonim, and Hidurim, and Chumrus? That I should be able to be taking properly Ayin Echsidus. So Zach Guft Ufnem and Ayin Echsidus. So by me being careful and being zahir in every Hid Mitzvah, I'm not threatening my purity of my Nesham in any way. And therefore, I'm going to be a Keilit understanding Echsidus better. Famous word. The Rebbe, by the way,

48:16 Speaker 3 Chazat the word from the Pillu Parasha. Said the Rebbe Rashab, and I say, and this is not so famous, and I say that the whole purpose of my Limid Echsidus and my deep understanding of Elichos is a Sozach Aplig and Ayin Echsidus. That I should have an Ayin of Yid Hashanayim in a Pnimistic Echhayas Pnim, in a real way, in an eternal way. That's why I'm learning Echsidus. So if it's just about the Taynuk, and it's just about the Geshmak, and it's Lem Sokhut Gut, and I got it, and I'm amazed by it, that's not the Seifish of Davor. Seifish of Davor, Akol Nishmat, so the Kim Yid of it's Mitzvot of Shmayim. How is this going to bring me to Yid Hashanayim? And that Pnimistic recognition, Yid Hashanayim, is what keeps a Yid on the right track. And if he knows that that's the most important thing in his life, he's going to make sure that he sees it through. And there's a very interesting story that follows, which from the context seems to be an Isfir of how when a person is Negid to Yid Hashanayim, he's going to make sure to go till the end to ensure that it works out in the right way. 6.30 in the morning, they finished learning, and said, let's go to the Mikvah, says the Rebbe Rashab. Usually he would go to the Mikvah later. And when he would go, he would go with his Mishalas. And the caretaker of the Mikvah would be notified before

49:33 Speaker 3 when he was coming. This was a Mikvah Noshem, that Mikvah Tara that the Rebbe Rashab would use in the morning. This is In Ostov. In Ostov. I'm not sure if this Famous, yeah, famous Mikvah. Oh, so I'm not sure because it says in this letter that they went to the Mikvah somewhere else. So I don't know if there were two apartments or this was before he built the Mikvah. I don't know. That I'll leave for Chaykim to determine. But they went to the Mikvah, and he said, I'm not taking anyone. I'm just going with you, the Friteke Rebbe. And they come to the courtyard, so it's clear that it was in a different building. They ring the bell, and the Shamer comes, and he opens up for them. And he asks to speak to the Yid that was the caretaker of the Mikvah. And the caretaker says, "I didn't expect you now. I didn't know you were gonna come now." He says, "Yeah, that's why I came now. I wanna come unexpected." Says, "One second. Just give me a few minutes 'cause I wanna straighten things up in the mikveh." Says, "No, no, no. I wanna see the mikveh as it is now. That's why I came." He goes into the mikveh, and the entry--the first room where you come into the mikveh had a smell. You know? It, it didn't smell good, you know. We know what mikvehs could smell like. It didn't smell good. In the mikveh itself-- I'm sorry, in the room

50:46 Speaker 3 wh-where the smell, there was like also, like, things broken on the floor. It was a stickle mess, kitsch in. The room with the mikveh, he says the water was clean, interestingly enough. Even in this dirty mikveh, the water was clean, but over the water was flying bugs and things that were in the water. It didn't look that good, basically. And continues a, a quite sharp Divrei Mussar, if you wanna call it, to, to this caretaker of the mikveh, that when you know the chinuch that you have, that yes, women are more used to be resembling an fish. They didn't care about what kind of mikveh they went into. But today, if there's gonna be someone that's not gonna go to the mikveh because of this, Chas v'Shalom, the, the hiv Carlos, et cetera, and Bnei Ya need to come out of this. And, uh, the opposite, the zchus that you have by maintaining a beautiful mikveh and that people are gonna wanna use it to never be turned off from the-- from talas and Mishpacha as a result of your actions, could you imagine how, how much that has an impact?

51:37 Speaker 4 The Rebbe says the story, by the way, if I'm-

51:39 Speaker 3 The end, the ending, right.

51:41 Speaker 4 Yes, that's it.

51:42 Speaker 3 I'm not-- I'm, I'm not sticking with the Agada. So the point is that here, here's a message how in the moment of the biggest gishmak, how you could turn it and show how all of this is all about ki yemeretzel alien, making a yid more connected to the Ibrishtar, fulfilling the ratzon of the Ibrishtar, how it is in Shulchan Aruch and doing it in the way it should be. Now, that nekuda is not something which is only relevant, uh, it could be relevant to anything. You know, the, the, there's a sicha of the Frieda Kareva where he says that Mohammed, that teaches-- What does he teach? He teaches Aleph Beis. Phonetics. He's teaching sounds. You know, the chasid, the chavrei Aishes are not just in Lashon Hakodesh, in every language it sounds. We have different names for it and different shapes for it, but he's teaching, teaching sounds, he's teaching Aleph Beis, he's teaching letters. What, what, what's tutashay? Says the Frieda Kareva. A real Melamed has a, a deep appreciation to the Kedushas Aishes. It's valuable to him. Not only is it valuable to him, they brennen in him. The Aleph Beis brent in zayn harts. A Melamed that teaches Aleph Beis said, "Brent in zayn hart Aleph Beis." What does that mean? That's not about teaching information. To teach information, you need to be a good teacher and hold a class and make sure they memorize it. No, this is not what we're talking about here. That too. But we're talking about that

52:57 Speaker 3 said, "Brent in him Aleph Beis." And not only in him, but when he teaches Aleph Beis to tell me them, the Aleph is a brennen dicker. It's a burning, flaming Aleph. When he teaches Kamatz, the Kamatz is a brennen dicker. That's a different Limud. It's a different Aleph Beis. And he says the same thing when he teach real Pasuk or Chumash. If in the Melamed, the brent in, the Kedushas Hatay, the Kedushas Aishes, that can be imparted by the child. You don't have to say anything. He sees it. I'll just take a random example, something which comes up every Monday and Thursday, every Shabbos. In a yeshiva with-- It's part of our yeshiva. You know, maybe in a cheder, it's not part of the curriculum, but it happens every Shabbos when the father ensures. Krias HaTorah. Krias HaTorah. We have a big sign. Asur le dabber b'shaas Hatzfiut or Krias HaTorah. We know it's Isser of Shulchan Aruch. Yeah, you could tell them, and you could even demand from them Kabbalah sale and, and maybe even, you know, tell them off. Yeah, you could, you could, you could, you could teach Yiras Shamayim the technical. That would be the, the, the-- just with the second point. Yeah, teach them what to do. But the first point, recognizing that I'm a yid, recognizing that I have connection to the Ibrishtar could come through when you're teaching them not to speak during Krias HaTorah. Why? Because what's Krias HaTorah? Psichas Ha'aren. You know what Psichas Ha'aren is?

54:07 Speaker 3 The whole Sicha in the Kutat Debulim, rich description of Psichas Ha'aren by the Rabbeim. It's Psichas Ha'aren, the Rabbeim would move from their place. They wouldn't stand where they were. They would walk over to the Aron Kodesh, looking at the Sefer Torah. The Rebbe didn't do this. It's interesting, the only person I saw in our generation doing this is a man, Ladano, from Toronto. Oh, Hashem used to do this. By Krias HaTorah, until he got very old, and he wasn't able to move around that much. By Psichas Ha'aren, I didn't realize why he was doing this until I came across the Sicha in the Kutat Debulim. He would walk over to the Aron Kodesh. The Rebbe would turn. Yeah, you wanted to say something?

