Connection to Essence | Episode 3 | Beyond the Externality

00:00 Speaker 1 Connecting to the Essence. We’re here with another episode. It’s fun for us to talk, and we have so much value to offer the world.

00:10 Speaker 2 Why, though? Why are you saying that as a joke?

00:11 Speaker 1 Why am I being cynical about it? Because at the end of the day, we live in a world where everyone has a podcast, because everyone has a lot to give. Which is both true and not true. I mean, if you have something to say, say it. Why do other people need to hear it? But I do believe in this platform, because a conversation between two people can draw other people in, and a podcast is a good platform for that.

00:36 Speaker 2 But really, from the very beginning, we talked about how every person has their own point of influence. It spreads in circles, and that’s so precise. I mean, whoever hears this will probably be the person who—

00:48 Speaker 1 Exactly.

00:49 Speaker 2 Even if, in the end, it’s just one person—that’s how I look at it. If one person listens and takes something from some little thing I said, something I wouldn’t even have thought was the point, then as far as I’m concerned, on that day, this was part of our shlichus in the world.

01:01 Speaker 1 Right, and that’s why I believe in this platform. Why did I say it cynically? Because it’s like, who are you? What do you have to say? What do you have to offer?

01:11 Speaker 2 Because who are we? Nothing. If we—

01:13 Speaker 1 If we really connect to the essence.

01:14 Speaker 2 If I’m really here for myself, I believe it amounts to absolutely nothing. I mean, we could just turn off the camera. Though I really don’t think I’d be doing this for myself.

01:23 Speaker 1 Mm-hmm.

01:24 Speaker 2 I really mean it. That’s why I think it’s...

01:27 Speaker 1 So, let’s go.

01:28 Speaker 2 So we can carry on.

01:29 Speaker 1 What are we talking about today?

01:31 Speaker 2 Should I bring it up?

01:33 Speaker 1 Do you want to?

01:33 Speaker 2 You, you—that’s your job.

01:35 Speaker 1 Oh, okay. I do want to say one thing first. We talked about how you managed to pinpoint your shlichus and purpose as “connecting to the essence.” Recently, I managed to pinpoint mine: I call myself someone who brings light out into the open.

01:48 Speaker 2 Right.

01:48 Speaker 1 And we’re in a generation with so much light. People reach out to me, and I know I can’t get to everyone, because ultimately we’re limited by time and space. But if you have light, bring it out. Go out there, because light upon light upon light—that’s how the Geulah comes. In the previous episode, you mentioned that you and I don’t look the same, didn’t study in the same places, and things like that...

02:19 Speaker 2 The most external of externals.

02:21 Speaker 1 Which is all external, the opposite of connecting to the essence. And I think people who meet you very quickly pick up on your sincerity, on who you are—that’s the essence. That’s why I called it [unclear] and all those things. But ultimately, we live in a world of—

02:41 Speaker 2 Appearances.

02:42 Speaker 1 Ultimately, we live in a world where people see and are seen. It’s not just virtual: you meet the person, and there’s judgment, and there’s that question of... How do you deal with that judgment? How do you want the world to see you? How do you want to see yourself? I’m sitting here with you, and as I said in the previous episode, what you talk about is Chassidus and Hakadosh Boruch Hu. You live with Hakadosh Boruch Hu with such unquestioning certainty. He’s present with you, not just during davening or at specific times of day. But that does clash a little with the way we were brought up and with what we’re familiar with. Ultimately, in terms of outward appearance, you don’t fit into that box...

