Chukas: 5784 - "This is the statute of the Torah": What is the connection between the Red Heifer and honoring one's parents? Against the backdrop of the story of Dama ben Nesina | Rabbi Shimon Zonnenfeld, at the conclusion of the Daf Yomi class of…

00:02 Speaker 1 We are in Parshas Chukas, the parsha of the red heifer, which is called “the statute of the Torah.” There are many statutes in the Torah, but the symbol of a statute with no explanation and no reason is specifically the red heifer. That is “the statute of the Torah.” In this connection, the Gemara in Kiddushin tells an interesting story: “Rav Yehudah said in the name of Shmuel: They asked Rabbi Elazar, ‘How far does honoring one’s father and mother go?’” How far must a person go to honor his parents? “He said to them,” Rabbi Elazar answered, “Go and see what one idolater in Ashkelon did for his father. His name was Dama ben Nesina. The Sages sought to buy stones for the ephod from him.” He dealt in precious stones, and they needed precious stones for the ephod. But the key was under his father’s head, and his father was asleep. He did not want to disturb his father, so he turned them away. They wanted to pay him 600,000. He was not willing to disturb his father and wake him, and Hakadosh Boruch Hu rewarded him: the following year, a red heifer was born to him. The Sages of Israel came to buy the red heifer from him. They needed a red heifer, and when they heard that one had been born to him, they came to buy it. “He said to them, ‘I know that if I ask for all the money in the world, you will give it to me,’” because you will not find one anywhere else. I can ask for as much as I want. “I ask of you only the money I lost for my father.” And they paid him. This is a well-known story about Dama ben Nesina, but there are several things here that need explaining. First of all, Hakadosh Boruch Hu rewards measure for measure. What is the connection between the red heifer and honoring one’s father and mother? As a reward for honoring his father, Hakadosh Boruch Hu sends him a red heifer. Seemingly, there is no connection, and generally,

02:27 Speaker 1 when Hakadosh Boruch Hu gives a reward—and the same is true of punishment—it is measure for measure. That is how Hakadosh Boruch Hu conducts Himself. So what is the connection between the red heifer and honoring one’s father and mother? One explanation, and it is a very interesting one, is that what Dama ben Nesina said, and the reward he received, were an argument in favor of the Jewish people. Because a question could be asked: An idolater honored his father and mother to such an extent that he was willing to lose an enormous fortune, so much money, for the sake of honoring them. And for what? For a mitzvah that makes sense. Honoring one’s father and mother is the most understandable thing. Everyone understands that your father and mother brought you into the world, cared for you and raised you, so you should honor them. Even a non-Jew understands that he should honor his parents. True, Dama ben Nesina did so in a very, very exceptional way, but this is a mitzvah that makes sense. The red heifer, as we said earlier, is a mitzvah that is not merely beyond understanding; it actually runs counter to logic. It purifies those who are impure, while making those who are pure impure. It is contrary to reason. So this was an argument in favor of the Jewish people. True, this non-Jew was willing to observe a mitzvah that makes sense, and for the sake of honoring his parents he was willing to lose a great deal of money. But the Jewish people were willing to pay all the wealth in the world—

04:22 Speaker 2 for something they could not understand.

04:23 Speaker 1 For the sake of a mitzvah with no apparent logic: the red heifer. So this was an argument in favor of the Jewish people. Because one might ask: How is it that a non-Jew observes a mitzvah so meticulously? And another point: When he speaks to the Sages of Israel, he asks only for “the money I lost for my father.” So he is saying, in effect, that he lost something. What does he mean, “I lost”? You fulfilled such a great mitzvah! You honored your father. Is that a loss? Seemingly, it is the greatest gain. But nevertheless, he feels that he lost something. He lost out. He could have woken his father and earned so much money. So he still sees it as a loss. Even when this non-Jew did what he did, he has that feeling. And it is written, “The kindness of the nations is sin”; “All the good that idolaters do, they do for themselves.” True, he fulfilled the mitzvah, but he feels that he lost something. The Jewish people are willing to pay all the wealth in the world to fulfill the mitzvah of the red heifer, a mitzvah they cannot understand at all. That is the special quality of the Jewish people. That is the special quality of a Jew. May it be Hashem’s will that we soon merit the true and complete Geulah.

05:34 Speaker 2 Amen.