54:39 Speaker 4 No, no, I was about to say what you're saying. That the-

54:41 Speaker 3 Oh. The Rebbe would turn. The Rebbe would turn a siddur towards Aron Kodesh, make that movement towards Aron Kodesh. When they would take out the Sefer Torah, they would look. And we know when the Rebbe was gazing at the Sefer Torah, as it was going towards the bimah, was a very intense gaze. I remember hearing, I forget from which Chassid, he was being retired, the Rebbe's gaze following Rebbetzin Chana when she would walk home. And he said, "If you wanna get a glimpse of that gaze," which was a mixture of deep ava, but deep yirah, a certain, like, awe of his mother, look at how the Rebbe looks at a Sefer Torah. That's something which is on video, something that people later also, after Tachrich Ve'aveh, were able to relate to. That look of kibbus HaKodesh and yiras HaKodesh on the Sefer Torah, they would also point out sometimes to children looking at him, "Look at the Sefer Torah." So the whole-- This is something-- Something's happening here. The Alter Rebbe once said, I think I saw this in Migdal Oz, if I remember correctly, that the Alter Rebbe told the Baal Kareah, he said that when you're reading Parashat HaShavua, you know what's happening? That very same Hamshacha, that Ohel Hakodesha that was Nimshach, the very first time the Ibrishtar said that Parashat to Moshe Rabbeinu, that's being Nimshach right now in the Shul by Krias HaTorah. Okay. So if you sense that, if you, if you're aware of this, and you get into

55:58 Speaker 3 that mode, what is-- I don't have to tell you not to talk during Krias HaTorah. What do you mean? This is like the Frieda says in a Maimer, if you're talking during Krias HaTorah, it's like coming into a palace And trying to push the king out of the palace. What are you here for? He says it's like an az ponim. He says these words, my mom can trace them. I remember exactly, my mom mark him. It's like an az ponim trying to be megarish de melech me heichale. You have this chus coming to heichale melech, and here the melech is, and you're like, you're rejecting him? So I'm not saying this to try to, you know, make middas hadin come on anybody. I'm trying to say, if you could give over to a talmud that this is what it means, this halacha shulchan aruch that you have to keep, but it means your connection to the Eibush that it's an opportunity. It's a gila lekus taking place. The Rebbe Rashab, when he would, Bimarav said that it says in the shimus, his tears were coming down from his eyes from gila lekus. Okay, I'm not saying that everyone is going to reach that level, but recognize that shnei mikveh chatargum is not just a shore that you have to do. It's not just this thing, oh, I got to do this, you know, and if you want to be mahader to do it before you make kiddush on Shabbos day and whatever it is. No,

57:01 Speaker 3 this is the way you're preparing yourself to access that eik hadusha. You're saying these words, you're saying it a second time, you're saying the targum, you're bringing it into yourself. This is kiasa teira. This is a way, and the same thing applies to any inyan of teira mitzvos. There's a way to convey it that it comes across that it's leopardic, that it's real, that it's brent, that this is part of my connection to the Eibush there, part of my yiddish mayim. I want to make a suggestion, and this is true for bachrim, for parents, for mechanchim. If you want to have a tool to be able to have that chinuch for yourself, like I mentioned, chinuch atzuma and chinuch zolasei, a beautiful tool that's underused is the sichas and the shimus and the letters of the fidikidaba. There's so much in there. By the way, also what I told you about the tear of kiasa teira is from sichas and the shimus of the fidikidaba. So much of the melamed, the tear of what it's, how it's really meant to be, siddim the way they were, the surah of every inyan of yiddishkeit and a real leopardic eifen, that's in the pages of the sichas of the fidikidaba. There were years, by the way, that Eib would start a fabrengen by quoting a sicha of the fidikidaba with a certain round number of years prior to the fabrengen. And the first sichot were all revolving around that.

58:12 Speaker 4 Yeah, the Rebbe could sometimes take a shtikel and dissect the lashaynus in the, that fidikidaba uses. Yeah.

58:20 Speaker 3 I have a little bit of a dream. I'm not doing it and it's not trademarked, but if you're doing it, let me know because like this, I don't know how to do it. Take all the writings of the fidikidaba and to set them up. The Folekan did it a little bit, but like Mama, she didn't have that much then. Take it and to set it up in Musagam. What a fabrengen is. We all fabrengen. Do you know what a fabrengen is? I guarantee you, if you're going to learn the sichas of the fidikidaba and the Rebbe about what a fabrengen is, you're going to go to the next fabrengen differently. If you're going to read the sichas of the fidikidaba about the story that Tzemach Tzedek, when he put on tefillin and the chassid that was watching from behind the door and saw the way that Tzemach Tzedek kissed his tefillin, you're going to take your tefillin, take them out differently tomorrow. If a likut, a parashat of Musagam, of teyrimitzvas, of inyanim, do you say the hayaim? But even if you're not, even if that's not yet written, to go through sichas of the fidikidaba, that gives you a shiifa to gain hecher. I mentioned before that all successful people, I believe, in their Yiddishkeit are born out of looking for emes, searching for the emes. The fidikidaba sichas are a beautiful tool to be a searching chassid, to be a chassid that will gain abusal hecher, will zain a merapim istakid. That's just

59:27 Speaker 3 a practical suggestion.

59:30 Speaker 4 I was speaking to a Yid recently who has an interesting perspective. He's a chassid and he learns chassidus. He didn't go to Tempech at Temimim. And I was speaking to him recently. So there's a, recently there was a hayaim about Tehillim, right? So he was telling me his perspective. It's like, it's very interesting that I'm noticing Chabad is all about the haskal, the chafam, the ladas, and the farach chassidus. But then there's a whole nother facet that I'm seeing in Chabad, or that I see or that I know in Chabad, is this inyan pshitus. And like the hispatos and the way it is, the expression of it, he was saying, is very much when you have to say the whole Tehillim. I mean, this is a big aveda. And usually that was relegated to Pashat Yidden or, you know, classically. The fidikidaba and the Rebbe, you know, famously the Rebbe said that when Sheik comes, one of the questions is going to be how many Yidden did you bring to Tehillim? 830. So it's like an interesting, this guy was telling me a perspective. That's one of the elements that's demanded of everybody. You could be the biggest maskil, yet it's demanded of you to have a certain pshitus and erentzkeit and temimus in avedas Hashem. And the Rebbe told, there was this guy, he wrote Nine and a Half Mystics, Herbert Weiner. He was a rabbi, I think reform rabbi, and then later he became a frum Yid. There's a video of Badalas, the

1:01:11 Speaker 4 Rebbe telling, I think the Rebbe was telling him to let people know about it, that he became a frum Yid. So he has this book, Nine and a Half Mystics. He's hanging around 10-7 in the Yuds. He asked the Rebbe, he had a chidduson. I'm saying this is the Yuds, right? So he asked the Rebbe, I noticed that with your bachrim, they have a certain, like a problem that he's having. It's a certain naivete to them. And like, what's that about? I mean, you know. So the Rebbe said, it's not a naivete. It's the lashon that he uses, and he quotes the Rebbe, that they don't have a kera. I don't know how to translate that exactly. They don't have a split. They're not split. They have temimus. They have a certain gantzkeit and a certain, yes. I remember there was once someone fabrengen when I was a young bachrim saying, soon when you're out of the bachrim, you put on tefillin and close your eyes. I'm like, oh, really? That's a value? You know, like, this is a Okay, so th-th-there's a, there's a certain, uh, take it seriously. Taking it seriously.

1:02:24 Speaker 3 You mentioned Tehillim, I think it's a very perfect example. Because you could, you could just say we're just doing the hard work of saying Tehillim, but the, the Rebbe printed Chevet Smichtavim at the back of Tehillim.