03:41 Speaker 2 Interesting. That’s intriguing. The first thing that comes to mind as you say that is that, ultimately, everything happens inside us. In my view, everything outside is an illusion. The world is an illusion, ultimately, and everything happens inside us. Our inner world projects outward; it projects onto the external world. So even when I encounter that, I always come back to myself. Say I feel that people are judging me one way or another, or that I don’t look a certain way—I come back to myself and ask, wait, is there something you’re not at peace with? Where does this touch a nerve for you? Where do you judge other people? Because I know for certain that with things I’m at peace with... There have been far more striking situations. By nature, I tend to break new ground. I do things—often I just live that way without even realizing it, because I was like that as a child, too. I did what seemed right to me, the way I saw things, and only years later would people say, “You know, that was...” Here’s the simplest example: I bought an electric scooter because I needed to get around Kfar Chabad. I didn’t have a driver’s license—I’d been struggling to get one for about seven years. So I bought a scooter. I came to Kfar Chabad and thought, I need to get from point X to point Y. An electric scooter seemed like an amazing solution. I rode it, and years later people started saying, “Oh, you were the one with the scooter?” It was like, “You, with the scooter? You were the first one in Kfar Chabad.” To me, it was such a simple thing. I needed to get from one place to another.

05:04 Speaker 3 And it wasn’t acceptable?

05:06 Speaker 2 It really wasn’t. If you’re asking how unacceptable it was—it was so unusual that—

05:10 Speaker 3 But why?

05:12 Speaker 2 Because nobody—even men hardly rode—

05:14 Speaker 3 Was it an issue of tznius?

05:15 Speaker 2 When I bought it, even men hardly rode scooters in Kfar Chabad. It just wasn’t done.

05:19 Speaker 3 I don’t know why.

05:20 Speaker 2 No, I don’t know why.

05:21 Speaker 3 Okay.

05:21 Speaker 2 But I didn’t understand that, either.

05:22 Speaker 3 You just didn’t see it—you didn’t understand where people were coming from.

05:24 Speaker 2 I didn’t. I took the scooter—

05:25 Speaker 3 But, but—

05:26 Speaker 2 But what I’m saying is—sorry, let me finish—why didn’t I see it as strange or unusual? People brought it up in workshops, too: “Oh, you were the one with the scooter.” Because I was completely at peace with it. It was clear to me, one hundred percent, that what I was doing was perfectly fine. I had no doubt, not even a shadow of a doubt. I have more examples if you want, but I won’t...

05:47 Speaker 3 What interests me, though, is where kabbolas ol fits in for you. Do you have that? Do you have kabbolas ol?

05:56 Speaker 2 Wow, that’s a huge question. Because at the core, absolutely. What is kabbolas ol? Bittul? I mean, there are so many things I do with what feels to me like complete bittul, self-nullification. That—

06:06 Speaker 3 That demand something of you, that [unclear].

06:09 Speaker 2 I didn’t think I’d talk about this, but I’ll think about how to put it. In my everyday, personal life, I chose—I think I chose—Hashem sent me the most amazing husband in the world, truly. If we’re talking about spiritual teachers, then to me he’s the most Chassidic person, with the loftiest soul I’ve ever encountered. But in terms of his actions, and how he defines himself—

06:34 Speaker 3 Day to day, yes.

06:35 Speaker 2 He doesn’t define himself as a religious person. Our perspectives on faith are different.

06:42 Speaker 3 In other words, you’re in a mixed marriage.

06:44 Speaker 2 Mixed, exactly.

06:45 Speaker 3 Mm-hmm.

06:46 Speaker 2 And within that marriage—first, I do want to say, as an aside, that I think my closeness to Hashem has grown many times over because of him.

06:54 Speaker 3 Why is that?

06:56 Speaker 2 Because after we got married, anything I wanted had to be mine. Whatever I wanted, there was someone pushing back a little, asking, “Why do you believe in that?” And I’d stop and ask myself, “Wait, why do I believe in that?”

07:09 Speaker 3 Wow.

07:09 Speaker 2 And I’d go back and examine it. I do a lot of work there. “Why do you go to the mikveh? No one knows. You could choose not to go; nobody in the world would know.”

07:18 Speaker 3 Wow.

07:19 Speaker 2 “That’s between us.” And I say, “No, that’s bittul.” Actually, speaking of bittul, that’s why this whole subject came to mind. At the mikveh, I feel that you’re in a state of complete bittul. You’re under the water, and you—I always get chills—

07:32 Speaker 3 You said that about this mitzvah.

