Parshas Parah (5785) - "Nischarkemu Panav Shel Moshe" - feeling the pain of a fellow Jew

00:00 They tell a story about when the Rebbe Rashab was a small child and played with his brother. The Rebbe Rashab had an older brother, Reb Zalman Aharon, known as the Raza. The Raza was about two years older than the Rebbe Rashab. As children, they played, as children do, in the Rebbe’s courtyard. The children of the Rebbe Maharash grew up in the Rebbe’s home. They saw chassidim come to stay with the Rebbe, enter yechidus, travel to the Rebbe and return from him. So from time to time they would play a game of chossid and Rebbe. Once they played like this: the Rebbe Rashab dressed up as a chossid, and the Raza, the older brother, pretended to be the Rebbe. He sat down on a bench, as though he were the Rebbe sitting there. And the Rebbe Rashab, a young child of perhaps six or seven, or maybe even younger, prepared himself like a chossid: he put on a gartel, perhaps put on a hat, and made all the preparations one makes while standing at the door before entering yechidus. Then he went in to his brother, the Raza, as a chossid enters the Rebbe’s room. The Raza asked him, “What would you like to ask for?” He said, “I want to ask how to make amends for something wrong I did.” “What did you do?” The Rebbe Rashab told him that a few weeks earlier

01:43 it had been Shabbos, and he had not known about a halachah that the Alter Rebbe brings in the siddur concerning [unclear] nuts [unclear]. He did not know about this halachah, and he ate three nuts. He cracked three nuts on Shabbos and ate them. The Raza told him that, to make amends, he should say “Lechu Neranenah” from the siddur. And in general, he should daven from the siddur, even saying the blessings from the siddur. All right. A few days later, Rebbetzin Rivkah, the mother of the Rebbe Rashab and the Raza, became aware of what had happened. She had heard the conversation between the Raza and his brother. A few days or weeks later, she saw that his brother, the Rebbe Rashab, was not following through. He was not doing what he had been told to do. Once she asked him, “What about making amends for the nuts, and looking in the siddur?” The Rebbe Rashab said that it would not help him make amends. His brother would not be a Rebbe, so there was no value in what he said. That is what this little boy said, quite sharply. His mother asked him, “Why do you say that?” Rebbetzin Rivkah asked him, “Why do you say that?” And the Rebbe Rashab, who was, after all,

03:22 a child of six or seven, no older, replied: “Because he didn’t sigh. When I told him I had done something against the Shulchan Aruch, against halachah, he didn’t sigh. And if he didn’t sigh, his advice is no advice, and what he told me to do won’t help me make amends. The main part of a Rebbe’s answer is the sigh; only afterward comes the advice.” The Rebbe once told this story at a Purim farbrengen, [unclear]. And the Rebbe connected it to what is written in the Megillah. There is an entire sicha of the Frierdiker Rebbe explaining the Megillah, [unclear]. The expression “everything that had happened to him” appears twice in the Megillah. Once, when Mordechai told Queen Esther: “Mordechai told him everything that had happened to him, and about the money that Haman had promised to weigh out for the king’s treasuries in exchange for destroying the Jews.” [unclear] In the Megillah, regarding Haman, [unclear] “everything that had happened to him.” [unclear] Haman [unclear] with his family and told them “everything that had happened to him.” It is explained that “everything that had happened to him” [unclear]. What does this mean? “Everything that had happened to him”—that Mordechai, when Mordechai [unclear] “who encountered you on the way,” [unclear] and did not look at him. And [unclear] a form of “everything that had happened to him.”

05:03 “That had happened to him” means that he felt anguish over the suffering of the Jewish people. It is specifically on this point that the maamarim explain: Although Mordechai himself could have escaped Haman’s decree, and Queen Esther could also have been saved—the decree did not apply to them with full force—when Jews were in such a situation, he felt it all. “Everything that had happened to him” stirred deep bitterness within him, and he “cried out a great and bitter cry.” He felt their pain as though it were his own, and in truth it was. For him, on Purim, that was the meaning of “what had happened to him”: he felt another Jew’s pain. And not only did he feel anguish over the suffering of the Jewish people; he also brought about the reversal of Haman’s entire decree. This led to “Go, gather all the Jews,” and to the events that followed in the Purim story, right through to the end—“it was turned around.” In our parsha we find—as we study now, after Purim, on Shabbos Parshas Parah—the account and the mitzvah of the red heifer. The straightforward reason we study the mitzvah of the red heifer is the purification of the Jewish people: Pesach comes immediately afterward, and all Jews need to purify themselves so they can offer the Pesach sacrifice in a state of purity. This is done through the rites of the red heifer, and it is one reason we read Parshas Parah before Parshas Hachodesh. It is one of the preparations for the month of Nissan and the festival of Pesach. We find a very interesting Midrash. The Midrash says that whenever Hakadosh Boruch Hu taught Moshe the laws of impurity and purity, He told Moshe Rabbeinu both “its impurity and its purification.”