1:02:37 Speaker 4 Mm-hmm.

1:02:38 Speaker 3 If you look at Chevet Smichtavim of the Chabad Rebbe, that's exact-- That's by the way the Rebbe doing my, my idea uh, for Tehillim. Rebbe was smart.

1:02:47 Speaker 4 It's not a, it's not your idea, basically.

1:02:49 Speaker 3 Yeah, yeah, I'm joking. I'm joking. The Rebbe would put the Yanam Tehillim, and if you read those stories, and you read those Tiurim of Tehillim, you'll, you'll come to a minister in a different Eifern. I remember I was in a shul once here in Toronto. I live, I'm here broadcasting from Toronto. I was in a shul, not a Lubavitcher shul, and there was Lubavitcher's doing 'cause it's an Asher Davin in that shul as well. And there's a Yid, you know, somehow Beini Lebeini, Achareitz between them. In Chameirev, he's browsing through the, the stories in the back of Tehillim. He's like, "Ah." He's like, "Pashut like Basmakov Yitzchak Medavim." He was Pashut the Reichkeit o-o-of what was going on over there. He was Pashut Mesfol from it. He wasn't-- Nobody, nobody was telling him anything. He was seeing it himself. That's a perfect example where you could take a minister Tehillim from being a shore and being something on a piece of paper that you have to, you know, uh, you know, get a, g-get a quota and, you know, do a-- get a, get tickets on your, on your Tzedakah Hashem, whatever it may be, which is also good things. The Rebbe encouraged, you know, this idea of competition. But as the child gets older-

1:03:47 Speaker 4 The Rebbe, the Rebbe made it.

1:03:48 Speaker 3 For sure, for sure. I don't know about Shabes Machim Tehillim. I'm saying the, according to Shabes Machim Tehillim. But the idea of, uh, Rebbe was mainly focusing on mitzvahs that are Shavuach Hanefesh. That's another rant for a different time. Tzedakah Hashem was meant to be a global thing for all Yidden together, not just for Anash. We're getting to a different discussion. But the, the idea of, of, of as a, as a child gets older, what is the power of a minister Tehillim? What does it really mean? And I'm not saying that you have to have all Pirshamilus of the Tehillim, but even if you just have that appreciation of a minister Tehillim that's in the Chevet Smichtavim Tehillim, guarantee you walking Shabes Machim Tehillim in a, in a, in a different Eifern.

1:04:27 Speaker 4 Okay. I remember some anecdote of Chevet Smichtavim when I was a kid. I used to go through it, but it's not Shakedish. I didn't understand. Uh, so there's the one story in Yiddish that I understood, you know, with the Kutcher that been, been seeing the Mashades.

1:04:42 Speaker 3 Yeah.

1:04:45 Speaker 4 And the Kutcher says, "I'm only, um, the g-the-- I live to get another, uh, another drink of rum."

1:04:52 Speaker 3 Drink of rum.

1:04:53 Speaker 4 Yeah. It was like, uh-

1:04:55 Speaker 3 On Sha- drink of rum on Far Beisyn. I think that's what he said.

1:04:58 Speaker 4 Far Beisyn, yeah. Among Chassidim is brought to you by Chassidish Der Her. We live in a chaotic world, a world where for us Chassidim, as they say, Nu, lo ra'inu. We do not have the ability to hear and see the Rebbe on a daily basis. Yet we know that the Rebbe is very much with us, and Chassidish Chabad is alive and thriving more than ever before. One needs to only tap into it. Chassidish Der Her provides you and your family with the tools necessary to tap into all of this, whether it's the monthly magazine, the way it all began, whether it's Der Her books, Der Her online content, and so much more. Men, women, and children throughout the world benefit and use these tools on a daily basis, whether it's children enjoying the children's magazine that comes along with the regular Der Her or enjoying the children's podcast, whether it's Bachrim in Yeshivas receiving the Der Her, whether it's girls in high schools enjoying Der Her Club in their local high school. People all over the world and from all walks of life enjoy and utilize these tools and take advantage of it. If you're not already subscribed to Der Her monthly magazine, do so today at derher.org. That's D-E-R-H-E-R.org. Der Her is a dynamic organization which is committed to continue providing these tools, grow on a constant basis, and do all that we can to help this effort. Baruch Hashem, it takes a lot of resources and finances to make this all happen. You

1:06:51 Speaker 4 can be part of Der Her through your financial support as well, through visiting our website, derher.org, or through contacting us to setting up a meeting. Thank you very much. Enjoy the rest of the podcast.

1:07:03 Speaker 3 One more, one more thing I wanted to add about this idea of as a Mechanech to convey not just the facts and the information, but the Lebdikait and the Emeskait of how you live it as Yiras Hashem and Eiv Hashem. They're watching us, you know? We're doing Mechaya. That's the fact. Whether it's a Melamed, whether a Mashpia.

1:07:27 Speaker 4 A parent.

1:07:28 Speaker 3 Yeah, a parent. I w-- I remember once, uh, there was a Simcha here in Toronto, a relative of Mishpacha that was taking place in the Yeshiva, and it took place right after Chassidis, before Shacharis. And the Suda was happening then, and the Zal Bachrim were, were going on to Davening. Because it was Mishpacha, I Davened before Chassidis that day. I Davened with a six thirty Minyan, six forty-five. I came to Chassidis, and like this, I was able to participate in the Simcha. So after the Biris, you know, bagels, lox, whatever they serve over there, I washed. It's between Chassidis and Shacharis for the Zal Bachrim. A Bacha behind me also washed. So somebody told him, "I don't understand. You're, uh, you're washing now like you're eating?" He says, "What do you mean? Rabbi came and just, uh, washed." So people are watching us, you have to be careful. You know, the ienia nikim, that's another topic. But when, when a, when a child, when a Talmud sees how seriously and how real your Yiddishkeit is, that has the deepest impact. Uh, when I was, um, at the Schleishin gathering for the Eli Chaim Reitblat. I remember what year this was. This took place in Altaira, the, uh, in the Chason Hall, and one of the speakers was Rav Herschel Chidrik, who was a Talmud of his and back in Russia. And he said, "I'll tell you how he taught us Halakha. He didn't teach us Halakha just 'cause as a shtate." He said that the

1:09:00 Speaker 3 Eli Chaim didn't have money, and he came that day, you could see that he was Pashet hungry. I think it's, you know, he said-- he was saying he was in, like, trembling from hunger. So he Pashet tal bad from as a child. He gave him a portion or whatever he had that he was eating or a chelek of it. And I don't think a Melamed would typically say yes to that, but he did because he was so hungry. He didn't touch it. He took it, and he put it aside. After they finished, they didn't have running water in those days in the buildings. Water they had, apparently. Food they didn't. He went out, and he went to wash until Yosidaya because it was a Michel Shetipuli Bomashka. So he said, "That's taught me Hala-- That's, that's how I learned Halakha in Shulchan Aruch." There's different deis of how much you have to be Makpid on it. I'm not gonna go into that right now of, of how to, uh, be Makpid on a Michel Shetipuli Bomashka, that he didn't eat it when he was starving until he wa- was able to leave and go and wash and then come back and then eat it. Uh, we, we once had Fabregin here in Toronto, and Rabbi Chaiken from Cleveland was visiting. He has his children here. And it was a Fabregin. It was a big Fabregin. It was the Sudu Shabbos together with the Yeshiva. So they were serving different foods. I forget what it was.