07:33 Speaker 2 Right, but at the moment of immersion, I say, “I’m in a state of complete bittul before Hakadosh Boruch Hu.” So—

07:38 Speaker 3 But you’re in a state of bittul and connected to the essence in the deepest way.

07:41 Speaker 2 Right, and that moves me.

07:41 Speaker 3 It seems that any woman who observes everything, every detail, minor or major, would feel it. That’s what gives me a kind of—I don’t like the word jealousy, but a kind of healthy envy—of where you are in the processes you’re going through, of your connections, of how connected you are to it. But then I did ask you: where does kabbolas ol come in?

08:07 Speaker 2 So I’m saying that in my life, at so, so many points, I feel that I’m setting myself aside, that I do things because that’s what Hashem wants. I could be at home on Shabbos and go out for a walk, and no one would know. I could do—really—

08:21 Speaker 3 So that’s fear of Heaven. Ultimately, that’s fear of Heaven.

08:24 Speaker 2 I feel that I’m setting myself aside. I know that—so why do it this way? That’s it. Now, there are lots of things people see as external, and I don’t feel connected to them through some deeper process. I actually see it the other way around. I always wear leggings. I feel much more modest that way. Really, I sit on the floor all the time. To me, it feels very modest. I feel covered. It isn’t accepted, but it isn’t immodest. And with almost everything, if we get into the details, there’s an answer. And a lot of things are really my own path and what I’m going through. Right now I’m also at a place where, ultimately, I’m comfortable. I mean, we talked about body image too, and I feel love and compassion for my body, and joy in my body, when I—when this is my style. Now, it doesn’t look like the Chabad girls, but I’m not—but I don’t have to—

09:20 Speaker 3 What do you mean? You grew up in the system, in the framework you went through. You did go to Chabad schools and followed the whole path.

09:29 Speaker 2 Right.

09:31 Speaker 3 Was that hard for you?

09:32 Speaker 2 Yes.

09:32 Speaker 3 What was hard about it?

09:34 Speaker 2 Everything.

09:34 Speaker 3 Who are you to tell me what to do?

09:36 Speaker 2 Yes. First of all, who are you to tell me—

09:37 Speaker 3 Did you have G-d in your life then?

09:39 Speaker 2 Yes.

09:40 Speaker 3 The whole time? All those years, did you have G-d in your life?

09:42 Speaker 2 I had G-d in my life, and there were also periods when it got mixed up with “I’m G-d.” I mean, I always had that—certainly in high school, I think I was going through a period when I felt everything was in my hands. I had an incredible amount of influence in my class, in the high school generally, and even with the staff. I felt that people who were key figures at the high school somehow liked me, and I had—today I say it was through Hashem’s mercy, it was a miracle, and in the end I did what I wanted. I had permission to have a phone, I had permission to wear a red tank top outside, I had permission—I was, I was—

10:17 Speaker 3 How did you get those permissions?

10:19 Speaker 2 Through charm, kindness and mercy. I don’t know, but that’s how it was. I had permission for the phone because I was in charge of the Chabad House. As for the tank top, they somehow decided not to see it. I don’t know, the shirt and so on. And ultimately, it lets me—I feel good this way, comfortable. I feel like myself, connected to myself, when I dress in a way that feels comfortable inside. If I have to put on something I don’t connect with, I don’t feel connected to myself.

10:47 Speaker 3 Mm-hmm.

10:47 Speaker 2 So again, there are many levels of—

10:49 Speaker 3 But then you’re saying—and look what’s remarkable here. In the end, what do we see? We see a person’s external appearance, which is their clothing. And the least pleasant word for it is “modesty,” with all the rules of modesty—

11:03 Speaker 2 Yes.

11:03 Speaker 3 Which, again, who decides? What do they decide, and how much?

11:05 Speaker 2 Right, and that’s why I didn’t want to get into it. But I think that if we went into each thing, I’d have some kind of—

11:11 Speaker 3 No, it is interesting. Why don’t you want to get into it?