07:06 How one becomes purified from the impurity of a zav, from the impurity of a niddah, from the impurity of a woman after childbirth, from impurity caused by a dead body, and from the various forms of tzaraas impurity, and so on. For every type of impurity, He explained both its impurity and its purification: what purifies a person from that impurity, immersion in a mikveh, and so forth. All these laws of impurity and purity stated in the Torah appear in Parshas Emor, in the laws concerning the kohanim. The Midrash says: When Moshe learned the laws of impurity caused by a dead body, “He shall not become impure through a dead person,” and all the laws the Torah states in Parshas Emor concerning this impurity, Moshe Rabbeinu asked Hakadosh Boruch Hu, “How is one purified from it?” Moshe Rabbeinu wanted to know how a person could become purified from this impurity. The Midrash says that Hakadosh Boruch Hu did not answer him. Here, in Parshas Emor, we find no answer, and this caused Moshe Rabbeinu great anguish, to the point that the Midrash says, “Moshe’s face darkened.” His face darkened from pain, bitterness and distress, because he did not know how a person could become purified from this impurity. Time passed, until we reached the passage of the red heifer. Then Hakadosh Boruch Hu remembered that Moshe had asked, “How is one purified from it?” and answered him: “This is the statute of the Torah.” These are the laws of “They shall take for you an unblemished red heifer,” through which a person is purified from impurity caused by a dead body. We need to understand this Midrash: What happened here? Since Hakadosh Boruch Hu told Moshe Rabbeinu both the impurity and the purification for every type of impurity, why did He not tell him then how to be purified from impurity caused by a dead body? What is more, Moshe noticed that Hakadosh Boruch Hu was not telling him and asked, yet even then he received no answer, until “Moshe’s face darkened.” What does this mean? Was it to cause him pain? Surely all Jews needed to know this, and all the more so Moshe Rabbeinu. What was gained by delaying the answer to Moshe and others like him? Moreover, even when he asked, he received no answer until “his face darkened,” and only afterward was he told: Here, this is the way to become purified. What was it specifically about impurity caused by a dead body, more than the other forms of impurity, that caused “Moshe’s face to darken”? What happened here? What was this whole episode? What does “his face darkened” mean, and why does the parsha tell us about it? Well, here we come to the point.

08:49 The subject of the red heifer and impurity caused by a dead body is something to which Moshe Rabbeinu himself had no connection. Moshe Rabbeinu was above the entire matter of impurity caused by a dead body. Moshe Rabbeinu is a living man. Moshe Rabbeinu’s level is one where impurity caused by a dead body has no place at all, as Chassidus explains on the basis of the Gemara’s statement on this subject: “Moshe Rabbeinu did not die.” Moshe Rabbeinu is on the level of chochmah, “Wisdom gives life,” as...

10:14 Moshe Rabbeinu could not grasp the whole matter of the sin of the Tree of Knowledge and impurity caused by a dead body—the very existence of such a thing. What happened to Moshe Rabbeinu was an extraordinary development. This is what is meant by “Moshe’s face darkened.” He could not understand how such a thing could be. Of course, when we speak of impurity caused by a dead body, we are speaking of the spiritual dimension. Death in the world, as is known, came from the sin of the Tree of Knowledge. In essence, there is no place for death in the world. Moshe Rabbeinu, who was above the sin of the Tree of Knowledge, above the entire matter of sin, was, for his part, above the entire matter of death—the complete opposite of anything connected with death. How could there be impurity, that [unclear] impurity caused by a dead body [unclear]? Moshe Rabbeinu could not understand how he himself could [unclear] such a thing. How could he himself [unclear] such a thing, such a lowly state? This caused “Moshe’s face to darken.” And precisely because “Moshe’s face darkened,” the remedy could come about, because it touched him; it touched his heart. As the Rebbe, the mashpia, said at a farbrengen: the Rebbe brought out this point in a wonderful way through

11:37 There is a story chassidim tell about the Mitteler Rebbe, which the Frierdiker Rebbe recounts at length in a letter. Once, the Mitteler Rebbe traveled to Homil. When he arrived, hundreds of chassidim came from the surrounding area to enter yechidus and ask for guidance in serving Hashem, each about his own concerns. There was a long line. They stood waiting and waiting, going in one after another. Suddenly, the Mitteler Rebbe closed the door and said, “This is yechidus.” With a crowd of people waiting outside, wanting to come in, he stopped the line, shut the door and secluded himself in his room. The chassidim waited a few minutes, then a few more. Half an hour passed, then an hour, and nothing moved. The door remained shut and locked. The older chassidim went to see what was happening. Through a window that gave them a view inside, they saw the Rebbe sitting and saying Tehillim in tears, deeply broken. What had happened? Who knew? A long time passed. The Mitteler Rebbe came out and davened Minchah with [unclear]; it was an ordinary Wednesday. [unclear] and he delivered a maamar of Chassidus on teshuvah. For several hours he spoke about matters connected with teshuvah—a tremendously powerful maamar, delivered with great heartbreak. Only then, after all the [unclear], did he say, “Now let them come