1:10:11 Speaker 3 I think it was a Saimita Pagre. So they had the fish course was first, obviously, and, uh, there was also salad, and everyone's eating the fish and the salad and the herring, whatever it may be, and then the Kikhelach, right? All of a sudden, someone comes from the kitchen and says that the salad is a chicken salad. The taste, uh, like I guess that it looked like maybe it was like hearts of palm or something, and it's really little pieces of chicken. So what happened? That means everyone's eating chicken salad with the fish. So, you know, they started taking away from the table. I was watching Rabbi Chaiken then at the moment. As soon as he heard that, instinctively, he gathered everything from his mouth. I could see him doing that. He gathered it. He t- he took something, a napkin. He spit it out, and he immediately took something in his mouth, and he washed his-- rinsed his mouth out. Most other people just swallowed what was in their mouth. And they And they akad in the Saich. And, you know, they moved it off. But that was Yishamael. You know, y-you see that it's real. You see that it's something that's-- I-it means something to me. It's not just Halakha on, on the book. This is how I live my life. This is, this, this is, this is what makes me excited. This is what makes me even, yeah, even, even anxious because this is real to me. That's something which we can

1:11:30 Speaker 3 impart constantly to our children, to our Talmidim, and the way we conduct ourselves in the Erenzkeit that we face, a, a mitzvah, and Hiddur mitzvah, and the, and the, and the, and the Chivus that we give it. It's something which is conveyed constantly in ways that are more powerful than words.

1:11:47 Speaker 4 Okay. So, um, hopefully, we can achieve it in ourselves and give that over to our Mechunachim.

1:11:55 Speaker 3 Yeah.

1:11:56 Speaker 4 Um, so let me ask you a question back to the learning part. So besides-- We spoke about the tools to know how to learn, but there's certain-- there's some-- there's a certain motivation needed. There's also some-- There's different-- People have different personalities. What if you have a bachur that he's wired-- I mean, today we have fancy names for it, ADD, ADHD, whatever it is. But let's say, you know, at the end of the day, there's personalities. Some people, their personality gives them a hard time from sitting with an open sefer dayam havalayla. So that bachur needs an extra motivation, you know, 'cause it doesn't come so naturally. So what is a way to cultivate in our Talmidim and in ourselves, um, you know, a, a healthy motivation for, for, for learning?

1:12:58 Speaker 3 That's a very good question, and it doesn't only apply to the bachur or the child that has difficulty learning, because as we know, the oven, the bittel teira is something which is another nitz m'chol yom, which means it's a constant challenge, even for somebody that has a Gashmaka learning and has talent and has a Tzlach learning and has those skills. And, uh, I'm gonna say something which I think applies to everybody, and, uh, I think it's a little bit all-inclusive. One general point is never try to whittle away and deflate a motivation. Any motivation that's gonna get you to learn has value, even if it's sh'lo lishma. It's not my invention. It takes sh'lo lishma about lishma. So yeah, if someone is learning because it says in Shulchan Aruch you have to learn, and he's gonna have that level of Kabbalah, so he just gets to put on Tefillin, he's just gonna look and see what it says in Halacha Samaritain. If it says I have to learn Yam ha-Malaya, fine. If I'm a businessman and I have to go work. And, and even if he's not on that level that he's gonna do it in every detail, but he knows this is what I have to do. Kabbalah sale is also a good thing. That's, that's, uh, that's, uh, that's not a sh'lo lishma, that's a lishma. But then there's sh'lo lishmas. If a person is learning because of peer pressure, because of social pressure. I'll be, I'll be eleven. If a person is

1:14:10 Speaker 3 learning because he'll feel like, you know, he's, uh, he's not gonna be considered to be a, a normal mensch if he's not mishnat of an Ashir Limud, you know, he's a psach tikov, a loser. That's also good. If a person thinks of Schar Oinish, mentioned by the way in Tanya, Oinish a bittel teira, right? Whether it's Schar Hashmi, whether it's Schar Ruchni, whether it's Schar from a Ben Adam, whether it's a stipend, whether it's a, a recognition, all these things should not be deflated. Because don't forget, we are human beings, and we have the Nefesh Abahames in us too. So when our Nefesh of the kids is not in the right mode, we could use those motivations. And every motivation is therefore useful, n-never to be discarded. Of course, we have to build and go deeper and go higher, but not at the ex-- not, not, not to-- not from the gate. Any motivation. Any motivation that brings you to do something good, keep it. Keep it exercised. It's gonna come to good use. It's a tool in your toolbox. But a little bit more in a pnimius dikayfin, and I have to be a little bit true to my, uh, title that you mentioned before as a mashpia that learns Chassidus, but I'm gonna say a little bit of my signin. You know, it's based on what we, we're all familiar with, which I think is a little bit more of a pnimius motivation that could get a bracha to and a Yinger man

1:15:21 Speaker 3 to be more engaged and be more committed, be more dedicated to Limudat Chayim. I mentioned before those three ingredients that I ever mentioned regarding Chinuch, and I wanna fall back on that a little bit. If I recognize in a real deep way that my mahus is my being a Yid, and this is what I'm looking for, I'm looking to amplify that mahus of who I truly am, I'm gonna look for ways to make that happen. So for example, let's say he was metatech by himself a little bit more Yiras Shamayim. It's neget him what the Eibishter wants him to do. It's neget him a sifrer Shulchan Aruch. This is a labradika thing for him. If I know that I have to fulfill what it says in Shulchan Aruch, I cannot physically be an amar that's in Halacha Lemayseh. If I'm ignoring it, that I'm not, not machshav it in my life, if this is not, not important to me, yes, then I might not know. But if I know this is who I am, I know this is how I would like to live, I know this is what I want to be, and I wanna fill myself up with this fully, that's my shifha. So now my-- I'm committed to fulfilling the ratzon of the Eibishter. I personally wanna be frum. I'm not talking about any geyse modregas. If I wanna be a frum Yid and keep Shulchan Aruch, I will be meshech hashonin automatically become knowledgeable in Halacha. What do I mean automatically?

1:16:36 Speaker 3 I don't mean automatically that it's just gonna pop into your head because you'll feel one second, "I don't know a lot of information that I need to know. I need to know this. I have to know it." If you have to know something because that's negia to your success in life, I need to know it. There's no way that I could succeed without knowing this information. I might have to learn kids of Shulchan Aruch. I might have to learn Alter Rebbe Shulchan Aruch. I might have to learn other suman of Shulchan Aruch that are not available Alter Rebbe Shulchan Aruch from other schvarim. I will then have questions too. I will have find things that maybe are not clear in Shulchan Aruch. I'll have a, I'll have a Rav that answers my questions. I'll spend time figuring this out. Just by being a frum Yid and wanting to live a life with the ratzon of the Eibishter, um, guiding me will, so to speak, force me to become quite knowledgeable in Halacha Lemayseh. Like so for example, so sometimes occasionally I go up to this for breakfast in Yeshiva. One of the things they serve is cornflakes, okay? I'm not, I'm not saying this as a Rav, you know, ask your local Orthodox rabbi for further guidance. But over the years, right now they have-- they're stable with one particular brand. But over the years, it was different companies that they were buying the cornflakes from. And depending on how the cornflakes are made, it