11:13 Speaker 2 Because each thing is its own subject. Ultimately, there’s what’s accepted. I mean, there’s a sense of what’s appropriate, and I’m not against that. There is such a thing as what’s accepted. It isn’t accepted to walk around Kfar Chabad with—say, Rebbetzin Chaya Mushka would wear short sleeves, but today it isn’t accepted; it’s considered immodest. Okay? Red nail polish is accepted. Where you are, it isn’t accepted. Makeup is accepted.

11:35 Speaker 3 There are rules, okay.

11:36 Speaker 2 A girl in high school can’t wear makeup because it isn’t accepted. But I don’t feel that in my day-to-day life. I mean, I have an inner way of going about things; I don’t experience it that way.

11:43 Speaker 3 Mm-hmm.

11:44 Speaker 2 And every so often, when I do start thinking about it, I get feedback from outside almost immediately. Because if I’m preoccupied with it—

11:52 Speaker 3 Preoccupied with what?

11:52 Speaker 2 With not fitting in, say, and the thought comes up for me—

11:56 Speaker 3 Mm-hmm.

11:57 Speaker 2 Within twenty-four hours, someone will say something to me about it. It always happens that way. It’s like—

12:02 Speaker 3 It’s as though you get that reflection right away.

12:04 Speaker 2 Yes. And then I say, ultimately, everything—the inside and the outside—is one. So I’m not encouraging people—I’m not coming along and saying, “Dress however you want.” But I do encourage every person to be connected to themselves, to their strengths, and, secondly, not to judge, not to look only at the outside. But ultimately, the people you’re in contact with—your classes in Kfar Chabad. Right. And your workshops are also for a Chabad community and things like that. So I absolutely— Yes. Absolutely. And it isn’t about the parents, by the way, or the adults. It’s specifically about the children. I always come dressed modestly and covered. No matter what— According to their standards of modesty? Uh, yes. Yes and no, but yes. I mean, I might wear leggings, because I sit on the floor with the children— But with a skirt. But—of course, with a skirt. So you do adapt yourself to the style there. Why? Because ultimately, I feel that the pure, wonderful, sweet children I meet shouldn’t be drawn into this at all. I mean, I know there’s— There’s no need to create a conflict here. No conflict at all. And secondly, I’m comfortable being covered from head to toe around children. There’s something about it: I’m not the point here. There’s no reason in the world for a child to have to stop and think, or be confused, or not understand why his teacher, his kindergarten teacher, looks like that. By the way, this has nothing to do with religion. I think that even in a school with teachers—whether it’s a mixed school or whatever—a teacher should come dressed respectfully and be covered. Mm-hmm. Because I think it shows respect for the child. So, of course, when I

13:45 Speaker 2 come to workshops and classes, I certainly come dressed appropriately. I know the rules too, and when I come to a workshop or to speak— But do you feel like you’re putting on an act there? Sometimes. Sometimes, yes. And how does that feel? When I remind myself that I’m there for something much more real and essential, then it’s all fine. Which is connecting to the essence. Yes. But when I don’t remind myself, of course it’s hard for me. But I am working on— And if someone comments, if someone comments on your modesty, how do you feel? It happened to me once in my life. When I came— Someone only commented once? No, I always came dressed appropriately. Once I came to a workshop where I actually felt I was dressed appropriately, but the woman there, a school principal—it was a workshop for the staff—said, “You have to put on another skirt.” I was wearing a dress and leggings, and she said the leggings weren’t allowed to show. It was a very humiliating experience, very. But in that moment I weighed it up. I said, either I throw everything up in the air and leave— Mm-hmm. Or I humble myself for a moment and remember that I’ve come to give something. It has nothing to do with my appearance. And I did the entire workshop wearing a strange skirt. I looked like a clown, and I did it. Mm-hmm. So in these processes, you do know how to set yourself aside. Meaning, kabbolas ol isn’t really—this isn’t your struggle with kabbolas ol. Before Hashem? Of course it is, but— How do you manage your relationship with Hakadosh Boruch Hu? No matter what, it’s easier for me to set myself aside before Hakadosh Boruch Hu, because that feels the most— How do you know what He wants? Good question. There’s confusion for us about whether it’s what He wants or what the rabbis decided. So I do—I first challenge everything. I mean,

