Yud Dalet Kislev: The Rebbe and the Rebbetzin's Wedding Day

00:00 In honor of Yudaleh Kislev, the wedding date of the Rebbe and the Rebbetsin in the year Tovresh Peh Tes, late 1928, we will discuss menhogim of this wedding as the Rebbe related them to Chassidim. This was later initiated at all weddings of Chassidei Chabad. At the Fabrengen of Shabbos Vayishlach, the 14th of Kislev Tovsh in Yudaleh, late 1953, the Rebbe cited many menhogim of this wedding. The Rebbe said as follows, Before the wedding of my sister-in-law, Rebbetsin Sheina in Tovresh Tsadik Beis 1932, the previous Rebbe instructed that the invitations should be copied from our wedding, the Rebbe and the Rebbetsin's wedding. And when I inquired about it, the previous Rebbe answered that this was also at his wedding and seemingly also from earlier weddings. In the Nusach, the version of the invitation, there are four paragraphs and the four paragraphs begin with four different letters that spell out the word Ahava. The Nusach of the invitation is also similar to the previous Rebbe's invitation as mentioned earlier and therefore also in his daughter's invitations, which the children's weddings, therefore the timing of the chuppah was cited in the invitation that it will take place at five o'clock in the evening. Whether the chassana was in the winter or the summer, they always wrote five o'clock in the evening. The chuppah by the Rebbe took place at night. As the Rebbe related, at my wedding the chuppah was very late because of an external reason, a sibachitzinges. The iksuva was written not close to the chuppah

02:17 but earlier in the day and the kabbalist kinyan, the transaction for the iksuva and they, them the witnesses, was all processed during the day and at the chuppah there was only the giving of the iksuva. The unterfirers, those that are leading, escorting the chassan kala, the Rebbe explains, at my wedding my parents were not present but also at my sister-in-law's wedding they were the father of the chassan and the father of the kala leading the chassan and seemingly the two mothers, mother of the chassan and the mother of the kala leading the kala. Under the chuppah the kala with the two sets of parents circle the chassan. While the chassan is being led to badekanish and then to the chuppah and also when the kala is led to the chuppah the Alter Rebbe's nigun is sung. The wedding ring should be of gold and smooth with absolutely nothing engraved on either the outer or inner surfaces. The previous Rebbe was particular even to remove a seal indicating the gold type. For the breaking of the kos there was no additional kos but that of which the seven blessings have been recited on and after the chassan and kala have each drunk a little from the glass of wine the Rebbe relates that it was given to someone called Meisha Aran and then it was broken. When they took the chassan kala to the cheder ha'yichud after the chuppah the cheder ha'yichud was in one of the rooms of the yeshiva Temcheit Mimim Lubavitch in Warsaw

04:15 where the wedding took place. The Friedrich Rebbe and his family travelled from Riga to Warsaw. Also the Kabbalas Panim took place in the yeshiva and the chuppah was in the chotzer in the lawn yard under the sky. The sunda was prepared in a hotel the Rebbe added with a smile as an American style. The previous Rebbe wanted that only the spiritual part of the wedding should take place in the yeshiva. On the entrance step to the room was laying a silver spoon and was instructed that not to step on it but over it. First the mechotanim entered and upon the instructions of the previous Rebbe everyone in the room besides the chassan kala walked out one by one. The previous Rebbe poured in a cup of tea for the chassan kala to break their fast and then he also walked out of the room. The Rebbe concluded this sicha. Hashem should help that we should have many happy occasions by Yidden and especially of weddings. A wedding by every individual is a general event in his life but by me through the wedding I was brought into general public affairs. This is a day that has connected me with you and you with me and together we will exert and bring the geulah ha'amites v'ashleimah, the true and complete geulah. Hashem should help that we see good fruit in our toiling. The Rebbe gave then of his cake to the older Chassidim who merited to partake in the Rebbe's wedding. The hemsech to the earlier

06:06 installment, B'negeah to Yud Dalet Kislev, the wedding date of the Rebbe and the Rebbetzin. We continue now with installment number two, discussing additional facts and quotes, B'negeah to this chasunah. In a sicha Shabbos Parshas Vayeshev of Alef Kislev Taf Shin Yud Dalet, late 1953, the Rebbe mentioned what the previous Rebbe said in regards to this chasunah. The previous Rebbe said as follows, "I am a mashbeh, as a sift through which a person pours, and then it goes further. When one drop is spilled to the side, they accuse the mashbeh. But for myself, I don't care. Even if they will invite everybody and not me, it won't hurt me, it won't bother me. But I hope that Hasidim will not desert me." The Rebbe concluded this sicha that from this we understand the great responsibility that we have on ourself, that when Hasidim conduct themselves n- in not an appropriate way, it also pertains and has an effect on the mashbeh, on the sift, and it is considered like something is poured to the side. And the Rebbe continues, "Indeed, because we did not listen to the previous Rebbe as we should have, and we were not mekushert him as we should have, so b'meile it was our responsibility what happened Taf Shin Yud, Yud Shvat." The Rebbe's referring to these talkes. And right after that, the Rebbe broke down and cried, and the Rebbe concluded, "But still, we live from his mouth also now from the hashpo'as that he's giving us, and b'meile, besides we