1:17:40 Speaker 3 could be either a chadam or a shehakol. If basically they crush the, the actual corn into a flake, so it's still basically a, a whole piece of corn, it's chadam. If they grind it into a flour and then produce a paste out of it and then shape out, um, like out, out of a dough, they shape out these cornflakes, it's shehakol. This is according to my understanding, according to what I looked into at the time. And the companies were actually, it was different companies were coming into the Yeshiva. So now if I turn to a bach and I say, "Okay, what bracha is the, the, the cornflakes?" And he's in the middle of eating the cornflakes, and he's thinking. I say, "Well, what bracha did you make on it?" "Oh, I washed." "Okay. Okay, but the other bracha next to you didn't wash." So if you're keeping Shulchan Aruch, you have to know what bracha do I make on that. I need to look, I need to like learn, say the brachos and then, and I need to find a little bit about food production. I will not become a gaase Rav, but every frum Yid therefore that truth himself will become knowledgeable in Halacha. So by extension, if it's not just about knowing what to do, it's about knowing who I am and who to be, that carries over to Limudat Chayim in general. Uh, uh, let me tell you an example. A mashal. Mashal l'mahadav et de'imah. You have an individual that achman

1:19:01 Speaker 3 havetzlan lived through the Holocaust as a child. The parents-- This happened, by the way. I'm saying it as a mashal, but this happened to more than one person, unfortunately. The parents died Al Kidush Hashem, were killed Al Kidush Hashem by the Nazis, Im Achshav. They gave up the child to an orphanage, to a monastery, to a Goyishe family, to a nanny. They were raised... They don't have any memory of their parents. They might have been babies when they were given over. They survived the war, and the parent, the nanny or the, the, the orphanage was kind enough to provide them real information about who their parents are and that they're Jewish. And now they're living a life that they're trying to live with hatslacha as a Yid, as a human being. We know of Yosef, unfortunately, but this is different. The, this Yosef never met his father. Not only did he not meet his father, he doesn't have any clue of who his father is, even today, achman havetzlan. Unfortunately, the story with Sidney, you have a baby that lost a father. But I wanna tell you that that child will know their father quite well from friends, family, videos, recordings, stories. Of course, einai de'imah. You know, obviously, I'm not Chas ve'Shalom. You know, this is, this is a serious issue. But they're gonna have a certain feeling of who their father was, a certain feeling of identity, of how they come into the family, and how their, their continuation is because they have

1:20:21 Speaker 3 knowledge of that. But imagine this child that doesn't have any family, doesn't have any friends of his parents, is basically a totally separate person from where he came from. You can imagine the feeling of loss and the feeling of like a, a nobody. V'he binich. Vayhi hayom, and he meets somebody that he discovers was one of his father's close friends. And this friend starts describing his father. You can imagine how the child will feel. I was, uh, somebody passed through town, I'm not gonna mention names, and, uh, I mentioned him. His father passed away when he was a young child, and I told him something from his father, how his father would daven. I, I, I, I repeated a certain nusach hatfila, the way his father, the tune that his father would sing I-- he, he was mesmerized. He was partially listening to me like, like he was hearing a He's reading a journal that his father wrote for him, and his father writes to him how all of this of the family and all of the chacham of the father, how this is going to you into the next generation. He talks to him about his keich that he has. Maybe when he was a little baby, recognizing even the potential, maybe he was raised, he was a tzaddik, he was a rachok kodesh. You know, you could embellish the story if you want. It's not a real story anyway, but this is the mashal. And he's giving him guidance and hadracha in his

1:23:00 Speaker 3 life, what he can do, how he can live his life. And the son who's now reading this, let's say he's thirty years old, he says, "Wow, this guy really understood me. This is what I went through." And now this son will never let go of that notebook. He's not gonna have to be told that this is something you have to learn and you have to live by. This is what he wants to be. This is what he was looking for his whole life. This is what he was missing. Ad kan is the mashal. When you know that that's what Torah is, and you value yourself. I'm not talking about yashrus. You value who you are, who you're meant to be. You have a neshamah, and you value your connection to the Eibishter. You have that shiur to gain hecher and to get more connected to that emes. And you have that machberes with your name on it. Torah tsiva lanu Moshe morasha kehillas Yaakov. It's to you. It's the same chachamim. You have your portion of Torah. It's not just halacha. Torah is telling you Torah is chayim. Hayu ha'chayim. Everything in Torah is molding the way I think. It's molding the way I feel. It's showing me direction of life. It's showing me everything. It's showing me how to live, how to breathe, how to think, how, how, how to view, how to view everything. So when you have that approach, again, a child maybe is not on that level, and maybe this child

1:24:24 Speaker 3 of the Holocaust survivor also was not on that level to appreciate when he was seven years old. But as you're getting older and you're the age that you're a bachur, you're maturing, think to yourself, "What do you want in life? What is wichtig to do?" Let, let the emes resonate that you're a Yid. This is who you are. This is what you wanna be. This is what you wanna be successful at doing, at living more correctly. The Torah is that machberes that the Eibishter gave to you to know what life, what your life is all about. When you have that shiur, let's call it, that strebung to gain hecher, that strebung to connect, and you realize that the Torah is your recipe, then you're gonna have a motivation to learn. Now, I'm not saying you're gonna use every minute. I'm not saying you're not gonna battle a little bit, but you're not gonna be somebody, "Why am I doing this?" I wanna illustrate a little bit further and carry it a little bit closer to maaseh b'paya. Halacha, I mentioned before, halacha is clearly showing me how to live. That machberes that the yasom from the Holocaust had, the most important thing that I think that he would cherish is how this gives me a purpose and a guidance in life. He might appreciate the chacham of his father and the nuances and the words that he chose to use. It's amazing. But the most important thing I think that he will value is how

1:25:37 Speaker 3 it shows him how to live and how to be and who he is. Halacha is that chelek of Torah. I'm not, chas v'shalom, devaluing amkus and svara and higayon of Torah, but there's a certain beauty about appreciating Torah because it shows me how to live. And it's not only Shulchan Aruch. This is the mistake.

1:25:54 Speaker 5 Maaseh Sheyashar, the Rebbe always says.

1:25:56 Speaker 3 Oh, exactly. But this is the mistake. There's a-- I'm not challenging any stardim in yeshivas, including the yeshiva that I work in and other yeshivas. I'm, I'm just saying this as a-- I'm, I'm laying out the facts and, you know, you can do whatever you want with it. There is a derech halimut that the rabbeim have set up. There's a derech halimut. First of all, in Tanya, Peh Hei, when he talks about the ma'alot limud haTorah, halacha is mentioned numerous times. When you have the psak halacha clear of how the Eibishter wants you to act in this world, even if it doesn't happen b'paya, fine, but the clarity and the vision of how life has to run according to Torah. So in the hakdamah of the Midrash Rabba, the Alter Rebbe Shulchan Aruch, he says, "A seudah halimut of learning le'iyun." And that seudah halimut is framed around alibud hilchosa.

1:26:44 Speaker 5 Isn't there also from the Rebbe Hasham, Kuntress Chaim, a similar thing, right?