15:18 Speaker 2 I’m willing to confront everything—every piece of content that comes up, on any subject. I don’t keep Shabbos just because, just because that’s what you do. Once I decided I was in this one hundred percent, I studied, I’m studying, and I connect with it. And as we said about Chassidus, there’s an answer there for me. It’s always—it’s like medicine. What is studying Chassidus for you? Medicine. If I—medicine, exactly. What do you study in Chassidus? Everything. But, like, I buy the Dvar Malchus every week—I buy all the issues I see for weeks ahead—and I just feel... You’re walking on thin ice all the time, what can I tell you? I always read the first maamar and flip through it, but for me it’s really... And even if I’m not doing well, by the way, and someone comes and studies with me, it heals me in the end. Truly. Not just for... What is it? Explain it to me. It pulls me out of... I don’t know how to explain it. So what’s the medicine in it? It immediately gives me antibiotics for the soul. Boom—it lifts me up that very second. Really. And you know what it reminds me of? I remember I had two girls in my class who are sisters. They don’t like coming together, and they don’t come together. But there were times when one girl was absent, and I remember that once their mother sent them both. The older one really insulted the younger one; she was really mean and refused to sit with her. I took her outside and tried to talk to her, and tried and tried, and in the end I said, “Listen, I don’t know if what helps me will help you.

16:53 Speaker 2 Don’t do it for yourself; don’t make up with her for your own sake. But you know that when you make peace with your sister, you’re making peace in our world. In the end, we’re a tiny point in all of this.” I said that to her, and I wasn’t thinking, What am I saying to an eight-year-old girl? Where did that come from? That very second, everything changed. She went in with her sister, sat through the class, and that was that. But, but, but those are the difficult moments. But do you know what you did there? What did you do? I told her the truth. You saw her. You didn’t judge her, and you spoke to her G-dly soul. But I think I’d seen her before that too, and I’d tried to see her and her sister, and in the end... You pulled her out of the mud. You simply lifted her out. It was like a cry from the souls. But that’s my experience. That’s my experience: no matter what, if we sit down for a moment and talk, and study it, and understand that we’re a tiny point in all of this... So Chassidus, you’re saying, is healing for you? Oh, absolutely. Absolutely, absolutely. What do you study? Well, there are things I connect with more. First of all, there’s a course I take. I could promote the course I’m studying now, but there’s an amazing woman—amen, amen, amen, may we have her on the podcast sometime. Amen. Her name is Eti Hirsch, and she teaches something called the Code of Transformation and Soul Consciousness. And you know me—anyone who knows me a little knows I don’t get carried away. I really love people, but I don’t look at someone from above. From below. From below, sorry. From above... from anywhere. I feel very much on equal footing with everyone.

18:37 Speaker 2 And I feel equal with her too. But what I’m saying is that she teaches, at the most basic level, about the soul’s DNA that every person has. Then what happens when you encounter a situation? How do you work through it in the world of Asiyah and the world of Beriah? Atzilus, Beriah, Yetzirah, Asiyah. But you go in reverse, from the bottom up. Each time you rise another level and transform the situation. Everything that happens to you is either a tikkun or a lesson, and the question is what you do with it. I’ve studied with her for years. I’ve also... I’ve read; I don’t stick with anything for too long. And whenever she talks, I ask her, “But isn’t that in Tanya? Isn’t that in this other place?” And she says, “Yes.” Because she draws from Kabbalah, from here and there, but in the end it’s all one. Mm-hmm. I really recommend it, by the way. No, I mean, I’m talking to you and you say to me, “Yes, that’s exactly your code.” Right, I need to understand what this “code” is... True, but that’s eight podcasts. How could we cover it in one? How would we learn it in another episode? But I am interested in your relationship with Hakadosh Boruch Hu. What is it? It’s everything. Hmm? It’s everything. It really is everything. How can I explain it? It’s everything. So throughout the day, is your inner conversation about what He wants from you and whether you’re doing what He wants? No, I don’t think that’s what drives it, that that’s the conversation. But I really feel Hashem. Do you see hashgachah pratis? In everything. It isn’t even just hashgachah pratis. It’s in everything. I feel that Hashem... Do you feel, do you see G-dliness? Again, it sounds like