13:00 and continue the yechidus.” And the yechidus continued in the usual way until he left, some days or weeks later. The chassidim wanted to understand what had happened. They went to ask the Mitteler Rebbe why he had stopped the yechidus, what that brokenness had been about, and what had led to the maamar afterward. The Mitteler Rebbe explained [unclear]. When a Jew comes seeking advice or asking how to correct a particular matter, the tzaddik, the Rebbe, must be able to feel that person’s concern as something that touches him personally in order to help him. He must find that matter within himself, even in its most subtle form. There are coarse forms of evil and subtle forms of evil, and he has to find the matter in a more refined form. For if, through Divine providence, this Jew came to me, then I have some connection to the matter. To help him, I must first help myself. Once I can identify the matter within myself, understand how it touches me and make the correction in myself, I can return to the chossid and help him. When a chossid comes to me—and this is how it works today as well—the Rebbe must put himself in the other person’s situation and take it personally, searching within himself for his connection to it. Only then, after helping himself, can he help the other person. This is a whole process that demands tremendous spiritual strength. A Jew came in and spoke about a particular transgression he had committed,

14:28 a coarse and lowly transgression. The Rebbe could not find within himself any connection to that Jew, to such lowliness. The Mitteler Rebbe had no connection at all to such lowliness, such coarseness, to something so crude. He could not find a connection to it. And that itself caused him terrible distress: How could I hear about this and say I have no connection to it? I must find this matter within myself. The very fact that I cannot find it in myself may indicate that I have a subtle form of evil so deeply hidden that even I do not know it is there. As Chassidus explains, sometimes there is hidden evil of which a person himself is unaware. This is a whole subject in Chassidus. That thought itself affected the Rebbe so deeply and stirred him to do the work of teshuvah. After all that work of teshuvah, he was again able to find how to help that Jew, and could receive him for yechidus. And the Rebbe said: This is the whole point of what the Midrash tells us here—that “Moshe’s face darkened.” Moshe himself was far removed from the impurity imparted by a dead body. After “his face darkened,” the matter touched him personally, and he felt the anguish that could

15:47 be experienced by a Jew who had sunk so low, who was in a state of impurity from a dead body—death, the opposite of life. All the other forms of impurity are impurity too, and some are severe, even very severe. But the opposite of life is something else. A person can be in a state of spiritual death, which the sefarim say is worse even than physical death. The vitality, the warmth, has completely dried up. That is death, impurity from a dead body, and it caused Moshe Rabbeinu’s face to darken. When “his face darkened,” Moshe Rabbeinu felt anguish and brokenness. This led him to ask Hakadosh Boruch Hu to give him the means of correction and tell him how the red heifer brings about correction for sin. From this we learn a lesson in serving Hashem, all the more so: Shabbos Parah always follows Purim and the idea of “all that had happened to him”—revealing the strength within a person to feel distress when a Jew is in an undesirable situation, whether materially or spiritually. When a Jew is in such a state, when his Jewish life is in a state of impurity from a dead body, it should stir in another Jew what it stirred in Moshe Rabbeinu: “his face darkened.” “All that had happened to him” must touch him personally. It is not enough to rush around giving advice, as though you were sitting in the seventh heaven, hovering by the Throne of Glory, while someone comes to you with his troubles and you advise him as an outsider. There must be a sigh, a willingness to listen as though it were your own concern.

17:16 Only then, after it has become your own concern, can you help the other person, because you feel what he is going through and it becomes personal. You can feel it, feel it inwardly, and give him advice and help. And the help will be given in the right way. There is a well-known saying of the Rebbe Maharash. He said: The verse says, “If there is worry in a person’s heart, let him speak of it,” and the Gemara says, “Let him put it out of his mind” and “Let him speak of it to others.” He should rid himself of the worry, and he should tell others about it. At first glance, these are two completely opposite things. Will “speaking of it to others” enable him to “put it out of his mind”? Will telling someone else make it easier for him? The Rebbe Maharash explained that these “others” must be others only in body—a separate person, but separate only physically. He is united with him and feels what he is going through. He feels for him, senses what he is experiencing and shares his distress. When such a person gives him advice—because there must be empathy in the world, feeling, the ability to feel another person’s situation—only then is the advice sound. That is the correction, and that is what Ahavas

18:43 Yisroel is about, what “all that had happened to him” is about. It brings us to the point where “all that had happened to him” is truly one with us, breaking the klipah of Haman, the klipah of Amalek, the klipah of evil in the world—breaking every Haman in this world. And this must happen immediately, right now. May things be good for the Jewish people as a whole and for every Jew in particular. May Hakadosh Boruch Hu bestow only goodness, every kind of goodness, spiritually and materially, in ways that are visibly and openly good, upon every Jew. And most importantly, may we merit the purification of the Jewish people and the red heifer; may we merit the fulfillment of “I will sprinkle pure water upon you, and you shall be purified; from all your impurities and from all your idols I will purify you,” and the complete Geulah through our righteous Moshiach. Amen, may it be His will.