1:26:49 Speaker 3 Similar. There are levels there. We'll get there in a second. The, the Midrash Rabba talks about learning the Masachta properly, the Ashan Tosfos. It talks about learning the Rosh, learning the Rif, which are the preiskim that take out the tamzis halacha from the Gemara with the mefarshim that are negeah to the, the, the Rif. He talks about then going to Beit Yesef. I'm sorry, then going to the Tur, come upon him on the siman that corresponds to the Gemara that you're learning. Learning it with the Beit Yesef, which, which hazers over the sugyas, including the Kor Yeshanim that are negeah to that. Then learning it in Shulchan Aruch Which is embodying the 𝔅ℱℱ of the 𝔚 and the 𝔇ℱℱ of the 𝔚, the 𝔓ℱℱ. And then if you have 𝔅ℱℱ on that, which will include the 𝔓ℱℱ, that's the 𝔇ℱℱ that he describes 𝔅ℱℱ. This is giving a year of clarity on Torah as it dictates how 𝔅ℱℱ, how it gives him his guidance in life. In Hilchot HaTorah, the Alta talks also about the 𝔅ℱℱ of HaTorah. The main emphasis is on learning Halachas Betaymeim, learning not just the Halachas, the facts, but understanding the Svarat they're behind them, which comes from the Gemara. In Kundeseitz Achayim, the basic Limud, by the way, he also calls it Halacha. Keeps on calling it. He doesn't call it like we call it the Sugia. Let's get the Sugia clear. He's-- 'Cause let's get the Halacha clear, Mishnah and Gemara. Let's get the Halacha clear in the

1:28:03 Speaker 3 Gemara. There are deeper levels of learning that he says are Shayeif, a little more advanced, but the basic framework of learning that Kundeseitz Achayim spells out is also clarity of what the Gemara is saying at the end and how it's embodied in Halacha. He doesn't stress the words of 𝔅ℱℱ in Kundeseitz Achayim, but you see from the Zechrenus as well, from the Rabbe, from, from Bachim that learned in Lubavitch, and Kol Yaetz from Mohammed's Beitzavot, he does kind of, uh, th-the disc- the discuss the 𝔇ℱℱ similar to the Midler of his Agdamah and Shulchan Rach at, at Rabbe. In, uh, the Sefer by Shmuel Sasank and Shmuel Batumer, Zechrenai Isai, he describes his moving through different Yeshivas, not Lubavitch Yeshivas. And he describes when he came to Lubavitch, he said, "We learned Alibud Hilchasa." He said, "We didn't spend time in Pupulim that we're trying to understand ideas that were not Neged to be Mevad HaHalacha. We were trying to get a clarity in Halacha Lemaysa." And he mamish goes through the same process that I mentioned before Bekitzer of going through Gemara, Rashi Tosfes, going through the Rosh and the Rif, and going through Toobey Yesef, and how it's expressed in Halacha Lemaysa, if it's applicable at the Mishkan Arech, or if not, the Mechavar and the Rama. This idea of Limud HaTorah is not just understanding Amkus of Torah, and I'm not taking that away. The Chachma of the Eibish is so deep that no matter how many Chidushim and how many Svaras

1:29:19 Speaker 3 we're gonna understand in the Eibish's Torah, there's even more, and there's even deeper. But you have to give a Talmuda feeling that there's a direction. You have to give the Talmuda feeling that this Torah is not just about deep information, it's about guidance in life. At least-

1:29:32 Speaker 5 I'm talking about it's not, it's not really done in Yeshivas, no?

1:29:37 Speaker 3 I think it should be done, I think it should be done more. I think it's-- this pathway should be accessible. I know there are others that are talking about it in, in public forums. And this-

1:29:44 Speaker 5 By the way, I remember a, a very-- a childhood memory. It was a big snowstorm when I was in sixth grade, not the nineteen ninety-six one, the next one. Like a historic snowstorm in New York, and barely anyone showed up to Yeshiva. But since I grew up, you know, across the street from Al-Atayrah, I was forced to go Nevach. I remember what my teacher did with the te- It was Rabbi Edelman was the teacher. What he did, he showed us, the sixth graders, how to do this. He taught us a Mishnah, Shtikl Gemara, and he went to the Rif, the Rosh, and he all the way down to Al-Atayrah. I remember, I remember then being blown away. They're like, "Oh, this is possible. You can-- This is the process of, of..." I, I just remember. I don't remember that so much in, uh, in, in, in Zaldam Sifta, but I remember that from sixth grade that one day.

1:30:29 Speaker 3 It's printed on the back of the Siddur. Chumash, Mishnah Yis, you know, till, till, uh, and the, one of the prints of Al-Tab Shulchan Arech, one of the songs of Al-Tab Shulchan, they added Al-Tab Shulchan Arech on the bottom 'cause it, it encapsulates everything. Oh, in Kundeseitz, uh, in Kol Yaetz Mohammed's Vidovi, he says, "Learn the Pasuk and Chumash. Go to the Mishnah, go to the Gemara, and go all the way down." This is a type of Limud, which number one, is more Shavalecha Nafesh, 'cause not everyone is Shayech to Krikh Nazayfil. But it also is a directed Limud, which is showing a Bacher, showing a Yid how Torah is a Hira Bachayim. It's not just Chachma because it's Chachma. It's Chachma because it's the Eibish's Chachma for you and showing you how you have to run, how the world has to run, how everything is meant to be following the Kavan Olgei-

1:31:11 Speaker 5 So why do you, why do you, why do you need to learn Gemara? Why can't it be like the, the Rambam writes in his Hagdama? They just learn Nach and then, uh, Mishne Torah.

1:31:20 Speaker 3 It's a good question, and Al-Tab in Techelam Sayid addresses that because you need to have Halachas Betaymeim. The Svaras are part of your appreciation of the Halacha. If you just have the dry Halacha itself, yes, you know the facts. The Gemara, which goes through the back and forth, and the Shaklav Ataya gives you the Svaras that are behind the Halacha. But when you have those Svaras connected to Halacha, it makes it more focused, more directed, and shows you more how this is all for me to appreciate. If I read that Machberes that I told you in that Mashal of the father that he gave to his child, if it would only be do's and don'ts, I don't know how long it would last. I think it would be harder for the child to appreciate. But if he had the context and he had a p-- and he appreciated where this is all going and what's behind all of this, I think the do's and the don'ts will come, will come easier, and will come with, with more Gishmek, with more Chayes. That's the purpose of Limud HaGemara, Halachas Betaymeim.

1:32:08 Speaker 5 Mm-hmm.

1:32:10 Speaker 3 And when you go to Limud HaChassidus, this is for sure the Vart. If you're going to Limud HaChassidus and you're not looking for Avinu Shaba Shanayim, you're not looking to connect to the Eibishter, yeah, you could learn it, and it's interesting things, and it's Gishmek. There, there's a Lashon that the, that the Rebbe Shad writes in Kundesat Filah, deals with the challenge that people have, that they're learning Chassidus, and it doesn't really have a deep effect on them. It's not really Niklat in them. It doesn't change them. And he says, "One of the reasons is, I'll tell you why. It's because when you're learning Chassidus and you just feel Chassidus is interesting, and it's like Gishmek, and it's nice, that has nothing to do with me. That's not about changing me. But if you learn Chassidus with 𝔗ℱℱ, if I remember correctly, that's the Lashon, that's gonna be a different Chassidus." I wanna draw you back to the Teshuv Chassav of Tes Chassidus. We started recently, Yutash Kislev, the new Machzor of Tanya. Some people focus on the Sharbalat, Perek Alef, Perek Beis. Hagdama Sama Laket is huge, but most people focus on the Shaklav Ataya about Yechidus versus a Sefer and how this is gonna solve all the problems and make it accessible. I'm talking about before that The way the Alter Rebbe is pointing to the Hasidim in that letter, written as a letter. "Aleichem ishem ekra. Shu moi lai reitz ve'tzadek mevakshe Hashem." Listen to these words. The Friediker Rebbe in the

1:33:38 Speaker 3 Sicha, I think in the Peys, he's encouraging learning Tanya Baal Peh. And he talks about Yud Beis Perakim famously. That's in the, uh, learn Yud Beis Perakim Tanya Baal Peh, the first Yud Beis. But with the Aleichem Ishim Ekra. He doesn't call it with the Hakadoma, with the Hakadoma. With Aleichem Ishim Ekra. That's the way he titled it. Now, Aleichem Ishim Ekra means, Alter Rebbe was saying, "I'm talking to ishim, to people. Anashim chashuvim, mention. I'm talking to people that are reitz ve'tzadek. They're looking for the Emes. They're mevakshe Hashem. They're searching for the Aibishter. And you're listening to me, and I'm going to provide you with answers to what you're looking for." If you're looking for the Aibishter, the Alter Rebbe has a lot to tell you. Not if, because the Alter Rebbe is addressing everyone. We're all looking for the Aibishter, but we have to remember that. We can't just learn Chassidus as a book, as a Sefer Halachos, theologia. Now, I was sitting next to somebody on the plane, so we struck up a conversation. So they asked me, "What do you do?" I told them, "I teach Jewish theologies." A goy, that's how I phrased it. Uh, but it's not just Jewish theology and Chochmah, theology means Chochmah of the Aibishter. Maybe if I said the right word, I don't know. Somebody will correct me. This is not what it is. It's understanding how I could connect to the Aibishter. It's the book that my father gave me to show me

1:34:54 Speaker 3 how I could access Him. If I learn Tanya, if I learn Chassidus in that way, that I'm a mevakash Hashem, I'm a reid ve'tzadek, I'm looking for the Emes, it's a, it's a different thing.