20:07 Speaker 2 big words, but I really feel that we’re one, that everything is Hashem. I really feel it. Sometimes I post a status saying, “Everything is Hashem, and Hashem is everything,” and then I read it afterward and think, Wow, how does that sound all of a sudden? But that’s my experience, my experience of being alive. And do you bring Him into your classes? Of course. Is He present there? Is Moshiach present? He’s present in everything, and He’s present... We... I do a lot of guided visualization with them. In the visualization, I say that we send a ray of light from our souls to everyone... First we say, “A girl, a girl.” I usually do it when I see that a child has come in and isn’t doing so well. I believe in healing as a group, and I always say that we create... each of us says thank you to Hashem. Of course, it’s... gratitude to Hashem. But everything, everything is Hashem. I don’t know; I have no way of separating it. Mm-hmm. Everything—the fact that we’re sitting here together right now, the home, the workshops, my journal—everything. Every piece of content I write for workshops, I feel that... Anyway, it’s obvious, isn’t it? Obvious? It isn’t obvious. I did see it in the workshops, because we just sat together—I helped you with the catalog, which, with Hashem’s help, you’ll finally put out—and I got to understand your workshops and the kits you produce. And when you first told me about “Ana nafshi ksavis yehavis”—“I wrote and gave My very self”—in the word “Anochi,” then, as I started looking closely at your workshops, I said, “Oh my goodness, you put your whole self into them, literally all of your ‘Anochi.’” But the world isn’t a vessel for that. Try to bring it down to a level it can receive.

21:44 Speaker 2 In a way that... And then we saw that you really do take people through the four worlds within this process of connection. Right. And Hakadosh Boruch Hu is there—it's a workshop where, in every possible way, you bring Hakadosh Boruch Hu to the person taking part, whether it's a workshop you lead or a kit through which you share yourself. It's simply amazing. Yes, you really brought me down to earth when you read the content and said to me, “Ana Nafshi.” Dvar Malchus—you'd put the whole Dvar Malchus in there. And I hadn't seen it at all. I hadn't seen it at all. To me, it was just so obvious—and then I said, okay, I felt you were a shliach for me in this, because I needed to write things out. Yes, so I started making it simpler and simpler. It was a fascinating process of refining and getting it just right. It still challenges me. Why? First of all, I think my starting assumption is always that everyone knows everything and understands everything. Even in workshops, I can say something, finish explaining it, and then people say, “Wait, but I didn't understand how to do it.” And I'm stunned. What—what do you mean? Then I realize it's my problem. It's really the ABCs of leading a workshop. Right, so these days I say, “Listen, I really do have this problem.” I also speak relatively fast, and I really work on that, and I try to remember that not everything is self-evident. What's obvious to me isn't necessarily obvious to someone else, but that doesn't occur to me, so I can just start talking... On the other hand, I always say I'm willing

23:19 Speaker 2 to hear feedback. I'm happy to hear what people tell me. So I was glad when you said, “Make it simpler.” I said, okay, that's what I need to do. But what was surprising about that particular workshop, whose content you read, was that I suddenly got the most feedback on the content. That was really interesting. And then I said, what does Hashem want from me? Hang on—suddenly there are these two voices. I want to listen to both of them. But what do I do? So, I don't know... I think you did take it—even though you didn't remove the content in the end, you arranged it in a way that follows the process more clearly. Could be. And then it's easier to take in. And it turned out to be amazing that all your workshops and all your kits really follow the four worlds, because that's the essence of connection. Yes, right. I remember—I didn't like it when you really wanted me to write “Connection to Atzilus,” “Connection to Beriah,” “Connection to the World.” Yes, and I still haven't written that. Okay, so what are the names in the end?