08:14 receive hashpo'as, we are obligated also in fulfilling the conditions of these chassidus. And that is not only by fulfilling his taconis, like saying the daily tehillim and so on, but also to learn his chassidus. And through this, we also draw down hashpo'as in gashmiyus, in the physical state." It was the first day, Rish Jedish Adar Alef Taf Shin Yud Alef, 1951, when the Rebbe came to the first wedding after the year of aveilus of the previous Rebbe, and this was the chasunah of Rab Leibel Pozner zal and his wife. When the Rebbe was there at the chasunah, the Rebbe interested himself, inquired b'negeah to the place where the chuppah will take place. Is it either gonna be an opening in the roof in order that the chuppah should be under an open sky, or the chuppah will be outside? When they told the Rebbe that they're considering making the chuppah inside because of the coldness of the winter, the Rebbe was not pleased with it. And the Rebbe said, "Also my wedding was in the winter, and the chuppah was outside under the open sky." And the Rebbe added with a smile, "And Baruch Hashem, I am pleased from the shidduch." The hemsech to the earlier installments, B'negeah Yud Dalet Kislev, the wedding date of the Rebbe and the Rebbetzin. We continue now with installment number three, discussing additional facts of this wedding, which the Rebbe mentioned on various occasions. On the second day of Rish Jedish Kislev, Taf Shin Dalet Mem, late 1983, the

10:07 two chief rabbis of Eretz Yisrael at the time visited the Rebbe. They were Rabbi Avraham HaKohen Kook and Rabbi Mordechai Eliyahu. During the yechidus, Rabbi Kook mentioned to the Rebbe that it is known that the Tzemach Tzedek had a close relationship with the Lithuanian non-Hasidic Jewish leaders. The Rebbe then said, "My father-in-law had a friendly relationship with Rabbi Chaim Azer Grudzensky and other rosh yeshivas, uh, of the time." Rabbi Chaim Azer Grudzensky was the Rov in Vilna up till World War II. And the Rebbe continues, "And they were all invited to my wedding, and they came and participated." On another occasion, the Rebbe related the following. During the chasuna sudde, my father-in-law went around the guest tables and distributed mashke and gave broches. When he approached the table where the talmidi haYeshiva, the talmidim of Yeshivas Tomchei Tmimim were standing, he instructed their mashgiach, their supervisor, to distribute mashke to each of the talmidim, and then he delivered a short sicha for them. The previous Rebbe said as follows, "Our sages stated that Torah does not exist, but only by one who sacrifices himself for the sake of Torah." And he continued, "You Tmimim should know you need to nullify yourselves completely, and this is what you should be going for. Study Torah with exertion, also the Talmud, and also Chassidus. And then I bless you." And the previous Rebbe continued with his broches. The study of Torah needs to be in the revealed part of Torah and also the concealed inyon of Chassidus, because

12:10 the revealed and The Chassidus are compared to body and soul, therefore both are needed. In the same sense that soul cannot be without the body, therefore there is a need to study Nigla, the revealed part of Torah. Likewise, a body cannot be without a soul, therefore there is a need to study Chassidus. On a third occasion, the Rebbe shared with Chassidim the following experience. During the suda of the Chassana, my father-in-law, the Rebbe, arose from his place to circulate amongst the guests and distribute cups of l'chaim. When I saw this, I felt that I could not remain seated while he was standing and giving out the drinks. So I arose from my seat with the intention of joining him and extending a hand to help, to hold the bottle or give out the cups, etc. My father-in-law saw me and motioned to me to remain in my place. Stubbornly, I tried again to rise and join him. And the Rebbe adds, a Yid is always stubborn, an action, and he again motioned very clearly that I should not leave my seat. I was consequently forced to remain seated. The expression of the Rebbe in Yiddish was, In English it is, on pins and needles, until my father-in-law returned and sat down again in his seat to resume the festive wedding meal. On another occasion, in one of the fabrengens in the early years, it was in the season of the Rebbe's, the Rebbetsen's 25th anniversary, the Rebbe elaborated on the maimer, the discourse that the

14:01 previous Rebbe delivered on the 19th of Kislev, which was in the middle of the Sheva Broches of the wedding. The timing of the maimer, the Rebbe explains, has a connection to Yutas Kislev. The main topic of the maimer focuses on an army being victorious in the war. And for this purpose, the king gives out all his cherished treasures, as he would seem to waste them, in order to win the war. This is the connection with Yutas Kislev. Since the general concept of the revelations of Pnimius HaTeira, the inner levels of Torah, through Chassidus, signifies the same idea, bizbus ha'etzis, pouring out all the treasures. The Rebbe explains that Kislev is the time of Gili Pnimius HaTeira, the revelation of the inner levels of Torah. And the Rebbe quotes the previous Rebbe that he said, Maim Echuton, referring to the Rebbe's father, is a Kabbalist. Therefore, he explained the wedding timing from a Kabbalistic perspective. But I, the previous Rebbe says, say that it is because Kislev is the third month, the month of Matan Teira of Pnimius HaTeira, the month of the giving of Torah of the higher levels of Torah. The Rebbe explains that in the same sense that Matan Teira at Mount Sinai took place on the third month from Nisan, the summer months, which is the Aveda of Tzadikim, likewise Matan Teira of Pnimius HaTeira took place on the third month from Tishrei, from Tishrei, the winter months, the Aveda of Bali Teshuvah.