1:35:03 Speaker 5 I was once speaking to someone from Williamsburg, and he told me that there's shiurim in Williamsburg that, uh, that happens in, in Tehillas Chabad. He had something to do with it. The vagasham is part of it. So I asked him, "Are you, are you meshtatef in the shiurim?" He's like-- he says, "No, I'm nishke mevakash." So I'm like, "What? You fo-you fo-- I asked him, "You found the Aibishter already?" Like, "What do you mean you're not a mevakash?" Like, everyone's a mevakash. Okay.

1:35:30 Speaker 3 We sometimes think that a mevakash is like a weakness, you know, like, uh, uh, zucht malach. It doesn't have to be that you become flowery and you become echles, you know, tuduchni. It's, it's very simple. I, I realize who I am, and I realize what I'm meant to be, and I w-- I wanna get there. Like I mentioned before, the story of our father and our uncle and our cousin, they were all looking for things. They were looking for the Sh- he was looking for the shtetl. He was looking for mentchlichait, humanity in his life. He was looking for ein safe. You have to be looking for something. You have to be mevakash, but you're not searching Baruch Hashem on the street. You don't see people on the vakshen, and they don't know where to go, and they don't have the Emes. So we have the book in our hands. We have the Torah. We have the Chassidus in our hands. And if we're mevakash, then we'll be able to access it, and we'll be able to appreciate it. So, of course, you have to be mevakash. And by the way, the Emes rings true. And the Emes is maames atzmoi. Nicole Tzad, like the Loshen Ari Ba'al HaAgadah brings in Lekutei Sichos Chelch Vav. And Nicole did the Emes. So if you're looking and you're tack of looking, the truth is accessible, and you'll find the truth. So someone that's tack of looking, I believe, will get to the Emes. And you see, I

1:36:35 Speaker 3 think you see Bemukesh. Even the Vezuchin, come to Chassidus, come to Torah, come to Yiddishkeit. Every-everything else is empty. This is, this is the real stuff. That's the deepest, most real motivation for, for me to learn, for you to learn, for anyone to learn Torah. This is my Herodachayim. This is my guidebook for life. You know, it needs a little bit of Kabbalah Sohr. Um, I met once Reb Semikhah Werner, a Reb in the Chassid, lives in Monsey, who our family's connected to from the years that we were in the summer in Monsey, and then, uh, when we lived in Monsey. So we're having a conversation, and he says, "You know why your father has such nakas from his children?" Probably referring to you, Yossi, right?

1:37:16 Speaker 5 Mm-hmm.

1:37:17 Speaker 3 He said he's-- No, that he sees the family, Baruch Hashem, Kinder was-- that, that each one matzlich himself lo fi arech and has a hashpa'ah on others. He says, "I'll tell you why. It's because your father started with Kabbalah Sohr." I said, "What do you mean?" This is a story apparently that, that, that, that our father told him at one point, that when he first came to Crown Heights, he was looking for the Aibishter. Where do you find the Aibishter in Crown Heights? You know, looking for ein safe. So he was directed to, uh, Hadar Torah, and, uh, he wanted to go to the top. You know, who's, who's gonna tell me the Emes? So they directed him to the dean. The dean was a Yisroel Jacobson, and I think he's-- I think he went to his house, if I mem-remember correctly, and he knocked on his door, and, uh, he saw, you know, also he never saw a Yid with a board. You know, a Yid was up to chet eleven. Yeah, he had tzurt. He was about tzurt also, and he was blown away. Thought it was like a malach. And he thought he's the guy that could teach him about ein safe, but he didn't know the words, but about the Aibishter. And he starts asking him questions, and he's trying, you know, conversing in his English, and Rabbi Jacobson has also English, Yiddish, whatever it was. So he tells him, "You wanna learn?" I don't know the words it is, but

1:38:28 Speaker 3 he said, "You wanna learn? Come back to me in a suit." He wasn't dressed, you know, like, uh... He says-- And, you know, some people could have said, "Oh, this guy is, you know, getting concerned about how I look and how I'm dressed." He said, "Your father had the Kabbalah Sohr to shtel zich tzu." So there is a certain element of Kabbalah Sohr in the beginning, but after tzu shtel, there's no question about it. And it's not always gonna be that it's my geschmack, and that's what I'm looking for. And I'm not necessarily, I'm a vacach, like you said. And if I am a vacach, I don't know where I'm looking. I don't know what I'm looking for. There is a certain, you say, the Kabbalah Sohr, but at the end, to keep it going and to make it a lifetime thing and a permanent thing, a part of you, you need to access that nekuda of who you are, the bestayid, the hasan hasham. This is the deepest part of who you are. This is the real you. This is what I wanna be. This is what I, how I wanna live my life. Not just b'poel na'amesh, b'demai klei mashleim of my moyech, my lev. From head to toe, I wanna be embraced with the Aibishter. And the only way to, to, to, to change your mindset and to take and allow your mindset to be molded by the Aibishter is that your t- the Torah of the Aibishter is in your brain,

1:39:29 Speaker 3 and you're processing it, and you're understanding it, al lokim she'at migas, and you're directing your life accordingly. Be'emes, this is really what it means to kach zach Hamashiach. Kach zach Hamashiach doesn't just mean that all of a sudden we want something magical to happen. Look at the Rebbe's kach Hamashiach. Why does the Rebbe want Mashiach? And the Rebbe said, "If we're saying that we want Mashiach 'cause he's saying that we want Mashiach, then that doesn't work." That is from Pnei Atzivi. The Rebbe wants Mashiach because I want a Likkus to shine on me and to shine on the whole world. That's why I'm sending shluchan. That's why I'm encouraging you to learn to tell the mid-mes. This is my life. This is what I'm here for. So now, if I don't have Mashiach, I still didn't crack the code. I still didn't get it. I still don't have it. This You can't be on Beva- you can't want Moshiach and not be on Bevakash Hashem. That's impossible. You could say the word Moshiach a hundred times a day, but if you're not on Bevakash Hashem, and you're not doing things in your life to find the Ibushta, then, then it's a, it's a, it's a word.

1:40:30 Speaker 6 And wanting, and, and wanting to spread that to the world.

1:40:33 Speaker 3 The world.

1:40:34 Speaker 6 Yeah.

1:40:35 Speaker 3 How about the Moshiach is Gilul HaKodesh, is, is that you're passionate about Gilul HaKodesh.