24:15 Speaker 2 Connection to... myself, my surroundings, to... Connection to Myself, to My Surroundings, to the Essence. What Am I Taking With Me? That's the world of Asiyah. Yes, but... no, it was hard for me. I felt it was too grand, like I was putting these big headings on things, and in short, setting myself up for a fall. No, but I think the catalog will help people make sense of what Connection to the Essence is and what they go through—the processes they go through there—whether they've bought a kit or come to a workshop. You know, when you say that, I suddenly get anxious. I think, what if someone hears this and it somehow raises their expectations, and I just want to... Expectations of what? I don't know, that something big will happen... I mean, again, I know what happens with the kit, but suddenly we're sort of doing a promo for the kits or the workshops. But these are things you're already doing with... Right, and still I suddenly feel this pressure when you define it that way. Because I do this all the time, in the classes too. I don't put headings on it at the end, and I know people understand, and it's all fine—I'm comfortable with it. Suddenly, when everything has headings, I think, that's such a big commitment. There's a responsibility here, no question. Yes. From where I stand, the way I see it, once you—as you said—turn the way you do it into a model, and I know, maybe I need that to put things in order for myself, maybe because of my attention issues, I don't know. It helps me too, though. Once there's a model, you can take in that whole capsule, and then I... You send out a kit; you're not there leading the workshop. Right.

25:48 Speaker 2 But when you send it out, you don't want it to be just a craft workshop. Absolutely not. These days, people can do a craft project on their own. They've seen the picture; they can make it themselves. What I want is for them to understand the process, what's happening there. Right. I remember telling you that, as far as I was concerned, sending people just the content and the kit—because you said, “No, let them choose whether they want the content”—I didn't understand what you wanted from me. If they just want a craft project, they can go buy one... Fair, but... But in the end I suddenly understood that this, too, is Connection to the Essence. They need the world of Asiyah. Yes. And that will connect with all the worlds. So when is the catalog coming out? Look, it could be that by the time we finish this episode, the catalog will already be out. It already is, I think. It is. Okay, Sara'le. Whoever works on it will meet Chani. Chani turned it into... Speaking of the catalog, you should know that I came to Chani to create a bot, actually. I think I mentioned that once. And we ended up with a catalog. So I simply recommend this: if you want to make something and don't know exactly what you want, just talk to Chani. Maybe she'll create a podcast for you; maybe she'll create... Or LaOr. You never know, you never know. You never know. I'm very curious—that's what... So that's my recommendation. No, it's about being a channel. You know, I also say that I don't have ideas of my own. After all, what's an idea? It's copywriting. Copy means copying. Where do you copy from? From the Infinite. Hamsa. When that muscle is very, very well honed and you really are a channel,

27:13 Speaker 2 I'm grateful for every idea. A lot of ideas pass through me, baruch Hashem. I simply thank Hashem for choosing to send an idea through me. And sometimes I'm also a little upset with Him for sending amazing ideas through other people. I'd like some of those too. Yes, but that's perfectly fine. It's incredibly freeing, and it feels so good. So thank you, Sara, for another episode. It's such a pleasure talking with you. As far as I'm concerned, I could sit here for hours more. Me too, but we'll stop for now. Okay, thank you. Thank you so much. Wait, give me a quick wrap-up. How's it going for you? Where are you at now? How's the podcast going overall? I think it's going well. Well, I'll tell you why: because I'm not preoccupied with how it's going. Are you anxious about whether you'll get feedback, whether people will listen, and things like that? Right now, as we're talking, my thought is that even if it's for no one—or for one person—in short, it's all exactly as it should be. I really feel completely at ease. How lovely. I'm with you on that. Okay, thank you. We'll probably meet again in a week. I came to give it a whack, but can I? Go ahead.