1:40:42 Speaker 6 There's also another component that I'm thinking of. You know, you-- There's a certain Inyanim like, you know, Bekodey, Hashem Yeshad Misam Bechelev, you know, Teida, it's Misamakas. That's kind of related to what you're saying, but if, especially, if not, this is not s-specific for Yeshiva Bakar, probably not. If you're in the world, w- in the world generally, and I mean, in the world of Kipshute, it means that, you know, if, if you're running a life and you're married and you have children, there's always challenges. And if you're looking to live through those challenges and live from those challenges in, in, in the way that Teida and the Ebushta set it up, you're not gonna be able to access it unless you're a person that's tuned in and plugged into the limit that Teida on a regular basis. You're, you're not in the right zone. You're not in the right place. So that's just another... Maybe it's even Sheleiv Leshuv, but it's the same-- I mean, that's not Sheleiv Leshuv. It's, it's... But if you wanna, if you wanna be a Yid, so then you-- Then how, how do you access it? You know, there's so many distractions today, but, uh, you have to prioritize it. Limit the, whatever, limit the... And it's, it's also so easy today 'cause it doesn't have to be only when you are, uh, sitting and learning in the, the Shir HaMakvim, but it could be all the time, you know. Car, driving, it could be listening to positive things and

1:42:00 Speaker 6 being involved in Eish Evidabin in, in, in, in Kidusha. You know, so that's, uh, that's hopefully one of the points of this, uh, podcast that, uh, when you're not listening to Sikha or heavy shir, you can also have the inspiration around the Arum, the citizens, the Arum Deteida. It's about kind of all, all the same.

1:42:22 Speaker 3 Chatsi shir bitl teida. Someone once said, "What's the pshat chatsi? Could you be chatsi shir bitl teida?" Either I'm learning or not learning. If I'm talking about learning, it's chatsi shir bitl teida.

1:42:30 Speaker 6 Right. Exactly. Well, listen, if Fabringens is part of the dark esid, it's for this reason. Yeah.

1:42:36 Speaker 3 The Mendel Adonov used to tell, uh, Toronta that he once, uh, when he was like, I would say the equivalent like Mesifta age based on how he was describing himself. And there was a Magid Shir, I don't remember right now what his name was. His name slips my mind. And he had a time that he would finish his learning exactly when the say tehillim was finished. And one day, he finishes and there's a p-- uh, time left. So he felt like, you know, he miscalculated better. So he finished, then he says, "Today, because it's whatever the yem of the pagra, mashpiv et Fabringen tach." The Nissan came into the room and he Fabringened them. They were young bachims, it wasn't like a long drawn-out Fabringen. But the beginning of his Fabringen was, "Mevat lun talmud torah ipne chatzois hameitz vachnasas kala." I think it's a word that also says in Rabim, if I'm not mistaken, but he... This is the word how he said it. That you mevat lun talmud torah, there's two things. Right? Chatzois hameitz and achnasas kala. 'Cause that's what a Fabringen is. A Fabringen is taking out the meitz sheba Adam and achnasas kala. Kala is kleis ha Nefesh, the connection to the Ebushta and viewing that and internalizing that. Adam came in, came a Fabringen even at the time when it was, uh, set up, set up officially for learning.

1:43:43 Speaker 6 Right. Okay.

1:43:45 Speaker 3 Obviously, it was gonna bring learning.

1:43:47 Speaker 6 Okay. So hopefully, uh, there's going to be... The Rebbe always says a Fabringen. What's a quali- a qualification of a Fabringen? It's Chavos Achim gam yachad. The, the Achim over here, Kipshute. Then also a qualification of what a Fabringen is, it is a Chalatas Tevis. So hopefully, this discussion will, Halvai Shi will be Bahashemim. For us, it will be Meisif in our Limudat Eida, and for the, the Hashemim as well, that will benefit from it. Yeah, Shekeach for this Eidus.

1:44:18 Speaker 3 I want to just add one more thing. Uh, like based on what I mentioned before, that when you're looking for more of a plemistica motivation, it shouldn't be at the expense of other motivations. Look, somebody that's listening to this might say, "Look, I'm not at that point where I'm such a Bevakash Hashem like you're describing." I don't... I, I would, I would say not to believe yourself that quickly, but there has to be a cultivation of the basic things. One thing I don't think I mentioned before, which is more short-term. A Geshmak in your learning, a Hatzlacha in your, in your learning. Seichal is a Geshmak too? That's also... I, I... What I'm saying is something-

1:44:46 Speaker 6 Yeah, Echid, Echid is all the Mishalom for Tayinu because about Seichal, by the way.

1:44:49 Speaker 3 Yeah, for sure. For sure. So all these things are... A-anything that I said was not meant to be Memayit from, from even reward systems or whatever it may be that's gonna motivate a person to learn. It was just a little bit more, somewhat more of a plemistica cook, and I think something which is gonna make your learning a lifelong commitment and something that belongs to you rather than something you're doing because of the setting that you happen to be in at the moment, which is what sometimes Bakim Yeshiva think. We're learning because they want us to learn and because there's a say tehillim. No, no. We're facilitating you to be Matzliach for yourself. That's the attitude. Okay, not every Bakim is holding there, but you wanna, you wanna be able to get there. If you're not gonna be work on getting there, it's, you know, you're not-- you're gonna be a little bit frustrated. This is-

1:45:28 Speaker 6 Yeah

1:45:28 Speaker 3 ... this is really a Gulah.

1:45:32 Speaker 6 Yeah, and you see it. You s- you see, um, adults that might have gone through a phase that they're not appreciating learning, but then they mature a little bit, and they wake up, and they realize, "Wait, I need to have a kisit of lateida, and I need to... If they could take this seriously." So yeah, Yeshiva is supposed to cultivate that so you have it automatically, or you know how you have the tools. But, uh, anyone with a Mechbe Kotkade realizes the value of this and, uh, the importance of it.

1:45:58 Speaker 3 I just wanna mention one more thing. Uh, I, I talked about before our parents' journey. So, uh, the, the first Yechid, the Yechidus before the Hasana, which, uh, you printed I think, uh, the Lashon that Rebbe said in your chur of your Hasana. Was that where it was from? It's-

1:46:14 Speaker 6 For, for our sister's Hasana. We, uh-

1:46:18 Speaker 3 Okay

1:46:18 Speaker 6 ... we, uh, I printed it, yeah.

1:46:20 Speaker 3 You got the transcription, yeah. One of the things Rebbe says over there is-

1:46:23 Speaker 6 I can't transcribe it word for word. Beshait.

1:46:25 Speaker 3 So one of the things Rebbe said there is to spread Yiddishkite in a warm and generous way. So I wanna give you a Yashekeach. I mean, our parents, Baruch Hashem, tzalich gezunt a yonim, are continuing to do that. And, uh, I think doing that chailich hamaisif, I think much more than they were doing it when Rebbe first told them those words. So you see the words of the Rebbe being fulfilled in them. And Baruch Hashem is going to the next generation, so you could just continue to spread tehillim, mitzvahs, and Yiddishkite, and Bakir Chassidis, and Rebbes and Yanim in this warm and generous way. And generous means we're giving it to a lot of people. We're not just keeping this conversation for ourselves, but sharing with everyone whatever someone can take out of it, and, uh, then it's, uh, was a worthwhile endeavor if that's what happens.

1:47:09 Speaker 6 Okay.

1:47:09 Speaker 3 We should continue to have a lot of Hatzlacha and that's Shlichus.

1:47:12 Speaker 6 Okay. Kalam Avarech Mizbarech. Okay. So Yashekeach, and, uh, thank you very much. And you should, uh, zal zen Hatzlacha in all of this.

1:47:24 Speaker 3 Amen. Amen. Gam atem.